The Orchard Thieves Pizza Parkvale — Restaurant in North Island

Orchard Thieves Pizza isn’t just a takeaway. It’s a lifestyle. It’s a spiritual awakening wrapped in mozzarella and delivered to your door hotter than your cousin’s new Tinder match.

The staff? Pure legends. MD Paaji greets you like you’re walking into a Bollywood wedding. He doesn’t just hand you your pizza; he practically baptises you with garlic butter. Hospitality so good, I’m convinced they’d carry me home on a throne of naan if I asked politely enough.

First, let’s talk bases. These crusts aren’t just baked — they’re engineered. One bite and I swear I astral-projected back to my childhood, where life was simple, my knees were scabby, and my only debt was to the corner dairy for a 50-cent mixture. The sauce? Redder than my Uncle after two Lion Reds. The cheese? Melted with such sensual precision that I briefly considered proposing to it.

Now, the toppings. Fresh? Brother, they’re so fresh I half expected the capsicum to ask me for my ID at the door. The paneer pizza hits so hard it should come with a seatbelt. And don’t even get me started on the mango pizza — it’s like Willy Wonka went on holiday to Punjab and never came back.

Uber Eats may try to sabotage the experience, turning your piping hot pizza into a sad frisbee by the time it arrives. But the shop itself? Straight-up perfection. It’s like the Michelin Guide accidentally got drunk in Greerton and gave out five stars to the wrong place — but hey, we’re all here for it.

In conclusion: Orchard Thieves Pizza is less of a food joint and more of a legal high. Forget therapy. Forget church. Just buy the damn pizza. Paneer...

I never got a chance to try the food due to the horrific service I received several months back, I would’ve written this sooner had I known that Orchard Theives “Merivale” wasn’t the name. I went to order my food which totalled $24.99 and handed the cashier $25 in cash. I should’ve known things were about to go left when he looked at the cash with confusion, however, he accepted and allowed me to wait in my car.

Little did I know that he would then spin a story to his colleague about me NOT paying for the order because why did his colleague then YELL at me from the door to come inside before demanding me at the cashier that “YOU NEED TO PAY!” While my $20 & $5 notes were right next to his hand. Regardless of whether I paid or not, you hadn’t even MADE THE ORDER TO BE YELLING AT ME!!!!!! Absolutely racist let’s be real because why else would you accuse and abuse a brown Māori woman of non-payment in the hood for an order you HADN’T EVEN MADE. Never been back, never...

I ordered online at around 5.30ish & I chose 6.30pm for pick up so hubby could pick them up after work, they called me before 6.15pm to say they was ready, which means they had been waiting for me to pick up before then. I told them I asked for 6.30pm he said ok and hung up. When hubby arrived the pizzas were cold, hubby pointed it out. The younger worker offered to make fresh ones, the older worker said no - reheat them. This dried out and over cooked 2 of our pizza's. To apologise the younger worker told hubby to grab a drink from the fridge where the bottles are, the older worker said no, get him a can from out the back. Terrible customer service! This was our 1st time ordering from this store. I want to say NEVER AGAIN but because of the younger worker, I might give them one more chance... eventually. My 1 star is for the younger worker, 2 stars for food because the base was better than...