Parc Britannia — Restaurant in Wales

As a weary UK road warrior, I’ve seen my share of budget hotels and pub grub, but this Premier Inn and its adjacent “restaurant” (a generous term) take the biscuit—a stale, overcooked one, mind you. Buckle up for a tale so absurd it’s almost performance art, but trust me, you don’t want a ticket.

Picture this: I stroll into the pub for a pint and a bite, expecting a cozy evening. The place is quieter than a library at midnight, with empty tables galore, yet there’s a queue of four at the bar. One barperson, moving at the pace of a sloth on sedatives, serves with all the warmth of a January puddle. I order a single pint—simple, right? Apparently not. The small dark-haired female behind the bar treats my request like I’ve asked them to solve quantum physics. The pint arrives, though, and credit where it’s due: the glass was clean, and the beer didn’t taste like regret.

Emboldened, I decide to brave the food menu. Enter stage left: a second staff member, described by others as “half-cast” (I’ll stick to saying she looked like she was mentally on Mars). This lady’s vibe screams “I’m here for the paycheck, not the pleasantries.” Rude, aloof, and with the charisma of a damp sock, she takes my order for a starter and main like I’m interrupting her existential crisis. I’m not expecting a red carpet, but a smile wouldn’t hurt, mate.

The starter—nachos, a snip at £6.99—arrives on what I swear was a saucer from a child’s tea set. Dry yet soggy (a culinary paradox), they’re served with no cutlery, so I channel my inner caveman and scoop with my hands. Meanwhile, the pub’s running a £6 meal deal for a burger and chips. Nachos, you’ve been robbed. Forty minutes later—yes, forty—my main course, the “smothered platter,” stumbles in. The restaurant’s still half-empty, but the bar queue’s growing, with one heroic sloth-server now joined by two new faces who seem equally baffled by the concept of urgency.

The platter itself? A tragic comedy. The “4oz” steak is smaller than a digestive biscuit and so overcooked it could double as a hockey puck. Medium rare? Maybe in a past life. The gammon’s passable, but the cheese is a greasy, rubbery affront to dairy. Onion rings are hard enough to double as coasters, and the chips—oh, the chips—are a chaotic mix of raw and cremated. There’s a lot of food, but quantity doesn’t equal quality. It’s like they tried to smother my enthusiasm instead of the platter.

Now, let’s talk service—or the lack thereof. Tables around me are a cutlery-free zone. No forks, no knives, no napkins. Diners are begging for utensils like they’re auditioning for Oliver Twist. The waitress, bless her, mumbles, “Oh, haven’t they put them out? Sorry,” before vanishing faster than my appetite. My table’s no exception—dirty, uncleared, and utensil-less. I flag down a server for a fork and napkin, feeling like I’m negotiating a UN treaty. In the 2.5 hours I’m there, not a single table is cleaned. It’s like the staff are staging a protest against hygiene.

The Premier Inn itself? Same vibe, different stage. Checking in feels like crashing a private gossip session. The bloke and two women at reception barely acknowledge me, exuding all the warmth of a broken radiator. Awkward doesn’t cover it—I’m pretty sure my arrival ruined their chat. The hotel and pub are littered with signs begging for Google reviews, so here’s mine: a standing ovation for incompetence. If you’re a local looking for a cheap pint and a laugh, maybe this place has charm. But for anyone else? Run. I’m dreading breakfast and already plotting my escape to the Porthmadog Premier Inn, where the staff are friendly, the food’s edible, and the tables are—gasp—clean. This place? It’s a sitcom where the joke’s on you. Save your sanity and...

Dreadful Dreadful Dreadful. Please don't waste your time. Waited 5 minutes to be seated so should have gone elsewhere. Server asked if I wanted to add chips to my fajita burger, which I declined. Food took longer than expected, chips had been added and no side order of chilli, which the menu said it included. Server put plate down and ran, and either didn't hear me or chose not to hear me when I called her back. As she immediately disappeared and no other Server was in sight I waited at an empty bar, alongside a customer who said she was trying to find someone to ask where the deserts ordered 30 minutes earlier was. Eventually saw a different Server and told her the problem- she said she'd sort it - no apology given.(during this time a group of 4 people were waiting even longer than I had to be seated and they eventually left). Server bought a tablespoon of chilli in a pot and galloped off, ignoring the issue of the chips I'd declined. Ate my meal, excluding chips, went to pay, bar still empty so waited a while for the same Server (the one I'd reminded that i hadnt ordered chips earlier) to arrive to take payment. She handed me the receipt and ran. I'd been charged for the unrequested chips so I waited a few minutes for someone to come to the bar, then cut my losses, decided 99p wasn't worth the wait and left. So in summary: Served food I'd specifically declined- and was charged for it Not served food that was part of my ordered meal No bar staff, and servers were few and far between, trying to work the bar between serving meals Waited ages to be seated and served. Staff dont think an apology is required...

Really disappointed with this place. Firstly when we arrived, after booking a table for 10, the waitress showed us to a group of tables and told us to sort it out for ourselves. Then just as we finished doing that, they wanted our drinks order, we asked for a few minutes but this became 30! When the food eventually arrived in drips and drabs, the stuffing on the roast dinner was still cold as if it had just come out of the fridge. Some of us had finished our food before other plates had arrived. The bottomless roast was just 1 extra plate of roast potatoes and Yorkshire puddings to share btwn 3 people. During the meal, not once did anyone come over to check everything was ok, and no one came to clear plates. We waited 30 mins after finishing our mains, no one came to the table, I then had to go to the bar to ask them to bring out the kids desserts which were ordered when we ordered the mains, when they eventually came, plates still weren't cleared and no one else was asked if they wanted more drinks or any desserts. We were there in total for 3 hours as service was so poor and slow, the restaurant was not busy in fact it was virtually empty especially when we left. We told the bar staff about the cold food on the 3 roast dinners and they weren't interested and didn't apologise. Will not be coming here again and would definitely not...