DoubleTree by Hilton Hotel Tinton Falls - Eatontown — Hotel in Tinton Falls

I recently had an unforgettable stay at the Best Western Plus Deer Park, and let me tell you, it was an experience unlike any other. From the moment I arrived, things were off to a bizarre start. A friendly old chap named Joe Smith, who I can only assume is a local legend, greeted me at the front desk. He handed me my room key and proceeded to serenade me with Strange Fruit by Billie Holiday while escorting me to my room. It was oddly charming, but also a little unsettling, like something out of a dream—or a strange horror movie. I was with my good friends Gerry and Gezepe, and as we walked through the lobby, we were suddenly confronted by a group of loud, ratchet "Debbies" who were shouting at us to "go to Dairy Queen" and "free the four." It was all very confusing, and honestly, I didn't know whether to laugh or call the authorities. We were just standing there, full of nuts, wondering what in the world was happening. Then one of the Debbies, whose name I could swear was “Squeeze,” handed me an open jar of mayonnaise and demanded that I "spread the love." I had no idea how to respond, but I did accept the jar for a moment before retreating, unsure if I'd just been inducted into some bizarre cult. After that surreal encounter, we decided to kick back and watch the Crystal Palace vs. Saint Louis City game on the big screen. Saint Louis City was on a power play, and the crowd was screaming, "Show CP the stars and stripes!" It felt like I was watching some sort of sports ritual, and I was just waiting for someone to start chanting about the meaning of life. But instead, we met a mysterious man named Virgil Tibbs, who insisted that the graveyard nearby was the "coolest spot in town." Naturally, we declined the offer, because who goes to a graveyard on vacation? As we walked away, Virgil shouted after us, “The moon is only half-full, so beware the shadow of the Jackalope!” I didn’t know what that meant, but I think it was meant to be a warning. Instead, we went to Drake's—where we were greeted by a commercial featuring a man with red stripes trying to impress a woman. It was bizarre, but oddly captivating. Then, Life Is Just a Living played on the speakers, and I had a deep, existential moment. The music was so good, I almost forgot I needed to refresh my beverage. As the song ended, the waitress—who had eyes that seemed to blink in different rhythms—brought me a drink that was... uncomfortably warm. I didn’t ask any questions, though, and just nodded politely as I sipped it. Returning to the hotel, things got even weirder. We saw Ski Bri, Sydney Sweeney, Totsi, Charlie the Commentator, and Spiro—yes, all of them—having a conversation about taking a "ziz right quick." I didn’t ask for clarification. By this point, I was simply trying to keep up with the madness around me. Ski Bri suddenly stopped and pointed at an empty chair, demanding, "Find the squirrel with the monocle. It knows all!" and just as quickly as they had appeared, they vanished into the night, leaving behind only the echo of a confused cawing sound. In the middle of the night, I heard some strange sounds outside. It was the pastor, hunting buffalo with Chief Big Ook. They were doing some sort of moon dance and chanting, "This is the Johnson of odds, ya dig?" I have no idea what that means, but I didn’t want to know. To top it all off, a blessed babe appeared out of nowhere and offered me a taste of cuy chakato. I politely declined, though I’m still not entirely sure what that is. "It tastes like the dreams of a goat," the babe told me with a wink. I wasn't sure how to process that, so I just nodded and took a step back, feeling a little too aware of the smell of wet moss creeping up from the hallway. weird place to stay. im not sure if ill be...

Unfortunately, this hotel does not bring the experience that a top-tier Hilton should bring. ||I always check in on my app so that I can skip the front desk. It works well for me and my identity is already approved through the app. Our check in time is 3 PM and when I got to the hotel, my digital key would not work. I literally had my hands full of Stuff that we were ringing into the hotel room so we could walk right to the room, use my digital key and keep it moving. Since my digital key was not working, I did have to stop by the front desk. Showed him that we checked in and he said that he needed to see my ID. I had to put all of ny stuff down and search for my wallet because we never have to go through this process to get to our room. That’s the whole point of me checking in early and getting a digital key. He told me that due to my tier, he has to check my ID. So if I was higher up, like a diamond member, he would not have to check my identification. This seems like discrimination and I truly did not appreciate that.||||The first thing that I do when I am in a room is lower the air conditioner because I’m a naturally hot person. I set the room to 68° at 315pm, because that is a reasonable temperature for the summer heat. At 5:30 I noticed that the thermostat had not gone lower than 73° and I went downstairs to let the front desk know. The gentleman at the front desk then told me that I needed to give it 10 to 15 minutes before it starts to kick in. I let him know that I have been there for 2 1/2 hours and he was shocked that time went by so fast. He sent somebody to look at the thermostat and I was told that it was gonna be working just fine. We left the hotel at 6:30 PM and came back after midnight for it to still only be 73°. I was told that they have an eco-friendly AC system, so when I leave the room it shuts off. That seems counterproductive when it gets to be 75+ degrees in a room and you walk in to what feels like an absolute sauna. Now that we are back in the room 1am(ish), I decided to give it 20 minutes or so before we realized that the temperature was not going to go any less than 73°. We were told we could switch rooms, but we had plans and I had already set up a very time sensitive evening. I was so exhausted by the time we got back that I thought I could maybe try to sleep. I tossed and turned all night long and it was so hot. ||All in all, this isn’t a very inviting property. It is very loud and you can hear people all down the hallway in their rooms. The smell of marijuana on our floor was insanely overbearing. And again, I’ve never heard of eco-friendly AC units in rooms, but how does it even know the difference of us leaving the room...

Unfortunately, this hotel does not bring the experience that a top-tier Hilton should bring.

I always check in on my app so that I can skip the front desk. It works well for me and my identity is already approved through the app. Our check in time is 3 PM and when I got to the hotel, my digital key would not work. I literally had my hands full of Stuff that we were ringing into the hotel room so we could walk right to the room, use my digital key and keep it moving. Since my digital key was not working, I did have to stop by the front desk. Showed him that we checked in and he said that he needed to see my ID. I had to put all of ny stuff down and search for my wallet because we never have to go through this process to get to our room. That’s the whole point of me checking in early and getting a digital key. He told me that due to my tier, he has to check my ID. So if I was higher up, like a diamond member, he would not have to check my identification. This seems like discrimination and I truly did not appreciate that.

The first thing that I do when I am in a room is lower the air conditioner because I’m a naturally hot person. I set the room to 68° at 315pm, because that is a reasonable temperature for the summer heat. At 5:30 I noticed that the thermostat had not gone lower than 73° and I went downstairs to let the front desk know. The gentleman at the front desk then told me that I needed to give it 10 to 15 minutes before it starts to kick in. I let him know that I have been there for 2 1/2 hours and he was shocked that time went by so fast. He sent somebody to look at the thermostat and I was told that it was gonna be working just fine. We left the hotel at 6:30 PM and came back after midnight for it to still only be 73°. I was told that they have an eco-friendly AC system, so when I leave the room it shuts off. That seems counterproductive when it gets to be 75+ degrees in a room and you walk in to what feels like an absolute sauna. Now that we are back in the room 1am(ish), I decided to give it 20 minutes or so before we realized that the temperature was not going to go any less than 73°. We were told we could switch rooms, but we had plans and I had already set up a very time sensitive evening. I was so exhausted by the time we got back that I thought I could maybe try to sleep. I tossed and turned all night long and it was so hot.

All in all, this isn’t a very inviting property. It is very loud and you can hear people all down the hallway in their rooms. The smell of marijuana on our floor was insanely overbearing. And again, I’ve never heard of eco-friendly AC units in rooms, but how does it even know the difference of us leaving the room...