Smokehouse — Restaurant in London

Dear Barry,

In response to you, thanks for taking the time out of your day to respond to my previous review that I actually found to be quite diplomatic based on my experiences.

Firstly, if you read all of the 1 and 2 star reviews on here you will note that almost 90% of them have issues with the service and if you believe that complaining about terrible service is an injustice to you, please try and do your job better.

I wasn't planning to divulge into the finer details of just how terrible the service was but since you asked for it, here goes -

When I visited a couple of weeks back, I booked the table for 10 people. Upon arrival we were given a table for 8 people! 8 people sat directly by the kitchen, on the hottest day of the year. The fact the table was so close to kitchen isn't the end of the world, and the fact it was the hottest day of the year is completely out of your control. We also take into account that we were a large group however, to be provided with a table with 2 less place settings after booking the table 2 weeks before is within your control and in my eyes, and others I dined with, pretty ridiculous. As you can imagine with an extra 2 people sat on the bench it wasn't a very comfortable. When I flagged this to the waitress she quite literally just shrugged her shoulders and replied "sorry" and then carried on with her day. No suggestions to add extra chairs or anything.

Drinks, these took so long to come to the table that we were having to get up and retrieve them from the bar ourselves.

We ordered a selection of starters, 4 out of 7 arrived. After waiting 45mins they were finally brought to the table and within minutes the roasts followed. With no space for anything on the table the waiter was removing people's plates from them whilst they were still trying to eat their starters!!!!! Roasts, we ordered 4 cauliflower cheese', which we asked 2 different waiters for. They were finally brought over when everyone had nearly finished their meals.

Desserts, the waitress decided to bring half of them over to the table and leave the other half waiting on the side for us all to watch. In the end we served them to ourselves!

When 10 dissatisfied guests politely flagged how disappointed we were with the service the waitress agreed that there had been some issues and removed the service charge (which we did not ask for). We still decided to pay the service which I now, deeply regret I would also like to highlight that since it was such a hot day the restaurant wasn't even particularly busy. Yesterday, as mentioned in my first review above, we were served by a waiter who now, I know to be "Barry". Barry, again, my friend ordered a juice, you brought her a pint? When she flagged this you kindly offered the pint on the house, thank you. She then waited 15mins for you to bring over the correct order. The food, 3 people out of a table of 6 requested cauliflower cheese and low and behold you didn't add them to our order. On 3 different occasions and from 3 different people, you missed that off the order, again!? When the table POLITELY requested them, whilst our roasts sat there going cold we were told they were NOT on the order and then 5 mins later we were presented with two bowls of what I believe you intended to be cauliflower cheese but was actually a bowl of milk with some raw cauliflower in. And again, just 2 bowls not the 3 that was ordered but I suppose it was so bad your incompetence did us a favour.

Now in the grand scheme of things, I'm not going to lose sleep over Cauliflower cheese gate but, I will offer you some advice based on my experiences and other reviews I have read. When people spend their hard earned money eating out and even more so with an establishment that charges £26 for a roast we expect at least a decent level of service to be provided. Unfortunately, Smoke house isn't making the cut. And don't worry, I can assure you, 16 people out of the guests I visited with have all agreed that based on the abhorrent service alone, they would never visit Smoke...

I've booked my birthday lunch with friends here and came by a couple of weeks before to check out the place. It's a gorgeous gastropub, great vibe, nice options for outside and inside, monthly special cocktails list etc. When I told th3 staff that I had a reservation in a a couple of weeks time, they looked it up and showed me my table (which I didnt ask for). All very nice and attentive so I was excited and thought we'd be looked after well and I will have a nice birthday celebration.

HOWEVER, when I arrived on Sunday, we were seated at a table which wasn't the one that I was told I'd get, it was right in the draft of the garden door, half the table was almost in the busy pathway for the staff eushing around so my friends had their jackets falling on the floor etc, it was very unpleasant. When I asked to me moved, I got an almost snappy response that they can't promise special tables and they will see if they can move us (I never even asked about which table to get in the first place, they just showed me back then, I assume now, it is just their show off table) Shorlty after, we were moved to another table (still not the one that I was shown, but ok) We ordered some beers, a bottle of wine and also cocktails (the latter was delicious) the wine was warm, the beer was good... We ordered various Sunday roasts to share and try between us.... now, let's start with the good firstly - the meat was delicious But that was it! The potatoes were stone cold, the Yorkshire puddings were burnt and cold, the veg was ok but so hot that we wondered if it came out of the microwave and the gravy was bland and just warm. We told them all this (weren't asked but had to grab the attention) and they cleared our plates and came back with another set of food and plenty of extra potatoes and veg, to make up for the bad quality, I assume. I think it was just reheated to be honest. The potatoes weren't nice, they were hotter but not nice, the Yorkshire pudding were still burnt..... And they brought so much food because they just made extras of everything (I would have preferred quality over quantity) We had a crumble at the end (delicious) to share between us 6 and I got a scoop of vanilla ice cream with 1 candle for my birthday from the staff.

On the bill they charged us for everything (even the crumble, all the drinks and dishes) despite the food not being great, which is just slightly disappointing. Overall very bad

The service did replace the cold food etc but it always also just seemed as an inconvenience to them

Sad...

Went for dinner with some friends last weekend.

The place wasn't incredibly busy (a couple of big tables, which we all know can be tricky, but apart from that nothing too out of the ordinary). Still, it took over 30 minutes for someone to come and get our order. First red flag, but the dinner hadn't started yet and we did not mind waiting.

We ordered a couple of starters, as we didn't want to overeat before the meat which was supposed to be the centrepiece of the dinner (it's a steak restaurant!). Nothing special about the starters, take it or leave it - apart from the tartare which contained a lot of low-quality mayo, something I hadn't seen anywhere else and that made it taste more like a meaty coleslaw than a tartare - definitely not what we were expecting.

We ordered some pretty expensive steaks (we knew the price in advance, not complaining about a bad surprise money-wise, but it's right to put things into perspective. This is not a cheap place). First off, we were informed that one of the two cuts we wanted was no longer available, so the board wasn't updated. Fine, it happens. The meat came, the cooking point was right. Big issue with the meat was that it was not aged at all, although it was clearly advertised as 64 days matured beef. Flavour was also completely absent. Texture was great, but one would think some taste was to be expected. Nope. If you're going for the aged beef and are prepared to pay for it, don't bother.

We had to order sides separately, which I also found strange - they normally come with the meat if you're paying that price.

Dessert selection was as bland as the meat. I tried the chocolate cheesecake which was I think 90% butter?

On the positive side, wines were very good (although it has to be said we ordered two bottles in the region of £100 per bottle, so I was expecting them to taste good).

If you're going for a quick bite, no-frills, pub-like experience, than maybe you'll enjoy this place. But for £140 per person you are far better off going for two dinners of £70 somewhere else, you'll get the same quality and experience but at least you'll get two...