Jade Mountain Resort — Attraction in Saint Lucia

We visited in June. I really really wanted to like Jade Mountain but after 6 nights I can only say it is overpriced, overhyped and overrated. I’m not saying it’s awful but just disappointing. If I had paid 1/3 of the price I would have probably given it 4 stars but for the price it is not worth it at all. Let me explain…

First of all, the first impression is horrendous. You drive up about a mile on one of the worst roads I have ever been on. I’m not sure why they don’t pave the road. It’s awful. You feel like you are going to fall off the cliff. You then pull up expecting a grand entrance as most other resorts in the Caribbean have but it looks more like a dirty carport. I have been to many other countries and resorts in the Caribbean and the entrance is by far the worst and made me question wether I wanted to turn right back around and go back to the airport and go somewhere else.

The views are outstanding especially from our rooms pool (Sun Sanctuary) and the Jade Mountain club. It’s also very secluded and not many rooms so never too crowded which was great.

The staff was very nice and accommodating for the most part but there was a huge drop off the last two days from the poor and inattentive dinner service at the jade mountain club to not being provided towels at the beach. Overall the staff was good but for some reason there was a sharp decline the last couple of days. The butler service also became increasingly difficult to get ahold of during the last few days as well. Monday-Thursday everything ran pretty smoothly. Friday and Saturday the service kind of fell apart and was well below acceptable.

The food presentation is amazing and is good for the most part. The breakfast service and food at the jade mountain club was the best. However, the other restaurants and room service are below average at best. Be mindful that all inclusive, while probably worth it over all, does not include everything. I can understand charging extra for top shelf liquor but to charge an extra $22 for a filet on top of the thousands of dollars I already paid for all inclusive is ridiculous.

It’s hot. Very hot. The only place you will find any air conditioning is the shuttle. The mosquitos will eat you alive. They provide a small candle and net around the bed but it doesn’t help. Just go in expecting that and to spend a lot of time in your pool which is great. Our room however was right below the jade mountain club so it was extremely loud all of the time and the nightly music was blaring and provided nightly migraines.

The sea and land tour we took was horrible. The one of the botanical gardens was good however. I did not factor them into my rating for jade mountain but the sea and land tour deliberately take you around people that basically harass and extort you for money and tips. A “cliff diver” jumped off about a 20 foot rock and then swam to the boat and wouldn’t let go until I gave him some money. It makes you feel extremely uncomfortable and unsafe. We spent over $700 a piece on the tour and within 30 minutes after getting off of the boat, asked the driver to take us right back to the resort. For every 10 steps I took where the boat dropped us off I was hounded by someone different for money or trying to sell me junk which I finally paid for just so they would leave us alone. Total waste of money. Horrible experience.

Overall, there isn’t anything wrong with the resort per se but I have paid a fraction of the price at other resorts that are way nicer, better food, better service. This place isn’t worth the cost at all. When you are paying $30k for a vacation you expect the best of the best and this place did not deliver at all. Not even close to meeting expectations. I was extremely disappointed and by the last two days I was counting down the hours until it was time to go home. If you are charging that much you need to deliver and then some. Time after time I was underwhelmed and gave them every chance to to deliver which did not happen. Save yourself the money and go to a different...

My husband and I spent 5 days at Jade Mountain for a belated honeymoon.

TL;DR: The views are incredible. Everything else paled in comparison.

Day 1: We landed at UVF. I had emailed the concierge back and forth and we had decided to do a helicopter ride to the resort. It was a breathtaking 8 minutes but definitely worth it. My husband loved it.

Once we got off, we were escorted to our sanctuary (JB3). It was absolutely stunning.

That night, we had dinner at the Jade Mountain Club. The food was a bit heavy, but we liked the appetizers and desserts.

Day 2: We went down to the beach and ordered food to our spot under a nice straw umbrella and comfortable beach chairs. My husband snorkeled just off the beach, and overall we had a lovely day. That night, we went to a buffet dinner and met another honeymooning couple. The service at the buffet was notably subpar compared to the Jade Club from the night before — we waited quite a bit for drinks but enjoyed much of the buffet food. We picked out a few experiences that were included in our honeymoon “Total Romance” package — a volcano tour and scuba class — and ended the day with a nightcap in our room.

Day 3: This was when things started to turn sour. We ordered breakfast in our sanctuary and had an excursion planned (which was included in our honeymoon package — a tour of the volcano, mineral baths, and botanical gardens). We ordered avocado toast (which came with fresh greens) and Eggs Benedict for breakfast and didn’t think much of it.

The volcano was lovely! We also opted to do the mud bath. (Note: If you have sensitive skin, like I do, I would not recommend it. I broke out into a rash, but this is fully my fault / my skin. My husband was perfectly fine.) When we went to the botanical gardens, we found that it was on private property. A tour guide told us that she made money from tips. We weren’t aware that we needed to bring cash (we had been tipping on all our meals thus far by charging to our room at the Jade). We asked if we could tip her via Venmo or something, and she said no, and then left us. Our driver (who had taken us on the shuttle from the resort to the volcano grounds) very generously said he would walk us around. I was turned off by the experience by then. I wish someone had told us this beforehand so we could have brought cash.

When we got back to the Jade, we decided to go to the more secluded second beach at the resort. However, my husband began feeling unwell. I felt fine but chose to accompany him back to the sanctuary. On our long walk over, we both became violently ill and believed it was due to the avocado toast we had ordered that morning. The rest of the day became a wash as we recovered in our room. We hadn’t eaten anything else that day (besides the infamous breakfast) and hadn’t been in the sun much at all besides our ~15 minute volcano tour and walk to the beach.

Day 4: My husband was supposed to do a scuba class, but because of the events of yesterday, he decided to refrain. We spent a chill day in our room and on the beach.

Day 5: We had a lovely massage in the morning (as part of the “Total Romance” package). Because we were still feeling a bit weak from Wednesday, we took it easy to save our strength for the lion fish dinner we had signed up for. The lion fish dinner was amazing — would recommend!

And so concludes our trip. We had an amazing time, and our sanctuary was mind-bogglingly beautiful. However, aside from our Major Domos (the butlers who attended to our every need), we felt the service was a bit subpar (every time I asked for something, I felt like they were annoyed at me). I think the only thing that justified the ~$4k/night price (which we paid out of pocket … this is NOT sponsored) was the sanctuary / infinity pool and its incredible views.

Summarily, this trip would be perfect if one planned on an easygoing “staycation” in the sanctuary, but we would not equivocate the overall experience to the level of some luxury resorts we’ve stayed where the amenities and service take...

We stayed here for 6 days and 5 nights in May 2024 to celebrate a birthday.

Arrival -We opted for the helicopter transfer from the resort to the airport, which cut the travel time down from 1 hour to 7 minutes! Julio, our helicopter pilot, kept the ride nice and smooth, and pointed out several landmarks on the island before we arrived at the resort helipad. -A short but bumpy car ride got us up to the top of another giant hill, where the resort is actually located.

Check-In: -We were greeted by the hostess with damp hand towels immediately upon stepping out of the car, then escorted directly to our sanctuary by our Major Domo. -Our sanctuary’s mini-fridge was already stocked with Coke, Sprite, bottled water, sparkling water, and juice. There was also a bottle of champagne on ice greeting us in our room!

Room: -We booked a Moon sanctuary, and were given JC3. This is easily the most amazing resort room I’ve ever been in! High quality hardwood floors, comfortable sectional sofa and dining chairs, and proper netting around the bed with a ceiling fan directly over the bed. -You are outside. Seriously outside. The 4th wall is conspicuously absent, going along with the natural vibe of the resort. This makes for the most amazing view I’ve ever had from a hotel room, with two large pitons in our direct line of sight! The trade off for having this amazing room is not having air conditioning in the traditional sense. There are 9 ceiling fans, and we kept them on the whole time we were there! We brought 2 extra USB-powered fans to put on the nightstands just for good measure, which were used every night! -As a result of being outside, you gotta get used to nature getting to know you. The sun is up by 6:30 am, and the birds are chirping well before that. Fortunately, the resort provides eye masks and ear plugs that work wonders for blocking out those senses before you’re ready to experience them. Fortunately, we only encountered a few insects during our stay. -The highlight of the room was the private infinity pool, which has multicolored lights and is heated to 86 degrees. It really added to the “being one with nature” feel to the room. It is 5 feet deep and is large enough to get a few strokes in! The higher level rooms have even larger pools, but the Moon sanctuary pool is plenty large for just 2 people.

Dining: -We opted for the all-inclusive plan, which covers you from dinner the day of arrival through breakfast the day of departure. We were in the Jade Mountain Club at least once every day, and I agree with other guests who report near-Michelin quality of food here! -With the all-inclusive plan, all in-room dining is covered as well, which we used primarily tor breakfast. The menu is expansive, so I’d suggest ordering something different every day to optimize your experience! There’s a tablet in the room that you can send your menu choices through. -We did the Dinner on the Celestial Terrace to celebrate the birthday properly, within earshot of the live music one floor below. Highly recommended!

-We did an in-sanctuary couples massage that came with a flower petal decorated hot tub. We were treated with champagne, a fruit platter, local chocolates, and love poems to read to each other. 5 ⭐️ experience!

Service: -Totally amazing, out of this world, 5 stars easily. Everywhere we went, the staff knew our names. Some reviewers have complained saying that they didn’t like the staff knowing where they were at all times for things like turndown service, but we loved it! We felt like royalty everywhere we went, and the staff went above and beyond to make sure every need of ours was addressed. -At check-in, you’re given a legit cell phone that can be used all over the island. The Major Domo number is programmed into it automatically, so you can easily ring them at any time, day or night! Jameel checked us in, Allain did our facility tour, and Greg was with us for most days while Elena took care of us most nights. They were all excellent, and what make this resort...