China Town Super Buffet — Restaurant in Kansas City

Decent variety but the food was a little too lukewarm, cheap, and devoid of substance for a $20 meal. Host was very polite and friendly. Tex-Mex options were a nice distraction, though the “queso” was not from this planet, clearly unbound by the laws of fluid dynamics and reason. If that sounds like an overstatement, it’s not. The American food options that exist mostly for picky children are (and I don’t say this lightly) not even fit for American children. It’s like someone read a description in a book of what Americans eat and tried to recreate it without ever actually having tried the real thing. My ill-advised sampling of the mac n cheese and french fries in particular distilled in my mind the profound tragedy of our national identity - if this is what other cultures believe Americans eat and are made from, no claims of merit can affirm our self-styled exceptionalism, and any hopes for continued geopolitical dominance will only grow more untenable. As a midwest restaurant with a lot of Hispanic employees, perhaps they’d benefit from more employee input or involvement on their Mexican and Americana recipes, especially since these make up a large proportion of the offerings. Also, this sounds dark, but we must really all agree to keep the Japanese from discovering what has happened to sushi within these walls lest they become appalled enough to reinvade Manchuria. There was an olympic-sized swimming pool’s worth of sticky urinal runoff covering much of the bathroom floor and getting tracked around everywhere (and a stagnant bath of bleach-perfumed mop water covering the dining room floor, with an intriguingly mysterious indistinction between the end of the one and the start of the other) but this did not evoke within me the same questions of the plausibility of patriotism, just vivid memories of the underfoot sensations and palpable regret one experiences walking through an empty frat-house in the morning. For all the criticism, however, there are things I appreciate about this place: The apparent age of food on the buffet points to minimal food waste, which helps the environment. Carbon footprint must be low as well, as I can’t imagine people are traveling long distances to eat here. The food will surely strengthen one’s gut microbiome due to the diligence with which every dish besides ice cream, hot or cold, seems to be held within the magic range between 41 and 135 degrees. There is also an evidently untapped opportunity for local heath inspectors to practice their trade and better hone their craft. Despite giving a low rating today, I’d definitely return if I was planning a second or third date that l didn’t actually want to go on but lacked the spine to definitively call...

The place was packed, and we had to hunt for a table because none of the angry staff will seat you and they have no idea how many people are in the restaurant. We were never greeted, the guy just said "Two is 21.99!". There were kids running all over, and the Mexican music they were playing over the speakers was so loud you have to yell to talk. Our table (the only one we could find) was sticky, and so was the floor under it.

The food is pretty much all bland. Hardly anything tasted like it's supposed to. The orange chicken had no citrus flavor at all, and the breading was hard. Not crispy, hard. The sushi tasted like the fridge they stored it in, as do the cakes and deserts. The only things that weren't bland, or just plain gross, were the egg rolls and crawfish, and even those aren't worth the hassle of this place. Their "sweet tea" is a nasty powdered mix and tasted terrible. They have a taco bar that I didn't try because it's a Chinese buffet, and I came for Chinese food. They also have an entire section dedicated to "American food" that pretty much consists of chicken in various forms. The girl picking up plates spent more time standing around staring at her phone or chugging soda than cleaning anything.

Overall it was an awful experience. It's no wonder they make you pay as soon as you walk in the door. I'd imagine plenty of people wouldn't pay at all if they didn't. As I said, it was very busy, so it's obviously popular for some reason. If you like bland Chinese food with no flavor, and throwing elbows to get some shrimp, this is the place for you. If you want flavor and a less chaotic environment, and any modicum of customer service, literally anywhere else...

This place has sadly fallen from grace. Instead of the gentle Chinese atmospheric music, the new owners just play a Spotify list of Latino music. Sometimes other genres sneak in. While dining "Love the Way You Lie" by Eminem came on. The song was uncensored in a restaurant full of families with children. There was no attempt to make a change back to the setlist. The "Chinese" food was not properly made and even some recipes were modified to the owner's liking. Food was obviously prepared by inexperienced chefs. I found what appeared to be an eyelash caked in mascara in one of the food dishes. I tried the desert, and sadly the ice cream came out of the machine tasting as though a mechanic just got finished working on a car, came into the restaurant without washing their hands, and loaded the machine. There were no table waiters at all. No one provided any service other than to pay. To top it all off, they demand that you pay upfront before eating. With 6 people including a 4 and 10 year old, the total was 86.30. I totaled the bill to 90, and the hostess audibly complained that I only gave 3.70 in tip. 0/10 will never return. This restaurant needs put out...