Hungry Jack's Burgers Chirnside Park — Restaurant in Melbourne

Throughout history, amidst trials and tribulations, Earth’s most gifted souls have shaped our world with their profound influences: Da Vinci’s Mona Lisa, Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata, and, undeniably, Jack Cowin’s Hungry Jack’s.

Yes, I mean what I said, Canadian-Australian businessman and entrepreneur, Jack Cowin’s Hungry Jack’s.

Now, dear reader, who I shall address as ‘my good friend’ (or not, I don’t really know how far into our friendship we are), you might be wondering, scrolling endlessly through these reviews, who am I to judge such fast food quality cuisine, to the likes of the ‘Mona Lisa’ and ‘Moonlight Sonata’?

Well, I tell you, my good friend, and I tell you now, that Chirnside Hungry Jack’s is not just mere 𝙛𝙤𝙤𝙙, but it is 𝙖𝙧𝙩.

My good friend, the moment your body enters and connects inside the kingdom of Hungry Jack’s, the wave of relief showers over you, like a wandering traveller, seeking shelter for the night, as if you have been blessed by being drenched in warm, soft Manuka honey.

Behold the Whopper at Hungry Jack’s, a marvel of fast-food artistry that even Picasso would trade in his brush for a spatula just to create. Now, my good friend, this burger is not just a meal; it’s a culinary masterpiece that looks like it was meticulously crafted by a gourmet grand magician from the likes of Romania. The bun is a perfect golden hue, like it’s been kissed by the sun itself, and the layers of beef, lettuce, tomato, and cheese are arranged with such precision, even the Mythbusters would need a whole episode to uncover the secrets behind its perfect symmetry and deliciousness.

The fries? So golden it’ll make King Midas jealous. With every crispy, golden crunch, they seem to speak directly to your soul, as if they're rewarding you for all those tough days and reminding you that in this moment, my good friend, it's perfectly okay to savour every bite and let your taste buds revel in pure, unadulterated bliss, as if whispering to you “it’s okay, you deserve this, indulge”.

I rate this culinary masterpiece 5 stars, because anything more, I’ll be naming my firstborn ‘Whopper’. A standing ovation, with a bouquet of flowers after such a magnificent performance is what this Hungry Jack’s needs. If I appreciate such elegance of what Hungry Jack’s provides, then watch out, because my good friend, The Louvre has a fierce competitor for ‘the greatest art to ever exist,’ and it’s not a masterpiece of paint and canvas, or a resonance of harmony within a Sonata, but a masterpiece of flame-grilled perfection and...

I ordered a Mexican Whopper meal. It was technically not cold, but it just seemed barely warm. It left quite a bit of sauce on my hands and lettuce in the box.

The restaurant itself has changed looks. There used to be more seating near the counter. Said seating has gone. The AC appears to have been turned up full bore, the printed menu near the counter had vanished and to top it all off, the screens showing pay tv had vanished. Since the last time I was there, they have sacrificed an entire wall of booths to have a dedicated window for delivery drivers. There's now a wood panelled area in place of the windows that seems to serve no purpose, as the kitchen has remained the same size, yet the new area appears to be part of the kitchen.

It's almost as if they don't want you to linger around and instead, leave once you have your food in hand. Why bother having...

I went here with my boyfriend for the first time tonight. I ordered the Double Whopper with cheese.

It's so much more than "just a burger." I mean...that first bite—oh, what heaven that first bite is. The bun, like a sesame freckled breast of an angel, resting gently on the ketchup and mustard below, flavors mingling in a seductive pas de deux. And then...a pickle! The most playful little pickle! Then a slice of tomato, a leaf of lettuce and a... a patty of ground beef so exquisite, swirling in your mouth, breaking apart, and combining again in a fugue of sweets and savor so delightful.

This is no mere sandwich of grilled meat and toasted bread. This is God, speaking to us in food.

Eat here, my friends. You will not be...