Costa Coffee — Restaurant in Dunfermline

Ah, Costa Coffee. The great British bastion of caffeine mediocrity. Like a warm hug from someone you don’t particularly like, but who did remember your birthday. You walk in, and the smell hits you—not of freshly ground arabica—but of hot milk, sugar syrup, and the sort of coffee that seems to have been brewed while someone thought about espresso from the next room.

Atmosphere: Imagine if IKEA had a baby with a motorway service station. There are wood panels, there are red accents, and there’s always one person in a corner charging their Nokia from 2007. The music is loud enough to make you question your life choices, but not loud enough to drown out the hiss of a steam wand operated by a 17-year-old who may or may not be on their third shift this week.

The Coffee: I ordered a flat white, and what I received was a latte with commitment issues. The milk texture was... enthusiastic. Latte art? Yes, technically. It had a blob. Was it a heart? A mushroom? The ghost of a tulip? We may never know. The espresso itself had flavor notes of “sort of coffee,” “burnt optimism,” and “regret with a hint of caramel.”

I asked what beans they used and was told, “Oh, it’s just our blend.” Which I assume means they gathered every bean that failed a QC test and gave it a uniform and a name badge.

Food: I ordered a “toastie” which, in true Costa fashion, arrived hotter than the sun’s surface and then went cold faster than my enthusiasm. It tasted vaguely of cheese, ham, and despair. The brownie, however, was decent—like a hug from someone who smells like chocolate and poor decisions.

Conclusion: Costa is not for the coffee aficionado. It’s for your nan, your exhausted commuter, or your friend who thinks Nescafé Gold Blend is “a bit fancy.” But there’s something charming about its utter refusal to be exceptional. It’s consistent. It’s reliable. It’s the “Ford Focus” of coffee chains. And in a world of uncertainty, sometimes that’s all you really want: a hot drink, a dry sandwich, and a place to sit where no one will judge you for crying into a muffin.

Final Verdict: 3 out of 5 stars. Would I go back? Not willingly. But I probably will. Because I’m British. And...

I love my costa been going for years and they have never let me down went today as it was on my way to work. So I went with a happy smile said Hello no reply at all infact in return I got this weird look it was like the girl at the counter never seen a brown person before I asked for a tea pot and she pretend as if no one ever asked for a tea pot and gave me pot with hot water inside when I said I asked for a tea pot she said but u didn't say u want tea which was very stupid as I've been going to costa for many many years and always order a tea pot and get a tea pot in return she started arguing with me the other lady then gave me what I've asked for. I went sat on down with my order and heard the same lady talking to her colleagues talking about me 😐 I know the name of that lady but I won't mention it here as I'm going to email the head office of costa she made me feel very uncomfortable and I won't be going to that branch anymore. Costa plz train your staff to be more friendly not just towards Scottish and English people but...

Really disappointed, I use this Costa frequently when I commute. However not sure I’ll be back. On the 24/11/22 I stopped for coffee and plant based cheese and ham toastie at the drive thru. Unfortunately I took a bite once I was on my journey and it was a meat and cheese toastie I was given. I had an anaphylactic attack due to the milk which could have been a lot worse had I eaten the whole thing. I think in future servers should double check if unsure, As there are many reasons individuals need diary free! This Costa is also grossly understaffed which could be why mistakes are often made if you look at reviews below. It’s abhorrent that this Costa franchise places their profits above their customers, but more importantly above their employees workload and mental well-being. I want to progress this complaint further, please inform how...