Smitty's Cinema Topsham — Attraction in Topsham

Just went to go see Red One last night for my birthday, used to love Smitty’s, and I’ve got a preference of seats when I go, thankfully we got tickets online and we got to reserve them, sweet right? Except when we came into the theatre there was a whole group in the spots we picked out a day earlier, I talked to one of the women who seemed to be the most talkative and also apparently the most hammered out of them all and let her know that they were in our seats, I was polite about it and in a fuss she immediately started yelling “WERE NOT MOVING SIT SOMEWHERE ELSE” okay whatever, so we sit at one of the tables, chair was uncomfortable, no big deal, then the whole group of I don’t know 15 old women just started shouting at each other, every single one of them so loud talking about how they haven’t been that drunk in a while. Guy comes around and asks the whole theatre for their food order, and I mention to him about the seats and the women and he said he couldn’t do anything, pretty lame now, we didn’t get any food.

During the movie we paid to watch the women behind us wouldn’t shut up, and were all being so loud except for when the employee was present, for whatever reason when he came back to drop food off they were quiet as mice, we stuck it out because we paid for the tickets and that’d be a waste imo especially since the ticket price was so expensive, then in the beginning of our movie maybe idk 10-15 minutes in we could hear the movie from the next theatre over playing which made it difficult to hear ours, mixed with the cackling drunk witches behind us, overall an awful experience, and when we went to leave we were looking for an employee to complain to, and there was no one around, as if everyone had just disappeared, we looked for someone for maybe 10 minutes after the movie too, and even peaked in the other theaters to see maybe if we could flag someone down, worst movie experience I’ve ever had, and it just makes me so sad because I used to love going to smittys, and I wanted to go to one of my favorite places on my birthday.

Next time I guess we will just go to...

Where to begin?

This place is clearly a converted office building because there are no fixed seats. As in the seats are stained gaming chairs that wheel about on the chipped office tile. You are paired at a desk, unable to recline (gravity you see) as you stare down a beige corridor at the smallest screen I've ever personally attempted to watch a film. The sound quality was akin to the built-in speakers of a 98' Magnivox.

The viewing experience was that of a corporate PowerPoint presentation. It was as magical as an HR meeting. As charming as a yeast infection.

To that point, the chairs were coated in grease and snot from children running up and smearing their runny noses and pizza grease upon your headrest. At your elbow and in every direction are people eating microwave quality cheesesticks, and pizza, and every other manner of "food" slurping and flatulating and belching as you try to clean the stuffed Crayola fragments from the seams in your chair.

I felt like I needed a tetanus shot.

Please. Don't waste your money here. This will be the most disappointing film going experience of your life.

I can't imagine seeing star wars, or jurassic park, or the godfather in such a setting. Is there...

I had such an amazing experience at Smitty’s Cinema! From the moment I walked in, the staff went above and beyond to make sure everything was perfect. The service here honestly deserves five stars on its own. Our server was attentive without ever interrupting the movie, super friendly, and made sure our food and drinks came out quickly and exactly as we ordered. You can tell they really care about making the whole experience enjoyable.

What I really appreciated was how smooth the whole setup was. The servers delivered food quickly and quietly, so we never felt distracted from the movie. They checked in just enough to make sure we had everything we needed, but not so much that it interrupted the experience. That balance is hard to pull off, but they nailed it.

Between the excellent service, delicious food, and the comfortable theater setup, Smitty’s makes a simple night at the movies feel like a full night out. I’ll definitely be coming back, and I’d recommend it to anyone looking for a fun, relaxing, and memorable movie experience. This place deserves all the...