Picture this: fake grass slapped lazily over a sloped sidewalk – yeah, that's their idea of 'course design.' Each hole feels like a cruel joke from the universe, as your ball rolls right back towards you or straight on down the hill if you're on the back 9.

And oh, the thrill continues as you watch your ball roll relentlessly towards oblivion, joining its brethren in the inevitable mass convergence at the end of each hole. It's like a twisted game of 'follow the leader,' but instead of joy, you're left with an ever increasing score.

But wait, there's more! Even those beautiful dinosaur sculptures aren't up to par on this course – the awful sounds they make are an obstacle all by themselves! Prepare for a symphony of headache-inducing roars that'll have you questioning how many holes are left before you can jump back in your car.

You know it's bad when you catch yourself daydreaming about playing mini golf with actual goats – at least they'd add some unpredictability to this, so-called "mini golf" experience.

Save your $12 and steer clear of this catastrophe. There are better mini golf courses just a couple of minutes away.

P.S. the mountain coaster is fun.