Jaanchie's Restaurant — Restaurant in Curaçao

Jaanchie's is a colorful and flavourful dining establishment in Westpunt (the Western end of the Curaçao island) that has been in business and run by the same family for almost 75 years. It's known for its unusual no-menu business model: the owner (whose name is Jaanchie and who looks about 70-ish, with the distinguished face and charming mannerisms of a retired theatre actor) walks over to your table, greets you, pulls up a chair, sits down, engages you in smalltalk (Where are you from? Ontario? Oooh, cold!) and then proceeds to enumerate the dishes du jour. At no point in the friendly conversation are prices ever mentioned, and one gets a distinct feeling that asking how much each dish costs might be an insult to the dignity of the host.

Jaanchie's is popular with vacationing tourists but also recommended by expats living on the island as a place that serves authentic Curaçao cuisine. I noticed a few locals among the diners which is always a sure sign that the place is not phony but in fact serves local food.

We ended up ordering a goat stew, breaded shrimp, two different fish dishes, a beer for me and ice teas for the kids. Everything was quite good, and portion sizes were just right. Afterwards, we also got an unexpected surprise in the form of complementary peanut flavoured ice cream (nobody bothered to inquire us about peanut allergy which, luckily, none of us has). In the end, the price for our food was quite reasonable at US$88 (tax included, a 10% tip extra).

Another feature of this restaurant are the bird feeders on the terrace that attract flocks of noisy and fidgety little yellow-and-black birds locals call "sugar thieves." The feeders are kept stocked with granulated white sugar which these birds (and a few other bigger species that periodically joined the fray) apparently can't get enough of. I can't imagine it being very good for the birds' health, but such sugary bird feeders appear to be...

Tourist trap with terrible food and service.

First thing I noticed when walking in was that there were no locals eating here. The staff also took a long time to seat us despite half the tables being empty. The other red flag were some empty tables near us still had dirty dishes and remained this way throughout our meal.

We did ask for a menu. However, the owner sits at your table to explain the menu because it’s all in his head. It is not that difficult to display a chalkboard menu, even if the menu changes, and this is a red flag no matter where you’re traveling because that means they can change their prices however they want.

The food itself is probably some of the worst food I’ve ever had. The grouper fish was dry on the outside and mushy and slimy on the inside and clearly had been frozen. Other restaurants on the island we went to do fresh fish/catch of the day. The beef stew was tough, and the rice was cold and hard - signs that this was also probably frozen. The bill at the end was too high for the meal.

There were hundreds of birds feeding outside the window, but you can see them all over the island, and there’s no way constantly feeding them pounds of sugar is good for them.

I also saw some ads for tour companies while paying, and it clicked in my mind that this restaurant has the same vibes as the ones that tour companies drop you off at where the food is pretty bad and...

If you’re in Westpunt, this is THE place to eat. Not a quick bite, this is the place for a nice long lunch where you can take your time to savor a delicious local meal and take in the charming ambiance.

Upon being seated next to the open garden, the owner put some sugar in the bird feeder and while we enjoyed a drink the birds were happily flocking in and giving a nice show. While we watched, he pulled up a chair and personally engaged us to discuss the offerings. No menu, rather a friendly personable conversation of what’s available and what we might enjoy. A welcome change from the norm!

We got the fillet of grouper and garlic shrimp. Both quite excellent! I couldn’t decide on a side, so he brought me a little bit of everything. And every bite was as delicious as the last!

We will definitely be going back during our stay, and next time I’ll be more adventurous and try the iguana!

Update... we’ve been back 3 times now, and yeah, it’s that good. Tried the iguana, stewed, and it’s delicious! A bit boney, so you gotta be into finger food (kinda like tiny ribs) but oh boy is it delicious. Truly tastes like chicken. No joke. They say frog legs taste like chicken... I disagree, but iguana actually really does! You won’t be disappointed...