New River Café — Restaurant in London

Starting off with the good: The eggs were nicely cooked and the bacon was cooked with enough crisp to disguise the cheap quality to show the chef has some skills.

The rest: £8 for a breakfast of sausage, bacon, eggs OR tomato, bread and tea OR coffee sounds expensive, but is unfortunately actually quite competitive for the area, so I can't fault them for standard capitalism, it's what drives competition.

However, there's two things non-negotiable that you include with a breakfast you charge 8 quid for, and that's a) a cheery demeanour from the front of house staff who can at least pretend to be pleased to take your money and b) toast. When you grumpily demand a whole pound extra to heat up the bread that's already included in an 8 pound breakfast, you just come across as scummy. Every other place charging the same amount offers toast as standard, bread instead for those who want and fried bread at a bit extra.

The front of house wish they were anywhere else. It's not the normal Eastern-European abruptness which can seem cold to British people but actually serves a purpose of getting to the point quickly and the lack of pleases and thank yous are replaced with genuine warm smiles - these two have an actual disdain for everyone who enters the cafe. One customer I saw on leaving tried to engage the male staff member who was angrily wiping a table with a goodbye and thank you and the grimace the waiter forced in place of a smile dropped the instant the customer's back had turned out the door.

The blonde lady is in charge of shouting at you if you sit in the wrong seat, and I suppose probably also responsible for the numerous signs telling you what you can't do, although I can't prove that and wouldn't attest to it in a court of law. Those signs do however exist, and she seems to take pleasure in telling people what they can't do, so I'm just putting 2 and 2 together here.

It's generally an inhospitable and uninviting place, and for the rest of the day I will be working out what else I can spend the 1 whole pound I saved in not having the bread (which again, I'd already paid for) heated up....

I had an English breakfast which was alright for the price, but the pale slices of bread loaf were the worst ones I've ever had. When I ordered a cup of tea, was asked if I wanted milk, I said no (standard stuff, I thought), but then was "educated" by one of the male staff that when ordering tea in an ENGLISH cafe/restaurant, milk always comes with so I should tell them if i dont want it. Very weird choice of act, considering they already asked, making me feel uncomfortable. The vibe was odd, staff looked cold, making the food 10 times less enjoyable. My bad choice/luck to pick this one, considering I often get very good experience in cafés/restaurants...

don't eat out of that place The hygiene standards of this cafe is not very good, touch everything without gloves You've got miserable staff in that place specially the blonde person she looks so miserable she doesn't even look at you Go and look behind the counter it's disgusting and the kitchen have you seen the breakfast?What you get it's terrible i can walk down the road on church street there's a better cafe down there it's a turkish cafe and they're doing a lot better i would never buy food out of there the breakfasts are terrible you're asking ten...