Selkirk Pizza & Tap House — Restaurant in Washington

I normally do not write reviews but it this case I felt it necessary. I waited a week to write it as I needed time to cool down.

My wife and I enjoy Selkirk. We most always eat in the lounge unless our grandkids are with us. The lounge staff waits on you and does a great job! In the main seating area, you are required to wait in line to order food and drinks. If you want another drink, you must go back to the front, wait in line once again to place your order. You are given a # to take back to the table.

Tonight, it was me, my wife, adult daughter and G-daughter. My daughter received her and G-daughter's food in a reasonable amount of time. About 15-20 minutes after my daughter received her food, mine and my wife's had still not arrived. We see a young lady (later ID'd as Cali the manager) circling around the dining area with what appears to be our food. We try to get her attention but go unnoticed. She gives the food (our food) to a family seated nearby who look a bit confused but nonetheless proceed to enjoy it.

We eventually get Cali’s attention and ask about our food. Cali very rudely in a harsh tone told us the kitchen is backed up and our food would be coming. I was taken back at her unprofessional attitude and became upset. Several minutes later Cali comes to our table and states our order was complete, yet we never got our food. I pointed out that she gave our food to the other table. Cali then tries to lay blame on the male employee who took our order (did not get his name but he was great). This male confirmed that we did in fact order the pizza and soup. Instead of acknowledging the mistake, Cali continued with her ugly attitude. Cali informed they would refund our food order and complete a new order which at this point I asked for it to be boxed to go.

Not once did Cali apologize for the mistake. She continued with her rude behavior. I witnessed her interactions with other patrons and employees throughout our time there. She is a very arrogant and condescending person who has no business working hospitality. I would be very embarrassed having her represent my business. Never again will I take the kids here and risk being served by Cali in the main dining area. The wife and I have been married 34 years and dine out often. In all that time we have not once been treated so poorly.

We will continue to enjoy our visits in the lounge (4.5 starts for...

Decided to stop here for lunch with my 7 and 5 year old. We walk in and there is no one around. There seems to be some loud commotion and I spot it coming from a small dead end hallway that’s a small arcade type room. There is a cook over the counter and a little to the left that sees us standing there for about a minute, makes eye contact with me and all he does is ding a bell for an order up, no hello or even to tell me someone will be with me shortly. We wait another 3 minutes before a waiter comes up to us and asks if we’ve been there before. I tell her no and she nicely tells us to find a spot to sit and she will bring out menus. If you are a “seat yourself” establishment, nothing wrong with that but please put a sign somewhere saying that so customers stand there for no reason. We choose a booth next to the only other person I saw in the seating area. I then almost immediately regret my kids spot choice as the noise is evident, as there are about 9 kids from 10-16 age groups all hanging out in there being loud and goofing off. They brought lobby chairs in there are were just sitting in there being obnoxious. The waiter comes over decently quick and hands us the menus, takes our drink order and walks away. We make up our minds pretty quick and play on the kids menus games until she came back with our drinks a few minutes later but she goes to just walk away. I say we are ready to order too and she turns back around and takes our Order. Kids order a small pizza to split and I get the pesto calzone. Food came out pretty quick and looked great. We start eating and the breading was really good. The calzone started oozing a bit of the cheese and other ingredients, looking yummy and hot. I bite into the main part and it was just okay. I kept thinking the flavoring would get better but it was pretty bland with a light pesto flavor. The combination of ingredients just didn’t do the breading justice. The chicken was cut into cubes and tasted okay, but nothing stood out over the bread. Huge letdown from the first bite cause it never got any better. The pizza was pretty good, kids loved it. We never saw our waitress again until I asked if we paid up front when she took my plate 20 minutes later. The combination of lack of attentiveness from the staff, flavorless entree and their inability to provide an enjoyable atmosphere left me rather...

Let's be honest: Pizza is not fine dining. When I go to a pizza house, it's a time to lay back and just chill out with friends. I want to have a conversation, maybe catch the game and laugh with the guys.

That's not possible in the auditory war zone that is Selkirk Pizza & Tap House.

First thing when walking through the door, I enter a cramped little walkaway with less room than a maximum security, solitary confinement cell where I'm expected to stand and order. Oh, did I mention it is limited service? Not a bad thing, in fact it gives a loose air to the establishment. Still, the area where they have you order in is uncomfortable and I found myself rushed to order so as not to inconvenience the other sardin-ahem, people who were shoved into the waiting area.

The decor? Well, if you wish to dine in an abandoned lumber mill, then this is totally your place. The walls are brick and the ceiling has a combination of suspended metal doodads and wooden planks that are...just there. The room is neither fanciful nor is it an entirely industrial environment. I found myself confused as to whether I should be looking out for zombies clawing at me from underneath the tiny tables or actually choosing a place to sit.

When I did sit down, it was loud. Not crowded-concert-hall loud or listening-to-the-stereo-cranked-up-all-the-way loud, but like sitting-in-a-Brazilian-soccer-stadium-after-a-goal-is-made loud. I couldn't hear the people across from me when they tried to speak to me. Eventually, the seemingly-colloquial setting reduced us to quiet, munching patrons who were eagerly eyeing the exit. The eons of evolution that gave us human speech and language were dissolved in the chaotic environment that amplified everyone's noise besides my own.

The food was decent, thankfully. The pasta we ordered was excellently prepared. The nachos, while dry, came with plenty of toppings. The pizzas they had put on display at the front had appeared...aged, so we oped for sandwiches which came warmed and delightfully flavorful.

Sadly, that was all that was enjoyable, given that my party had to rely on hand signals and smoke signals to communicate. Small talk was not an option. The atmosphere was as confused as we were. Quite frankly, I wonder what exactly Selkirk Pizza & Tap House is trying to achieve with its...