Crazy Cow Cafe & Bakery — Restaurant in Victoria

It's a shame I didn't listen to my partner when he warned me against buying pies here. He had twice previously and said they were terrible. But when I went in, the pies looked absolutely lovely. The tops anyway. After purchasing a cheese and bacon pie with some small cakes for an astronomical price, I found the base was almost completely raw and after breaking open the perfectly puffed flaky top pastry, I realised that underneath that was also raw. Photos attached. Not to be deterred, I dove into the inside with a fork. I'm not sure what meat the "mince" was, but it definitely wasn't the texture/color/flavour of any pok/beef/lamb/chicken mince I've ever eaten and it wasn't pleasant. It reminded me of offal. Although it was fairly salty gravy, it was also very lacking in flavour except for an underlying unpleasant taste that I couldn't place. The "bacon" are the chopped processed pink meat and the cheese was a cheap thin pre-made cheese sauce that was watery and bland. There was real cheese on top of the pie, so I kinda assumed it would contain the same. The cakes were nice, though not fresh at all and definitely not worth $7.50 for half the size everywhere else sells for $5 or less. So bad. I wish I'd gone to the other bakery down the road after reading...

The Crazy Cow Cafe and Bakery, simikar to other reviews given here unfortunately, misses the mark in almost every way, making for an extremely disappointing experience. Despite its prime location and the potential charm of its spacious cafe area, the execution falls flat, leaving much to be desired.

The service was abysmal. Not only was the staff unfriendly—lacking even a basic smile—but they were also slow and inattentive, taking far too long to note down a simple order. This lack of warmth and efficiency set a poor tone for the visit.

The coffee, however, was the true lowlight. Served at a scalding temperature, it was so hot that it left blisters in my mouth—a dangerous and completely unacceptable mistake. To make matters worse, the flavor was bitter and unpleasant, leaving a lingering taste that further soured the experience.

It's a real shame, as the cafe's spacious layout and location suggest it has the potential to be a standout destination. Instead, it falls short in almost every way. With improvements to their service and attention to detail in their food and beverages, the Crazy Cow Cafe and Bakery could truly shine. For now, though, it’s hard...

Just stopped in on our way back from Dinner Plain. It was a total fail. Pastry on the sausage roll wasn’t cooked properly, coffee was a bit ordinary. The pink lamington was inedible the sponge was hard like a biscuit and the imitation cream inside was hideous. One person serving with people lined up while two staff were chatting at the coffee machine. Hot dog was okay but the roll was soggy and the toppings (bacon, onion and cheese) were of poor quality and over priced at $9.80. $30.40 for 1 coffee, 1 sausage roll and 1 hotdog. The best thing about this place was some wood burned item’s that were reasonably priced and quite well done. They were hidden at floor level in a dingy corner, such a shame. To top it off I questioned the total of my order, receipt showed an extra $6.00 for something I didn’t order or receive. Overall very dodgy and...