Swan Inn, MK — Restaurant in Milton Keynes

We had a booking today for Fathers Day at table 74, 4 people at 1pm, and I just have to leave this review for the sake of the staff. First of all, we were running a couple of mins late - called ahead, and the staff were very accommodating.

We had a lovely time, food was a tad slow (but it was Fathers Day, and a Sunday, where EVERYONE wants Sunday lunch!) Drinks were quick and we could order at the bar if we needed. Atmosphere was lovely, even though the staff were clearly slammed, and my impression was they were a couple people short today; not their fault.

When we arrived, we couldn’t be met and seated right away, but only because some entitled prong was bullying the lady on host for so long, she couldn’t physically leave the conversation. From what I could gather, he had been given a table, but this absolute melon did not LIKE the table he was given. I heard every word of the exchange. He said he was going to ‘hang around’ and ‘give her a hard time’. He berated and belittled the poor staff member so much that she was near tears by the time she got to us, and when she was saying sorry to him , multiple times, this human manifestation of an ingrown toenail shouted ‘no you’re not’ over his shoulder as he stropped out the door, saying ‘you’ll be hearing from me’.

I need to make it clear - if you do hear from this idiot - he’s chatting garbage. The staff could not have been nicer today, on a day where things were very difficult (and I believe a system glitch had occurred with bookings too??). Not only had they been able to give the guy a table, they’d managed to do it where there was no table to give, according to the broken system. The lady was nothing but professional and apologetic about the situation where frankly, the guy was acting like a complete child.

I do not want this lady dragged in a low review where is it not deserved at all, I wish I had her name but she was wearing a blue shirt, and she had come in today when she was supposed to be off. She seated us at table 74 very quickly, offered water straight away, and was a joy to speak to when we were leaving. Props to her, and her colleagues who were all working so hard today. No one deserves to be bullied in their place of work.

Thank you Swan Inn for another lovely experience. Myself and my family will always come back, your staff do an excellent job and the food is great, even on the busiest days...

All areas given 1star, only because i can’t give a half!

There is nothing good I can say about The Swan Inn experience. Not greeted on arrival. Had to go to the bar as staff did not come to the table for drinks order. Waited a long time before staff even acknowledged us, even though we were a pre booked party of 6. Numerous small black flies all around the bar area and table throughout the meal. Despite pre-ordering our meals, from the festive menu, once the main course arrived we noticed that several items we told would be part of the meal were missing ( pigs in blankets, broccoli, red cabbage). When we asked staff, we were told “it’s Sunday we have run out sorry, we don’t have any of that”. When challenged she stated that if we had asked when we came in she would have told us!! The manager apologised, but it continued. As the gravy arrived at the table the same staff member told my 16yr old son “well are you going to help?” as she tried to put the gravy boats on the table! The desserts arrived and somehow the pre ordered cheese board appeared as a Christmas pudding!There was another really long delay, whilst we could hear staff debating what the order should have been. Due to most of the group nearly finishing their desserts the Cheeseboard was cancelled! Those that had desserts were not given cutlery so we had to help ourselves to forks from an empty table. An elderly member of the group asked for a glass of water….that never arrived. Coffee, what could possibly go wrong……. two came out lukewarm, one which was sent back. It was replaced, but when it arrived it came in a cup without a saucer, very unprofessional. Even though the manager and one member of staff were apologetic this did not go anywhere near to compensating for the complete mess they made of our family Christmas celebration. Reflecting back the discount offered was even an insult and I wish I had refused to pay. We were asked to pre-order and pay a deposit, for what was extremely poor service an experience that was a complete disaster, a meal that had undercooked veg several items missing, a plate of food that had zero Christmas or festive appeal. If you have pre-ordered the Festive menu it may be worth checking what you’re getting on arrival. I will not be returning, all in all a really awful...

Poor service, gone downhill and doesn’t respect regular, local customers. As the table said next to us as they left their table to find their own cutlery: “be careful, they might give you a job” whilst their two waitresses chatted and sat on their phones.

I’m a business owner who has brought my staff to this restaurant regularly for the last 2-3 years. We have come here for the last two Christmas meals, birthdays and a summer event, as well as being here at Christmas with friends and family.

Today we visited and was completely embarrassed as one of your new waitresses refused my 23-year-old lad a beer with his food because he didn’t have ID. This person didn’t know the law and had to go get the former bartender but now manager, to come over and explain why he can’t have a drink. The manager did not care that we were regular customers who spent £500 at Christmas on a work dinner, nor the sheer logic of using your brain that a boss taking his team out isn’t buying 15-year-olds their first beer at lunch. Unfortunately the pair of them were in Computer Says No mode, repeating “Challenge 25” like anybody in the 10-15 years that has existed, has ever used that whilst asking a 23-year-old for ID with a pub lunch.

The word I believe is jobsworths. Aside from that extremely frustrating and outright ridiculous experience, the service has gone completely downhill in six months. The previous manager has left, the newly promoted bartender is out of her depth, and two replacements are more bothered about their nails and phones than serving customers (over an hour for some burgers and 30 minutes for our first drinks).

I hope the owner reads this and understands first and foremost how important local customers and businesses are. For us to explain we was here at Christmas and you served our lad a pint, last summer, and the Christmas before, and yet you simply do not care and essentially call us liars: seriously?! It’s one beer.

I will never return to this pub again unfortunately. A shame considering we spend around £1,000 a year with you. Have a word with your waitresses and the explain that using that brain sometimes...