Gambrinus Las Palmas — Restaurant in Las Palmas de Gran Canaria

So, honey, let me spill the tea on this so-called Canarian culinary haven. As someone with a taste for the fabulous and a palate that's seen more Canarian delights than you can shake a feather boa at, I waltzed into this joint with hopes as high as my stilettos.

Now, let me throw some well-deserved shade and spill the deets on the highlights. The sausage, the bread, and that aioli – darling, they were the only redeeming factors in this tragic play. Kudos for managing to get those right, but beyond that, it was like a culinary drag show gone wrong.

Picture this: the food, attempting to be the star of the show, ended up being the understudy in a Shakespearean tragedy. Each bite felt like a dramatic monologue of disappointment, sweetie. Canarian cuisine deserves a standing ovation, not the sad performance I witnessed.

And the service, darling, was a disaster. I expected Broadway-level charisma, but all I got was an off-Broadway flop. It's like they mistook my table for the rehearsal space – zero stars for that lackluster performance.

Now, let's talk coin, baby! The prices, oh, they skyrocketed faster than my fabulous high notes. I'd need a sugar daddy to afford a second visit. For that kinda money, I expect fireworks, not a culinary letdown.

And don't even get me started on the smoking ban. I couldn't light up after the meal – it's like they wanted to suffocate my fabulousness. Where's the freedom to sparkle and shine, darling?

The menu, oh honey, it was like trying to decipher hieroglyphics. A confusing mess that left me more puzzled than a drag queen in a library. Canarian cuisine should be celebrated, not hidden behind a menu that's as clear as mud.

In conclusion, my sweet darlings, this place was a tragic misstep in the world of Canarian dining. Sausage and bread were the only divas on this stage; the rest of the cast needs a serious makeover. Save your coin, find a joint that knows how to serve Canarian realness without the...

Waiter trying to humiliate us. Disrespectful, childish service. We booked via phone from Scotland a couple of weeks before arriving, so we would be sure to have somewhere to eat lunch on Christmas Day. No problem booking - very pleasant woman booked us in.

But when we arrived to eat, things were not so agreeable. The waiter we had seemed to think he was being clever by trying to confuse me. I speak Spanish.

I have a degree in Spanish and I lived here for a year. So I understand what's going on, although I speak with an accent. The waiter seemed to not realise this. We ordered 2 glasses of cava. Simple enough. He asked whether we wanted rosado - rosé. OK, sounds good. He brought the cava. It was ordinary, white cava. When he brought the food, morcilla and tortilla, he said "sopa y turrón" (soup and nougat). Oddly, even though I had ordered everything in Spanish, he seemed to think I wouldn't understand him when he spoke in Spanish!

I asked whether a salad contained fish. He assured me it didn't. When he brought ir, it had lumps of tuna in it. I challenged him, and he said "I thought you meant anchovies". Pescado means fish. Any fish. He then offered to take it away and pick out the tuna. Not replace with a fresh salad - just pick out the fish.

I didn't let on to my wife what he was doing, because she was enjoying her meal, but it was disrespectful and childish.

Clearly, this waiter, and perhaps other waiters at that restaurant, thinks he is superior to all his customers who are not Spanish.

The food, except the morcilla, was pleasant, as was the ambience. So it should be, for the inflated prices. Avoid - go somewhere else where they appreciate...

So, I checked out Gambrinus with my fair share of Canarian cuisine know-how. Gotta say, I'm no stranger to this.

Let's kick off with the good stuff – their sausage is a definite win. Delicious, hitting all the right notes, and a true Canarian delight.

But, here's the scoop on the not-so-great-all parts. The food was a bit all over the place, totally missing that Canarian magic. The service? Well..

The menu at Gambrinus? Confusing. Like, really. And the prices? They were reaching for the stars, but delivering… i don’t really know if you can call it food? felt like daylight robbery. I mean, I came for a meal, not a bank heist?

Also, no smoking allowed, wtaf?? It's Las Palmas? That was the final straw 😢

In a nutshell, Gambrinus nails the sausage game, but the rest needs some heavy fine-tuning. Hope they take this as friendly advice to amp up the Canarian vibe and smooth...