Roscoe's — Restaurant in Portland

Nice place, horrid food. Three stars as a result. Bar is nice. Service is nice. Atmosphere is nice. Nice bar! Just don't eat here. Our table ordered the Caprese Mac and the Spicy Mac, but we got two orders of the worst mac and cheese we have ever had the displeasure of tasting. My companion and I hardly touched our food. It was AWFUL.

The Caprese mac is stated as "pasta tossed in mozzarella and pesto cheese sauce. Topped with fried green tomatoes." What I got was overcooked pasta tossed in flavorless flour sauce with specks of green, and was topped with a 1/16" slice of fried ripe RED tomato. It was absolutely horrible, I'm guessing they don't actually use any degree of actual cheese, or roux was never salted as it was developed. I took the whole thing home to try and fix it, but I'm not sure it's worth saving.

Meanwhile the Spicy Mac is listed as "Just like our regular Mac but with hot-pepper oil and jalapeños. This is SPICY!" I suppose that if eating Kraft Chipotle Mayo counts as spicy to you, you might feel like this mac has a kick. However, you are unlikely to feel like this mac has flavor, regardless of your scoville tolerance. Just as bland, with no sense of savory rich cheese, as the other one. Definitely not worth the money.

Would come here for drinks, would never order food past...

Unbeatable happy hour when you factor in sushi from miyamoto next door, and it's 7 days a week.

Edit: OK, I've been coming here for 9 years now, and there's a lot of reasons this place is a winner. First, it's a beer lover's paradise. Taps rotate FREQUENTLY and they get all of the best stuff plus keep bringing attention to local quality. I've had pliny, founders kbs (!!!), numerous offerings from Bell's and Great Lakes... I could go on and on just about the beer. They do a good gumbo and other Cajun offerings. Is it as fire as what you'd get in Louisiana? Of course not, but neither is the Cajun I got next door in Texas. Hop a plane, go to a crawfish boil already, and keep your expectations of regional specialties outside of the region reasonable. As I stated before, the sushi is great and also the most reasonably priced I've found for the quality.

But the real reason I keep coming back with other teacher colleagues is the staff. Angelina, Kale, Tripp, Ellie, Joe, and others are always stellar examples of humanity. If I missed your name, dear roscoe's staff, I apologize. I'm picturing you, but my memory isn't what it was after 9 years of...

Don't bring a dog here anymore. Instead of just telling me that dogs weren't allowed inside ahead of time I was allowed to order a beer and then the manager came over and demanded to know the status of my dog. I panicked and said she was wherever she needed to be, and then took my beer outside. He was then IRATE when I paid and accused me of lying about my dog when I took it outside after he told me the rule.

I was very uncomfortable, and made a joke about my dog in an attempt to diffuse the situation. In reaction, the manager acted childish, and went "on break" when I asked to speak to him. He had already gossiped about our interaction and the server that spoke to me in his place had a lot of false information and assumptions that he provided. Super unprofessional.

I had my dog outside before I had one sip of beer, and it was completely unclear where I would order or get service without going inside.

The manager clearly has a lot of trauma and treats every person who mistakenly brings their dog inside like some kind of intentional criminal, even if you had no idea their policy...