Smitty's Family Restaurant - Port Alberni — Restaurant in Port Alberni

The wait staff were pleasant and kind….but the first thing you notice when you walk in this place is the intense odour of urine. It’s like a very strong scent of uric acid and ammonia that comes from one source and one source alone, the evacuations of a human bladder. Just absolutely revolting. Maybe a bunch of drunken patrons had peed on the seats over the years and they just refused to properly clean or replace soiled seats. Who knows. I can say that when I used the restroom (which was in a state of utter disrepair and grotesque putrefaction) it was a pleasant respite from the horrid bouquet in the main dining room. The lemony scent of expelled bowels was the highlight of the experience for my nose, besides the moment I walked out into the fresh air afterwards. The food is very lazily made and corners are cut in such an obvious manner that it could only be due to apathy. Frozen veggies, really? Really? You can get the dishwasher to prep veggies in the morning. It’s not that big a deal. But again, I say, the wait staff was very kind...

I'm not sure how a server can confuse herself on a drink order such as 3 glasses of water, and one cup of coffee. The three who wanted water had to hold our arms up like children. The coffee was horrible, and was served in a cup that nobody realized was caked in chunks of crud inside. The silverware also, needed a rewash(if they even wash dishes?!). One of our party waited for his food while the rest of us were served. He could see his order, getting cold, on the landing. We were seated right by the doors to the kitchen(his meal was complimentary AFTER he entered the kitchen threshold to ask kitchen staff if someone was going to bring it to our table) These are only some of the issues that caught my attention at this 'restaurant'. I wasn't the only one at our table that had complaints either. I had avoided this restaurant for years because of similar issues, and on a whim thought "it can't be as bad as I remember?!"

Yes. Yes it can.

0/5 - will...

I came in today with a group of five. We were seated, got our drinks and menus immediately only to sit around waiting for almost an hour without a single person coming back to take our order. The restaurant was dead, there was no reason for all 3 of the waitresses to remain huddled in the back for the entirety of our stay. It was bad to the point our group decided to walk out. Not to mention the waitresses standing in the back were laughing at us when I was trying to get the bill for our drinks. They have some serious staff problems that need to be addressed. Clearly these girls are either being paid too little or too much. I’ve also been here once before and the breakfast food was terrible. Easy to say Smittys did not make a redemption. Genuinely the worst experiences...