Nestled on the edge of Dutch island Ter Schelling, Heartbreak Hotel Cafe Restaurant promises a hunka hunka burnin' love for all things Elvis, but alas, it leaves much to be desired. While the concept is as sweet as a suspicious mind, the reality falls a bit flat, feeling more like a bad impersonation than the real deal.

The menu, inspired by the King's favorites, ends up being a one-night stand rather than a love me tender affair, with flavors that leave you singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight?" The staff, all shook up in their Elvis getups, sometimes feel like they're trapped in a jailhouse rock of their own making.

And while the view of the beach might make you want to shout "Hound Dog," it's not enough to make up for the experience. So, before you find yourself crying in the chapel, think twice about checking into Heartbreak Hotel Cafe Restaurant—it might just leave you singing the blues.

I do have to give them bonus points for the bathroom tiles and deduct some for the sexist coloring prints for kids. And for the love of God, don’t mix your mayonaise with your mustard when serving fried food—even Elvis would disapprove