The Library Restaurant — Restaurant in Midland

I drive 3 hours/day to work in this community. I often work quite late, thus went to this restaurant on a Thursday night to get a good meal before my long drive home. I have two jobs and a child under 18. I am only 53 and I don't have dementia. The otherwise outstanding waitstaff began to use "elderspeak" on me, using a sing song voice, simple sentences, baby talk such as inappropriate terms of endearment calling me "my dear" and "dearie"; using "we" in slow simple sentences such as "do WE want more wine dearie"... I don't know if he wanted more wine, but I didn't finish my wine or my meal. When I told him my name and asked him to call me by name and explained that I still work and function; to his credit he did speak with me as an equal adult. However when I spoke of retiring in approx. 15years time, he did mention "the last few days of life"... I hope I'd still have another 5 or 10 years after the fateful event of retirement LOL....When I stayed at the hotel where the restaurant is located, I did notice some of the (other) clients are people with some grey hair. In fact, a male approx. my age was being served politely, and spoken to with normal sentences as an equal adult, so they can't say that they treat everyone the cruel way I was treated. So for the sake of their business, they might wish to educate their staff not to use "elderspeak" (esp. not to use it on older women while serving older men as equal people). Elderspeak is basically baby talk for older adults! I'm not in a nursing home yet LOL and even if I were, its not right!! I'm posting this review to help others be treated better than I was, I won't go back!! (see below)

Elderspeak: Babytalk Directed at Older Adults by Karen Austin, ChangingAging Contributor

[Editor’s Note: Originally posted at The Generation Above Me, poster's note: the "I" in the article is Ms. Austin", not the poster of the review)]

About a year after I started volunteering at a skilled nursing home, I observed a set of new teenaged volunteers who came to help with a craft at the monthly meeting of the Red Hat Society. I heard several of the volunteers speak slowly and loudly, using a sing-song voice. In response, I saw many of the residents roll their eyes.

Unfortunately, I had flashbacks to when I also first started as a volunteer. I altered my speech inappropriately as well, hoping to be supportive but coming off as patronizing instead.

I have since learned to identify the features of elderspeak. More importantly, I’ve learned to change my attitude. At its core, elderspeak communicates a condescending attitude. And from that attitude the person’s language might demonstrate the following features of elderspeak: Speaking slowly Speaking loudly Using a sing-song voice Inflecting statements to sound like a question Using the pronouns “we,” “us,” and “our” in place of “you.”: “How are we doing today?” Using pet names such as “sweetheart,” “dearie,” or “honey” Shortening sentences Simplifying syntax (sentence structure) Simplifying vocabulary Repeating statements or questions Answering questions for the older adult: “You would like your lunch now, wouldn’t you?” In other ways talking for the older adult: “You are having a good time on the patio today, I see. And you have your pink sweater on, which you love. Right?” Asking people questions that assume role loss, idleness and powerlessness such as “Who did you used to be?” “What did you...

Just tried the 7 course tasting venue at the Library and here is my review. 1- the room was freezing as it's connected to where the exterior doors open frequently so I was physically uncomfortable during the meal to the point where I had to put on my winter coat. There is a fireplace in the middle of the room so if you have an opportunity and it's winter, request a table directly by the fire to warm up. 2- as stated elsewhere in the reviews, this is an extremely casual dining in a three star hotel, so no need to dress up and don't expect any kind of nice dining atmosphere. 3- the food was good for the most part but to me, none of it was great. My recommendation is that if there is something in particular on the menu that you really like, it's worthwhile coming. So for me, I wasn't having turkey for Christmas so this was a perfect opportunity to get a good turkey and ham dinner. And I have to say, that was the best plate of the 7 courses. 4- I was worried about the service because my experience is that when the service has already been paid for, it can be really good in a fine dining restaurant, but sometimes it can be really horrible. The servers were nice and when they were out for the specific courses, their service was fine, but between courses, it was virtually impossible to get any service, I had to wait and wait and wait and wave my hands in the air so obviously that it was another patron that pointed it out to the server- that I had been trying to get service for a long time. This happened 3 times including one time that I kept saying -excuse me, excuse me- and another patron had to point out again that I wanted service. This must impact the restaurant because in places like this, you would normally want people buying more alcohol. etc., although that's not what I wanted, you would think they would be more attentive to attract more sales. 5- Out of the seven courses, I thought that the shrimp cocktail and the turkey and ham plate were the best. The salad was supposed to have goat cheese, but it appeared to be missing from the plate. This was one of the times I was asking for a server as I thought my cheese was missing from the plate. But she explained that it was basically just a few specs of goat cheese grated on the salad. The tortiere was OK, but I really wanted some ketchup to go with it and I couldn't get service so it ate very dry. The soup course was rather bland, and the dessert wasn't good at all as the Gingerbread cake was hard like dry toast, so not really palatable in my opinion. So overall, I would say it is worth coming to try one time, but it's not something I would do regularly and I definitely wouldn't chance it if the food on the menu wasn't a...

Although I enjoyed the outing and my company, this meal was unfortunately a disappointing one in my opinion. The meal started with " cheese puffs" which were anything but puffy, and were cold and soggy... this set the tone for the entire meal. The second course was the potato leak soup which came out with a smell that reminded me of a nursing home... by this point I'm feeling like I'm at a canteen rather then what i thought would be a fine dinning experience. The third course was a salad lyonnaise topped with a COLD runny poached egg which was weird for me... Runny eggs should be warm and overall was boring. Next we had scallops which were cooked nicely and the sauce was tasty but they were not as described, they were poached and lacking any "golden gratin crust" as listed in the menu. They were adorable in there miniature size i will say however. Then we had what I can only assume was a pallet cleanser which was suppose to be a lemon and thyme SORBET... it was crushed ice with lemon and way too much thyme ... it was funny to see everyone's struggling faces with this one. Now that we had nice cleansed palates, we were greated with a plate that looked like your finest can of dog food poured over lumpy potatoes and a fancy chunk of under cooked carrot on the side that attempted to resuscitate this dying dish.. The taste was incredibly bland once again and lacked even the most basic of seasoning like salt and pepper. Oh how I desperately wanted some salt and pepper! Lastly we had dessert, and I thought surely this would be a treat . Expecting a delicious WARM apple dessert with ice cream, i thought they can't screw that up! Well unfortunately that was also a lunch bag let down. The apple although pretty, was a wet, soggy, cold swirling of apple slivers, with a cold caramel sauce and a melon baller sized scoop of ice cream on the side. I truly was in shock at the quality of the food, the temperature, and the overall feel which was like being at a canteen with the goal of just being fed... nothing special. I love the idea of this place and with better ambiance, decore, timing and some flavorful food, it would be amazing. Perhaps this was just a bad week and I hope that is the case. Unfortunately, I left feeling FILLED with regret and a sore butt from sitting on a firm chair for 3 hours.

Update I reached out via email and received a response which was well received. They were polite and appreciative and offered a full refund with the opportunity to come experience it again. They acknowledge that improvements need to be made and that changes will be implemented. The response meant a lot from me as initially I received no response and my post was deleted. I firmly beleive in...