McDonald's — Restaurant in England

Well, I went to the McDonald's just off of the M62 at Goole, and I must say, it's definitely a McDonald's. You can tell because it's got the big yellow ‘M’ outside, which is clever because it reminds you of chips – and that’s exactly what they sell inside. Marketing five stars.

The place itself is like a temple to capitalism, but with fewer candles and more teenagers in visors. You walk in, and there’s these big screens where you order your food. I pressed the buttons, and it’s like magic – you pay, and then they give you food. It’s like the future but with more grease. Five stars for the buttons, because they work even if you’re slightly confused.

I had a Big Mac because it’s the most famous burger in the world. I mean, it’s got its own song – that’s how you know it’s good. And it tasted exactly like every other Big Mac I’ve ever had, which is the secret, really. Consistency. It’s like the sun coming up every day or Noel Edmonds’ beard – reliable. Five stars for consistency, because you know what you’re getting.

The fries are famously thin, which I suppose makes you feel like you’re eating less even though you’re actually eating more. That’s genius, really. And they’re salty – probably to make you buy a drink, which I did. I went for a Coke, which tasted like Coke. No surprises there. Five stars for subliminal marketing.

The staff were lovely – in that kind of programmed, cheerful way that makes you wonder if they’re allowed to feel emotions on shift. They were efficient though, like little burger robots. Five stars for efficiency, because they don’t mess about.

And the toilets were clean, which is good because you always worry about that in places where food’s involved. Five stars for the toilets, because they were cleaner than the ones in some people’s houses.

All in all, it’s a McDonald’s. Exactly what you’d expect, no more, no less. It’s like going to see an Ed Sheeran concert – you know exactly what you’re getting, and you don’t leave disappointed or surprised. Five stars because they did exactly what they promised to do: feed me quickly and with minimal effort. And sometimes, that’s all you...

This is an excellent location for a McDonald's, given that it is just off junction 36 of the M62 - making it a road journey from the town of Goole, yet ideal for a motorway pit stop.

Sadly, this does make it permanently busy and there doesn't seem to be any time where there isn't queueing and waiting. And while the staff are generally pretty good at getting slightly adjusted menus correct (no pickles on one of the burgers, for example), I have known mistakes to creep in and you would always be wise to check your food when you receive it just to be on the safe side.

Again, whilst it has an ample sized car park, at certain times, especially during the summer months, it can get almost grid lock busy. The location is responsible for all the major problems - during the summer, this is a perfect traffic stop for North coast-bound (or returning) traffic whilst during the weekdays it functions as a cheap motorway services alternative. I've known this place to have queues at 3am!

As mentioned previously, whilst the staff are pressured, they are generally very polite and try their best to get all orders correct, with any mistakes made apologised for and redone. But this is why checking before leaving is vital, as once back on the motorway its difficult to sort out a problem.

With all the above taken into account, McDonald's junction 36 is cheap, usually clean, and a decent enough place to stop on a long journey - and in the final analysis, what more can we...

Went through Drive-Through yesterday morning, ordered at 11:07, simple order. Regular Big Mac with a coffee nothing too stressful. Was told to park in car park and we'll bring it to you. Waited for Iver 10 mins, seen a young lad walk out with a bag and walk back in. Gave it another 5 mins and went to investigate. Met Sam young lad walking around with what looked like same bag of food. Asked him where my meal was and he said "white van?" No, silver van !! Ah this'll be it and passed me the bag. Food was clap cold so refused it. He said they'd do me another, waited another 10-15 minutes for a replacement. Bag was handed over with a "here mate". No apology, no replacement coffee, now cold sat in van. The place was absolute chaos, putting together big orders for UberEats deliveries whilst customers were stood waiting for their food orders. It was a last minute decision to call and I wish I hadn't, won't be rushing back I...