Greisinger Museum — Attraction in Jenins

TL;DR The tour through this museum is, above all, a power trip for the owner Bernd Greisinger. You'll enjoy it if what you want is a tour of AT LEAST the duration he offers, there is ZERO flexibility to shorten it, and if you don't mind being the target of some light to heavy insults (depending on your ethnicity and income).

Duration of the tour: The website states the tour takes two hours, which is a simply not true. You'd think that if a group booked a tour (of whatever planned length) and repeatedly said that they'd be happy with a shorter (2 hour) version for the same fee, a good host would be accommodating, but the problem is that Bernd is not a good host. This is a man who's assembled a large collection of objects he knows many people want to see and figured out that by keeping the objects hostage, he can force people to listen to him talk. We stood in the entrance for over 2 hours while he gave us information that could have been condensed into 45 minutes tops.

The introduction: Part of the introduction is that Bernd goes around the circle of visitors, asking each person whether they've read or watched a given book/film adaptation. This is the most pointlessly inefficient method of collecting this information, which leads me to the conclusion that he chooses it because he enjoys making people uncomfortable by judging them individually for not having read/seen something. (Instead of denying it, Bernd, prove me wrong and stop asking people about what they've read, because you're not using the information except to shame your guests.)

The xenophobia: Bernd also insists on finding out, again one by one, is where his guests are from. Oh, what he means is where you're actually from. Like the most cartoonish racist, he apologised not for asking the question in the first place, but for not being clear that he was asking about people's ethnicities. He might claim that this is a necessary part of the introduction because he talks about the role of race in Tolkien's writing. It's not, Bernd, people are very aware of the social phenomena race and racism. And again, we've told you the question makes people uncomfortable. Stop asking it.

His relationship with Tolkien: He says he's read more than 3000 books about Tolkien and his creations. It takes someone extraordinary to read 3000 books on a topic and not have a single original thought about it. Tolkien says a language is trash? It's gospel. Any adaptation that doesn't follow his writing literally is trash. He will rant for five minutes about Gandalf's hat and beard being grey in Jackson's films (instead of blue/white) and how Hollywood has to dumb everything down, but when you ask him if the blue hat would have had a specific meaning, his only response is: "No, but it's what Tolkien wrote." The same goes for the trolls not being the height that Tolkien described. Neither is an interesting talking point, they're meaningless sermons. Tolkien is god, anyone who sullies his work with the slightest deviation is blasphemous, and Bernd is the brave missionary carrying his lord's most cruel opinions (and his least consequential descriptions) into the world.

His relationship with his collection: Bernd has collected these items not because he wants to ensure their protection and conservation but because he wants to OWN them. With the tone of a petulant child, he will say: "Only I am allowed to touch things." This attitude probably stems from his worldview which separates people into the haves and the have nots. At the start of the tour, he belittled us (a university research group) for our career choice by saying: "I never went to university. I created businesses and made money instead."

This could have been the best museum visit of our lives. The tour could have explored and celebrated the richness of Tolkien's world while also being critical of some of its aspects. Instead,...

The museum gains a star for the superb collection of artefacts and curiosities held by the museum, kept in a wonderfully maintained and beautiful exhibition. At this museum you can see original props from the Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit series of films, a marvellous array of sculptures and figurines and even items from Tolkien's own home. You would have difficulty finding a more enthusiastic and knowledgable guide than Mr. Greisinger, who has clearly put an immense amount of time and effort into his collection.

The museum loses three stars however for the frankly appalling treatment of its paying guests. Pay no attention to any information given on the website - the 3.5 hour tour seems to be a myth. We arrived at the museum at 10.00 for a prompt start and, after being greeted by Mr. Greisinger and welcomed inside, he rather quickly and brashly decided that the group's knowledge of Middle-earth and Tolkien in general was lacking and we needed a "quick" overview before we could see the museum proper. He began a monologue in the cramped entrance room of the museum regarding Tolkien, his life and inspirations. The first 30 minutes or so were interesting. After an hour, people became uncomfortable. After two hours, people became visibly upset and in discomfort, resorting to sitting on the floor or going outside for air. After three hours, we started to get angry. After almost four hours of Mr. Greisinger's monologue, including innumerable tangents onto topics barely related to Tolkien and his universe, we were almost ready to leave the museum. The tour had already passed 3.5 hours and we hadn't even entered the museum proper.

A four hour lecture is difficult enough at the best of times, but Mr Greisinger interspersed his with bizarre comments and questionable remarks. At first, we just laughed it off as banter - English and French are awful languages, women belong at home, the kind of thing people say to get a reaction. He kept repeating these comments though, both during the initial monologue and also when we finally got to enter the museum itself. Eventually one has to wonder if Mr. Greisinger does actually believe the things he says. During his speech he made a point to ask questions in a rather aggressive manner, often getting quite close to one's face. I could see that at least one guest became rather uncomfortable throughout.

After acquiring the knowledge necessary to enter the museum, Mr. Greisinger told us that we could sit anywhere we wanted, except on the tables; finally, a rest! That is, until you realise that there are absolutely no chairs anywhere in the museum and he actually means you can sit on the floor (except for the first room where there is one chair, which Mr. Greisinger made an immediate bee-line towards.) There are no drinks or food offered by the museum until the very end, so the tour was a very thirsty and hungry affair. Yes, food and drink is permitted throughout the building, but one would think that during an almost 8 hour long tour the guests would be permitted respite to eat and drink while seated. No such luck. There was also one toilet situated right at the front of the museum which most guests seemed to be too frightened to go to.

As I said earlier, the museum has an amazing array of things to see once you finally get into it, and the walls are adorned with wonderful artworks of the Middle-earth universe. The problem was we were so tired, hungry and frankly angry by the time we got there we couldn't enjoy the artefacts.

Edit to Mr. Greisinger's comment: we chose the four hour tour. Please don't insult our intelligence. The lack of respect you have for your paying guests is appalling. Review reduced to one star. It's at least somewhat gratifying to see I am far from the only one who had...

Do you find it normal in a supposed "guided tour" of a Museum about J.R.R. Tolkien, that the "guide" speaks to the visitors as if there were stupid little children who need a good beating with words? Well then, this Museum is for you!

Do you find it normal in a supposed "tour of the house", that you spend more than THREE hours listening to a man that wants to lecture you pedantically, on a demaning tone and with physical and vocal intimidation on a subject rather than letting you see the collection? Well then, this Museum is for you!

Are you French or English-speaking and want to listen a few hundred times over about how your native tongue is "trash" and that your school system has "failed you" ?

Do you want to hear about Mr Greisinger's views and opinions on subjects that are TOTALLY related to Tolkien's books such as : current world wars and territorial politics your religious beliefs or lack thereof what your country of origin says about you what women look for in men and how they should look how to pronounce words like "merci" how universities teach gender studies how the schooling system has failed us how people should take a seat around tables how being a fan of the Peter Jackson movies or any other franchise is stupid etc.

Well, this Museum is for you!

Do you want to listen to that from 10am to 1pm without breaks, not knowing that you had to bring your own food to eat at the place, and be scolded for being "not prepared" as if you were a boyscout?

Do you want to see Mr Greisinger get annoyed, petty and intimidating when you make the remark that MAYBE after three hours of ex-cathedra confused and scattered lecturing, we could see the collection he's been taking us hostage for?

Do you find it respecful when the tour hours are 10am - 2.40pm that you still haven't entered the Museum at 1pm ? Do you find it respectful when the guide doesn't care about overtime, stating that he can go on forever and so should you ?

Do you want to hear a comparison between Gandalf and the Pope?

Do you think I'm joking?

Do you wanna spend 50.- CHF to find...