Beach House — Restaurant in England

Went here for a quick lunch with the family.

The decor inside is tacky, with plastic-clad walls displaying surfboards and shells, among other things. Its obvious intention is to be exciting, which is totally fair, but I question the execution and it ended up feeling like we were sat in SpongeBob's house (not the worst thing in the world, if that's what you desire).

Our table (and most others) was situated near the toilets, which sadly had a thin, western-style door with gaps above and beneath This meant the meal was interspersed with the offensive boom of a hand-dryer, as well as a hardly noticeable though underlying toilet-cleaner-like stench.

The food was pretty poor, characterised by Walburtons seeded bread and Heinz chicken-soup, as well as slightly old tomatoes and wet lettuce. When we asked the waitress over the soup's freshness, lied to us and told us it was fresh whilst running away before we could challenge her again (it was obviously Heinz, we've had that soup many times).

More on the service: we had one very good man, a younger lady who was kind, and a lady who was less receptive and at points rude (the very lady who lied about the soup). 2010's greatest hits were pervading the establishment at full volume, and as one of us have APD, a hearing-disorder triggered by loud and consistent noises, we asked them to turn it down, to which the waitress obliged. We couldn't notice a difference, and so we asked again, to which the waitress gave a moody "uh" and a grimaced expression, eventually obliging once more. It then got to a more reasonable level, though still was still a bit of an annoyance.

Overall not a very nice experience.

EDIT: The response to this review is quite obviously and unreasonably malicious, hence the character of this establishment is shown and my point proven on the moody customer-service. Though, I must say, the tap water was delicious and the perfect...

Great little bar/cafe style eatery, with a good selection of cakes and lunch time snacks, great atmosphere, friendly staff. All food was cooked fresh after ordering.

I would expect the atmosphere to be equally as good on a night if just having a drink.

The only minor negative really and would have only liked to have knocked half a star off, was food order was a little slow to have been taken and arrived after ordering drinks - but all food was cooked fresh with an excellent tomato sauce to bacon ratio.

For sure will...

The girls booked this place for my hen party, there was 18 of us. They worked out a quick system to ensure everyone got drinks quickly. They brought out a drink with a sparkler in and popped on celebration by kool & the gang which really perked our little hungover group up. We honestly were so well looked after it, we've all been talking about how amazing it was. We will definitely be visiting next time we are in the area. Thank you so much for taking such...