Kuhnhenn Brewing Company — Restaurant in Clinton Township

Up front note: this review is only in regards to the food. I've heard that the beer is very good, but I've never had it so I cannot speak to that.

Kuhnhenn has, unfortunately, served the worst food I have ever been served in a restaurant. Mid-day today (a Saturday), I had ordered the Philly Steak Sub - roast beef with grilled onions and peppers topped with beer cheese, all atop a hoagie roll, with an upgraded side of fries. Over an hour later once the "food" had actually arrived, what I was met with was not a steak sub, but rather something from one of Gordon Ramsey's nightmares.

The hoagie lead the affair with a promising start; toasted but still soft so it would absorb moisture. And everything spiraled down in a fireball from there. The vegetation atop the sandwich, while cooked well, was done so with exponentially more oil than was necessary, resulting in a sloppy, flavorless mess. The beer cheese was cold and, sans the saltiness, was essentially flavorless. Finally, the damning coup de grace - the "roast beef", if it can still be called such - was actually simply cold deli "meat" that had been sliced into strips and sprinkled into the bun. Worse still, the product used was of such low quality that I can only guess that it was in actuality a congealed mass of fat, preservatives, flavorings, and the minimum necessary beef content to be refereed to as meat. The upgraded side of fries were not inherently bad, would they have actually been hot or even warm. Alas, however, that was not the temperature of the product we were served.

This did not seem to be an unfortunate luck-of-the-draw, either, as other members of my party met similar fates. The other person who had ordered a cheese steak received an item of equal disappointment, and so too did the person who ordered the french dip (literally hoagie and deli slices), and the brisket was a similar cold mass of mystery meat slathered in sauce.

The saddest part is that this food was served by an understaffed house who seemed to have thought that this quality of food was acceptable or were at least indifferent to twisted faces of their patrons when presenting the grotesque offerings, let alone when many dishes were asked to be taken back.

While I, again, cannot speak to the quality of their drinks, I would highly suggest eating elsewhere before stopping...

Summary: Very good food and alcohol, but very poor service with a large party on trivia night, even with a reservation. I imagine it could be a great place to go with a smaller group (less than 8) and/or on a normal night, but I'll shy away on busy nights or with large parties.

Detailed Experience: I went with a group of about 16 and we had a reservation. We called in weeks prior and they had agreed to let us bring our dogs and eat outside for our specific event which was cool, but we ultimately weren't able because of poor weather.

We got there and they took drink orders for a long time. Trivia started shortly after we got there and it ended up taking a while to get what your ordered.

I have a preference for sweet drinks and that had a wide variety of wines and beers to suit my desires. They had some more typical drinks as well that I didn't venture into.

Now the service started to be poor (despite the good drinks).

Eventually they took our orders after at least 45 minutes, and it then proceeded to take a good deal longer to get food, probably about 45 minutes. Then when they began bringing food out they didn't bring a 3rd of it! People eventually asked and were told things were being plated and it still didn't show up. Eventually some one just cancelled their order because they had to leave for another event and we found out later that they apparently cancelled all the remaining orders that weren't served then. They ended up resolving things after about 1.5 hours, adjusting bills and discounting some things I believe, but it was still very poor service, especially since they knew we were coming and that they'd also have trivia night.

On the bright side, the food was very good. I was very pleased with the black bean burger and chips they served, and also enjoyed some appetizer bread some others had ordered. Every one around me seemed to enjoy the food they did eventually get. They don't lose any points for me for their food and drink.

Over 3 hours later, we were all able to leave without being totally pissed off because at least the food was good, we were with friends, and they eventually worked to resolve the issues they caused. I imagine they could door better on a different night with fewer people, but they don't get a good rating overall if they can't also serve a larger crowd they...

Disappointing.

TL;DR: whoever is running the front of the house shouldn't be. If you come for the beer, get food elsewhere.

Pros: -The beers they had were great. -The duck fat fries were actually duck fat fries. Yummy.

Cons: Let's start with the front of house.

They had at least two, maybe three different sets of menus.

There is no beer board, so there's no way of knowing if what you want is available until you ask for it.

Drink orders were taken within 10 minutes of arrival. Drinks started getting poured 15 minutes after that. It took at least 25 minutes for most of us to receive drinks in a half-full establishment with 2 bartenders and 2 sets of taps. One member of the party waited 35 minutes for his flight...which is when our food order was taken.

A full hour after we arrived, most of our food was served. 25 minutes after we were done eating, our other two entrees (All ordered at the same time) arrived. 30 minutes later, our checks started to roll in. Most of us were so eager to leave, we didn't really care what was on our checks, but the bills we received did not match the post-payment receipts after cards were run. -They were mostly right, but they were different.

Back of house: To quote JayZ, this kitchen "...couldn't crush a grape in a fruit fight."

Fish and chips, not as described on whichever menu I was looking at. Fish: Pre battered, out of a bag. Coleslaw: Out of a bag. Tartar sauce: Bag.

We were a nine top on a Friday night at 6: 30 PM. There was no scrambling to push tables together. They appeared to be ready for parties...