ROBINSON ESQUINZO PLAYA — Hotel in Pájara

Every German we spoke to loved their holiday.||Positives: The grounds are stunning and the views spectacular. The staff are kind and friendly. It is well organised and very trusting, you can help yourself to drinks, wine and bottles of water are in the fridge for you and soft drinks and beer on tap. The cocktails were very good. My daughter enjoyed the tennis courts, there are rackets available but it’s €18 for balls. The quality of food was very good.||Negatives: the rooms are tired with no air con, only 1 socket by one side of the bed and lots of mosquitos. Take a long extension cord and plenty of repellant. The hotel is not walking distance to anywhere, you need to take a taxi to the town €15 incl. tip each way. The dine around restaurants were all chargeable, not even 1 night as part of the package and €35 each without drinks which were also excluded from the all inclusive package at these restaurants.||Know before you go: This is a German hotel chain - like butlins abroad. All activities are in German, including the entertainment and sports. To advertise the hotel as TUI do is wrong.||Dinning is a communal experience with lots of large tables. You have to ask people if you can join them. This is not culturally the norm in the UK and actually quite stressful. ||The hotel looks next to the beach, but is on a cliff top and so the trek down and then back up is hard. When you get there you discover it’s a nudist beach. My teenage daughter was horrified and did not want to go anywhere near the water sport centre down there. TUI state this is how all beaches are in Spain, but we visited others on the island and none had old men swinging their bits walking along the shore line like this one did.||Culturally Germans have less of a problem with nudity than Brits. Guests were naked on their terrace even though many people walk past. Guests would change costumes at the pool side without being covered up. People were walking around naked in the spa and gym - which is over 16 only.||Do not book a massage. I did, the young lad was clearly not a trained masseuse, the room overlooked the sea and public footpath and had windows around the whole circumference looking over the spa pool and bar and hotel exit to the beach. Not at all relaxing! ||We walked on average 10,000 steps a day up and down hill just getting from our room to the restaurant, bar and pool! Do download the app and pre-select a room, suggest in block Tenerife. Do not book if you have mobility or fitness problems.||I have written to TUI and asked them to update their web descriptions for this hotel - they basically denied there was any issue so I doubt they will. But it is not as you expect from their words.|The local team came to apologise and brought some gifts which was very kind of them. It isn’t the hotel that is the issue, it is TUI representing this as a place for UK families that...

Every German we spoke to loved their holiday.

Positives: The grounds are stunning and the views spectacular. The staff are kind and friendly. It is well organised and very trusting, you can help yourself to drinks, wine and bottles of water are in the fridge for you and soft drinks and beer on tap. The cocktails were very good. My daughter enjoyed the tennis courts, there are rackets available but it’s €18 for balls. The quality of food was very good.

Negatives: the rooms are tired with no air con, only 1 socket by one side of the bed and lots of mosquitos. Take a long extension cord and plenty of repellant. The hotel is not walking distance to anywhere, you need to take a taxi to the town €15 incl. tip each way. The dine around restaurants were all chargeable, not even 1 night as part of the package and €35 each without drinks which were also excluded from the all inclusive package at these restaurants.

Know before you go: This is a German hotel chain - like butlins abroad. All activities are in German, including the entertainment and sports. To advertise the hotel as TUI do is wrong.

Dinning is a communal experience with lots of large tables. You have to ask people if you can join them. This is not culturally the norm in the UK and actually quite stressful.

The hotel looks next to the beach, but is on a cliff top and so the trek down and then back up is hard. When you get there you discover it’s a nudist beach. My teenage daughter was horrified and did not want to go anywhere near the water sport centre down there. TUI state this is how all beaches are in Spain, but we visited others on the island and none had old men swinging their bits walking along the shore line like this one did.

Culturally Germans have less of a problem with nudity than Brits. Guests were naked on their terrace even though many people walk past. Guests would change costumes at the pool side without being covered up. People were walking around naked in the spa and gym - which is over 16 only.

Do not book a massage. I did, the young lad was clearly not a trained masseuse, the room overlooked the sea and public footpath and had windows around the whole circumference looking over the spa pool and bar and hotel exit to the beach. Not at all relaxing!

We walked on average 10,000 steps a day up and down hill just getting from our room to the restaurant, bar and pool! Do download the app and pre-select a room, suggest in block Tenerife. Do not book if you have mobility or fitness problems.

I have written to TUI and asked them to update their web descriptions for this hotel - they basically denied there was any issue so I doubt they will. But it is not as you expect from their words. The local team came to apologise and brought some gifts which was very kind of them. It isn’t the hotel that is the issue, it is TUI representing this as a place for UK families that...

Reception: Dealt with an older chap called Bill and a young woman called Alina. Both really helpful and very friendly. Enthusiastic, positive, can do attitude.||Rooms: No air conditioning, very tired looking with paint chipping from walls and window frames. Disappointed that there was not an English language channel on the TV to help keep up with events at home. However although the rooms were dated they were clean. ||Pools: Loungers freely available, pools clean and not overly crowded with the exception being the area reserved for over sixteens. This was very busy.||Restaurants: We only ate in the main restaurant; fully exclusive but expected to pay extra to use other dining areas. |The main restaurant was a buffet set up, the food was varied and generally very good quality. The same cannot be said for the all inclusive wine. ||The restaurant tables seem to be for sharing and while not usual for Brits, we had no issue with this and many of the people we shared a table with, including two staff members (Lisa and Marie) were friendly and spoke very good English. ||Bars: Some of the Spanish bar staff appeared to be intentionally making it difficult to order from them. Possibly their attempt at joining the anti-tourism protests that have been widely reported on at home in the UK. ||Germans! Yes this hotel is geared up for German speakers but we accidentally ended up taking part in an afternoon quiz and surprisingly (as non German speakers) got a couple of questions right. We took part in some other activities and managed fine. Another British couple that did not speak German also said they were having a great time. ||Noise! |Perhaps the location of our room F305 but we were disturbed a lot. |Noise from the evening entertainment until late night, then people retuning to their rooms between midnight and around 01:30. Then woken against around 06:15 by staff talking and moving carts around. |We were also disturbed by noise from other rooms and balconies. ||Gym: Looked good but did not use it; lack of air-con, busy and too tired from disrupted sleep. ||Massage: I would like to think they were qualified and again, it may be due to a language barrier but it felt awkward and I had the impression they were not experienced. ||I’m looking forward to getting home, having a good nights sleep, having a decent workout and a proper sports massage. ||Due to the positive interactions with a handful of the Robinson team, we may visit Robinson hotels again but not this one. ||Any British parents wanting a holiday in the sun and give their kids an opportunity to practice German, Robinson may well be the answer but pick a...