Fyansford Hotel — Restaurant in Victoria

I'm giving this place 5*'s for still being in business ... and that's where it ends!

Booked, arrived on time for 6.30pm, placed in an annex room off main area as it was a birthday celebration.

Took a few minutes to find the reservation; I started becoming anxious I had booked at a different place.

Hostess then sped off despite one of our guests having a clearly obvious walking disability and trying to keep up with her.

The seating was in a lovely area (once the sun set) until then, if you were facing the highway, the sun blinded you and on asking got told to 'just hold a bit, the sun will move soon' when asking if they had a blind or window covering to pull down a bit to make the situation a bit more pleasant.

We shared the space with a very big group ... with very loud voices by some of their guests competing to be the loudest! So much so, that the guests at our table could not hear each other.

At this point we should have gotten up to leave, but having already placed and paid for our order just on 7pm, we had no choice but to wait. And wait ... and wait ... and wait ...

At some point a garlic bread starter arrived for 2 of our guests ... while the rest of us waited some more.

At the hour mark, one of our guests offered to go and check on the meal ... to be promptly told 'you only ordered 40mins ago, you'll have to wait 10mins more' while having the food docket waived in her face!

Eventually the food arrived with massive attitude... the mussels arrived with most of them still closed ... because why not live on the edge and give yourself food poisoning - needless to say these were returned uneaten along with most of the seafood platter. the salt and pepper squid needed pepper and a lot less time in the fryer (think leather strips on your plate) the steak special ... 300g porterhouse that was not actually porterhouse but looked, cut and presented like chuck cut into the shape of a porterhouse ... massive fat pockets, sinew, flacid ... but smother a sauce over it and hope the person eating it doesn't figure out its not the cut advertised!

Thank God for the wings ... they were the saving grace to feeding everyone last night!

The cake we brought filled some of the gap, after watching and waiting in anticipation on whether the sparkler was going to die out before it was walked over to the table... high on suspense, bets were taken and at this point I wondered if it was actually my birthday! The sparkler died and another sourced...at least this one got to the table at the halfway point (sigh of relief breathed)!

By this point, the next door table were completely out of hand, but this was tolerated as they had one of the owners sitting at it ... so entitlement ruled! With volumes rising by the minute as the drinks went down, to the point where fingers were being put in ears to drown out the noise!

Needless to say we will not be back ... once this might have been an amazing establishment, today it's just a shitshow inside 4 walls, with no concern for good customer service, reasonably priced and fresh food and just fair...

The main points that disappointed me was the food was subpar at best and the service was abysmal.

I had the crispy pork belly and it was like they had boiled it and then slightly pan fried it afterwards; the meat was tough and dry, and just had no flavour. The others at the table said similar; food was edible, but bland and just not nice.

The service was shocking. The first instance of bad customer service I had was when my daughter walked around the table to sit on nans lap. A server was coming through the walkway with food; my daughter was already at nan and trying to climb up on nans lap before the server even came near our table and she was not in the walk way at all, but the table next to us were standing and chatting in the walk way. Rather than politely asking the other table to be seated or to move out of the way, she turn to our table and rudely said "want to get your kid out of the way??" Then pushed past our table, making nan scoot her chair over so she could get past. Had she have asked nicely and waited for us to move, all would have been fine, but she was very, very rude. The second instance I had with the same server was nan had taken my daughter to go play whilst I finished eating. I was halfway through my meal (it was bad, but I was hungry!) when this server picked my cutlery and plate up when I paused between mouthfuls, and walked off with it! She didnt ask me if I was done...

Dear friends, grab a glass of something hearty and let’s take a culinary jaunt to the Fyansford Hotel, a self-proclaimed “Country Pub,” nestled by Victoria’s Barwon and Moorabool Rivers like a weathered old mate who’s seen a few gold rushes in his time. Picture this, a two-storey brick pile from 1854, all Colonial Georgian charm with its symmetrical windows and a corner entrance that’s been tinkered with over the years but still winks at history. I sauntered into the 200-seat bistro, expecting a proper pub feed, and oh, what a scene! It’s buzzing like a summer’s day in Provence, with families, kids scampering to the playroom—complete with climbing gear and a fire crackling for that cozy, let’s-have-a-natter vibe. The outdoor deck, they say, is the spot for summer, but I was here to taste, not tan. Now, the menu’s a tome, a veritable encyclopedia of pub grub with ambition and the staff were as warm as the fireplace. Portions are generous and the quality’s generally a cut above your average hotel fare. So, what’s the verdict? The Fyansford Hotel’s a cracking spot for a feed, whether you’re a local, a traveler, or just passing by on the Geelong By-Pass. It’s not flawless—consistency could use a nudge—but with fresh ingredients, a menu that could feed an army, and a vibe that’s equal parts cozy and chaotic, it’s a pub that delivers more often than...