The Swan Inn, Newland — Restaurant in Malvern Hills

What a disappointment! Having asked a local butcher for the name of a good black and white restaraunt for a nice meal to impress our German visitor, The Swan at Newland was suggested. I took George's advice and booked a table for Thursday 8th August this year and arrived at the appointed time. The setting is very nice and the restaraunt itself is a lovely old black and white building . We were received by some excellent staff who were very polite and attentative. Our German visitor and I ordered starters , one smoked mackerel and for myself, the whitebait which we both enjoyed, my other half declined a starter as she wanted to ensure that she could enjoy her main course. My other half ordered Hereford beef pie and we two men ordered Sirloin steak for our main course. What a mistake! The beef pie required a steak knife to be stabbed into the crust to break it and the two steaks ( medium) arrived bareley cooked and as tough as old boots. Our guest did not wish to appear rude and made the effort and ate most of his, mine went home with us and our German Shepherd struggled very bravely to clear the 80% which I found impossible to eat. The sweet that we finished off with was OK but really nothing to write home about. A lesson in cooking steaks would not go amiss as it appeared that the grill was not hot enough when the steaks were placed on it. The giveaway signs being that the brown stripes and the remaining meat being grey and not brown. A good steak needs to rest to be tender! Apologies to Duncan Ironmonger but you have not kept your finger on...

In short, definitely avoid if you have children, and you're better off eating elsewhere if you don't.

The proprietor seems to have an odd sense of humour. I booked a table for 6, stating that it included my two children, so I was surprised to discover that it is unusually anti-children there. My children (2 and 4yrs) are well behaved and sat quietly at the table throughout, which fits the expectations that the proprietor explicitly states on the back of the menu. That note is a gratuitous self-indulgent rant that I can't understand why any sober businessman would place there. If the swan doesn't want children, it should simply say so in advance and save the awkwardness. Not providing high chairs and requesting complaints be directed to the local MP for after "he" has filed his parliamentary expenses, seems like it might have been an inside joke. Our MP is a woman, and the business decision should anyway be irrelevant to her, so I'll flag the hostility to children here instead in the hope others don't accidentally book here with kids.

Of course, many people won't have children, which raises my rating to 2-stars. No better than that, though, because the service was extremely slow and the food (Sunday...

We arrived at The Swan Inn on the 11/12/2021 for lunch and were seated in on bar area as the restaurant was apparently full. We were also told you can’t book ahead.

After being seated I the bar my first impressions were not good, the atmosphere wasn’t good with giving us dirty looks as we had a child with us. Of course The Swann Inn can’t help what it’s customers do but apart from that I found it very uncomfortable to sit as the bar table was very low and I’m quite tall. You could tell it was just meant for drinks.

However, what stopped me from giving this a 2/3 star review was the food. The food quality and taste were amazing! We all had the Sunday roast and it was the best roast we have had in a long time. They also offer a nut roast for vegetarians. I also food the bar staff to be very friendly which made the first experience better.

If you want to go for food I would recommend going at not peak times so you can sit in the restaurant or for the Swann to start taking bookings. Otherwise you will not be disappointed...