Brunch — Restaurant in Conshohocken

UPDATE: I'm sad to say that I must change my review. Conshohocken Cafe is no more, replaced with "Brunch Everyday", and I can no longer recommend it. This isn't a case of "my favorite eatery changed management and I'm mad," this is a case of "my favorite eatery changed management and oh my dear and fluffy lord, WHAT HAPPENED?"

They clearly redecorated, and have some of the same wait staff, but the management and the chefs are all different. They used to get a high-quality coffee for their house blend, but now it just tastes like bog-standard ARA restaurant coffee, vaguely acid and not tasting much like anything else. It's awful. Maybe their "cold-brewed" coffee is better, but if they're using the same grounds, I doubt it extremely. I'll overlook a lot of ills if the coffee is good, and this ISN'T anymore. The orange juice is the same, so there's THAT...and it's the only plus I can give.

The food oscillates between boringly average and awful. I ordered an omelette. First warning sign: They do not have ham on the menu for omelettes. Say what? The second most popular omelette filling besides cheese, and you don't HAVE it? Sure enough, it wasn't on the menu. So since I was paying for 3 items in my omelette, I ordered bacon, cheddar, and pork roll. That sort of approximates ham, in a spammish sort of way. I wasn't raised on it, so it's not my favorite. It came with roasted potatoes. I had to ask for an English muffin on the side.

The omelette I was brought (they clearly had to struggle to get it right, as I watched them arguing and going back and forth over the ticket) was one of the worst egg dishes I've ever eaten in my life. I had two bites, and had to stop. The fillings were...okay...not exciting, not really very tasty, but adequate. The eggs, however, tasted dreadful. I have no idea what they did to them, but they tasted as if the chef sprayed the pan with Pam or something, then didn't let the propellent evaporate before putting in the eggs. They seem to cook them in a small saute pan under the salamander. They get nicely puffy, but the taste was revolting. The potatoes were hot. That's all I can say for them. I've had bad truck stop hash browns that were better. So I sent it back.

I got a breakfast sandwich -- shell eggs, pork roll, and cheese on brioche. It was barely edible. First off, don't put over-easy eggs in a SANDWICH. Over-medium is barely acceptable for food you expect people to hold in their hands to eat. These eggs were so drippy the yolks promptly dripped out of the sandwich entirely and onto the plate. It didn't taste as bad as the omelette...mostly because it didn't taste at all. It was bland, unseasoned, slimy because of the undercooked fried egg, and the pork roll was lukewarm and limp. I prefer it to at least have a little crust on it from the griddle, and this seemed barely warmed-over. I ate my English muffin, some of the potatoes, and left the bulk of the sandwich. I would have had to be lots hungrier to eat that, and I'd just had a fasting lab at the doctor's office across the street.

They got rid of the in-house free wifi, and all of the nicer items on the menu were gone. No more crabcakes with spicy aioli, no more Super Bowl breakfast bowl, and not only did they not have the home-cured country-style ham I sampled last time I was there, they didn't have ham AT ALL. I've seen restaurants take pork products off the menu, usually because the owners were Muslim, but they at least tried, with turkey ham or something! They still had bacon and pork roll, so it couldn't be THAT. Heck, they even have SCRAPPLE! So it can't be about the "healthy" thing.

The menu was abbreviated to the vanishing point. They got rid of anything interesting or worth the high price. They kept the millennial avocado toast. The rest of the menu is so insipid I'd rather drive 20 minutes and go to a diner closer to home after my doctor's appointments. I've had WaWa "sizzli" sandwiches that I enjoyed more.

Avoid as if Ol' Scratch was standing behind the counter. Not good eats....

I can't tell if the reviews are done by staff or people, but this is not a 4.5+ star place. It's your standard conshy place which is paying a few extra bucks for the standard food because you're in conshy and the menu is full of fancy creations to cover up the average food and preparation. We ordered, the best thing on the menu and were completely underwhelmed. The crowd that we saw seemed to be a year or too out of college, so it would make sense that this place being better than college cafe food would drive up the google rating. I would rather drive 3 miles up the road and pay half price for better quality food albeit simple standard breakfast and not fancy creations.

In terms of service, I'm confused. It was average service, not bad nor amazing. I actually received a cold plate of food, discussed sending it back with my table, but decided to eat it and just move on and not come back. At the end of the meal the manager cleared our plates and asked how the meal was and saw the disappointment in my face. He continued to ask, so I told him it was cold and didn't feel like it was my responsibility to tell the restaurant to serve hot food and was planning on just eating it and leaving. The good was they comped us my meal which wasn't my intention. The bad was we got lectured about how we were supposed to flag someone down to tell them they served us cold food. Like I said, confused more than happy or upset about the...

Yesterday morning I had what left me with an undesirable impression after picking up my order and then eating the meal.

First and foremost, when paying for the order, the application on the iPad did not allow the transaction to complete or not clearly marked to do without leaving a tip (pickup order). In addition, there were seemingly only three options avaiable: 18, 20, & 25%. This I found to be very presumptuous. Yes, there was an option to manually enter the amount (not clearly obvious). My point being that it is we, the customer that makes the decision and to try and force/limit such a choice, is poor business choice. Tipping is optional and based on quality of service...

That, and my order of French Toasts was nothing as advertised or that I'd witnessed when I've dined in the location, previously (formerly known as Conshohocken Cafe). While eating, I found a used staple (yes, used metal staple) in one bite... so yeah, I will take my business elsewhere.

My response to business reply:

There was no 'may have been', I bit into a bent staple that had been used at some point as clearly marked by the bends from a stapler and should not have been in my food. I opened the container, moved the contents to a plate with a serving spoon and went to sit down and eat...

I do not own a stapler...

I have no reason to make something...