Costa Coffee — Restaurant in Milton Keynes

Never had such ridiculous service in my life - now sat here nursing a burn and my car is caked in coffee.

So I used the drive thru this morning and when the barista handed me the drink, he advised the lid was not on properly whilst the drink was mid air - queue piping hot coffee spilling all over my car and hand!

After screaming in excruciating pain, the barista kept advising it was an accident - no apology or offer of first aid; in fact he asked me what I wanted him to do?!

I asked for a compress to treat my hand to which I was told they do not have any, but could instead have some tissues - again, not exactly helpful.

I insisted on speaking to a manager whom five minutes later told me, she had put the lids on correctly and was mistaken. My girlfriend pointed out she had watched it all to which the story changed to - well I only made one drink. Great sense of integrity…

This is now 10 minutes since getting scolded and no one has yet offered any first aid. The manager was rude, aggressive and more concerned with protecting the image than either my hand or car.

Around 15 minutes later I got a cold compress and insisted on filling in the accident log - the manager actually sent out a trainee to do it... Common theme right here…

Long story short, the staff here have zero awareness of any sort of health and safety protocol and it’s just a matter of time before someone else is hurt. Have complained to Costa HQ as my car will need a deep clean, so let’s see...

Ahoy, ye landlubbers! Gather 'round for the tale of me perilous venture into the strange port they call Costa Coffee!As I swaggered through the doors, the aroma hit me nostrils like a cannonball. "Shiver me timbers!" I bellowed, "What manner of brew be this?"A young swabbie behind the counter eyed me warily. "Welcome to Costa. Can I take your order?""Aye, ye can!" I growled, "Bring me yer strongest black brew, and make it snappy!"The wench looked bewildered. "Um, do you mean an Americano?""Americano?" I scoffed, "Sounds like fancy foreign nonsense. Just give me coffee blacker than the Jolly Roger!"

Spyin' the strange contraption they used, I exclaimed, "Blimey! Is that some kind of newfangled cannon?"

When me drink arrived, I eyed it suspiciously. "What be this tiny vessel? Where be the rest of it?"

"That's a regular size, sir. Would you like a larger one?""Aye!" I roared, "Bring me a tankard fit for a pirate king!"

As I enjoyed me brew, I noticed other patrons tapping on glowing rectangles. "By the powers!" I muttered, "Have they all been bewitched?"

In the end, I left with a belly full of the strongest brew this side of the seven seas. "Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum! These modern coffee houses be stranger than any uncharted island I ever did see!""Arrr! May yer mug be full and yer sea legs steady after drinkin' this...

Asked manager who was serving me for dome tops which I have on every visit as I am a regular customer. Was told not if no cream . I said I need them but was given attitude not service . We had a few words where the issue was Karenised to make me wrong for asking for a different lid . I was told to leave no refund !payment on app so can't cancel . I asked for help to cancel but told me to leave . Then said will make coffee and proceeded to get me to repeat dome tops multiple times . I said you know what I want . Then told not serving me . I said I am recording her she then took picture and called police 🤔 When the police arrived they couldn't believe over coffee lids . Watch out for Lisa the manager she only managed to look ridiculous 😔 update 3days later took payment for drinks not recieved as had to be cancelled at till . No refund no...