Transcendent. Life-Altering. Possibly Illegal in Some Countries.
There are bartenders, and then there is Rachel—the sovereign queen of spirits, the alchemist of intoxication, the unchallenged empress of the sticky, dimly lit mahogany frontier. If Hemingway, Hunter S. Thompson, and Dionysus walked into a bar and Rachel was behind it, they'd sit down, shut up, and start taking notes.
My journey began on a Thursday—a cursed Thursday, no less. My soul was cracked like a poorly fired ceramic mug from a gas station in rural New Jersey. The sky wept. My Uber driver smelled like regret and microwaved shrimp. And yet... fate brought me to this humble establishment. I entered as a broken man, but little did I know that Rachel was on shift.
The moment she turned around, it was as if the air changed. Glasses clinked in harmony. The ice machine fell silent in reverence. A jukebox that had been dead since 2017 whispered out a single note of Earth, Wind & Fire before bursting into flames.
She asked, “What are you having?” And I said, “Something to make me forget the last three years.” Without blinking, she crafted a drink so complex, so emotionally nuanced, I briefly saw my childhood dog wink at me from the foam. I sipped it. Reality folded in on itself like a Dali painting being sucked into a vacuum. I had a vision of my ancestors, all of them nodding solemnly, whispering, "She gets it."
Over the course of the evening, Rachel performed no fewer than six minor miracles, including but not limited to:
Reuniting a divorced couple.
Teaching a raccoon (that wandered in somehow) how to tip.
Diagnosing a man’s gluten allergy.
Winning a sudden-death arm-wrestling match against a touring Canadian lumberjack team using only her pinky finger.
Performing a beer-pouring technique so graceful it made a nearby ballet dancer cry and quit forever.
And somehow, somehow, calming down a man in a fedora who was about to start a podcast in public.
Every draft was a novella. Every garnish a thesis. She didn't just pour beers—she summoned them, like she had brokered a deal with the gods. I saw her whisper to a bottle. I don't know what she said. The bottle wept. So did I.
The only downside to this experience is that no other bartender will ever live up to her. I now walk through life a haunted man, chasing that perfect balance of bitters and bliss. I've started writing poetry. My landlord is concerned.
If Rachel is bartending when you walk in, cancel your plans. Call your mother. Pet a stray cat. You are about to witness greatness, and it will unmake and remake you in her image.
TL;DR: Rachel is not a bartender. She is a cosmic event in a human vessel. Tip well, or be...
Read moreLet me start by saying that I am more than disappointed that my first review for this establishment is less than completely positive.
To be clear I have been to this place many times, and have always been a paying and tipping customer.
Most times it has been very enjoyable .. they have a wide selection of pinball machines and various other arcade games as well as a great selection of drinks and the atmosphere is generally welcoming. However, tonight it was a little bit different.
I came in with a group of several people hours before this specific employee approached us... so we were very clearly paying customers had been there for a bit. Relaxing, chatting, gaming after a long week.
I asked the bartender (shoutout Keegan, you rock) to recommend a specific beer to me out of my comfort zone-I kind of gave some descriptions of what I liked and he gave me a canned beer because it wasn't on tap. It was sealed, so I paid for said canned beer with my tab, and that was that. Or I thought.
This other employee (NOT the bartender Keegan- I want to be crystal clear, he is wonderful every time I have visited) decided to approach the people that I was with, and asked if the canned beer was purchased and by whom. They told her it was indeed purchased- it was for me to take home later. I already signed the tab.
Then she proceeded to approach me while I was sitting at the bar with a draft beer literally in my hand, and an open tab running- probably forty dollars or more for the group at this point.
THEN this person decided to ask me if I had paid for it-and not in particularly nice way.
It seemed accusatory.
She seemed to not believe them, and confronted me after asking who bought it? Oof.
I felt deeply uncomfortable and so did the people that I was with.. like I said at the very beginning, I have been here many times before and I'm disappointed my first review on this arcade is this sad but to be honest... why is somebody going to steal a beer ONE beer out of your fridge that probably cost you less than 4$ a can in bulk.....? There were some hoops jumped through mentally to come to such a strange, pessimistic charge. One of the strangest experiences I've had in a place like this.
As someone who's worked service industry management for many years... I'm honestly sort of shocked. Anywho, every single other employee has been wonderful, this was a one time situation.
Good luck and have fun!
(And don't be accused of theft as a...
Read moreAmazing and fun bar/arcade right in the heart of my favorite place to hang out in the city near Five Points. Fantastically put together with a great assortment of games, pinball and local beers. With The Keg attracting one of the most welcoming and cheerful crowds here in Jacksonville, you can always expect to be greeted with open arms upon entering into a clattering of button mashing, laughter and sound effects galore.
And if you're ever looking for more outreach to the community, the Keg has a creative rotation of various themed events centered around music, arts and games cycling throughout the week. Also be sure to keep a lookout for the various pop-ups, as well as food trucks for some of the best street food in Jacksonville.
Wonderfully ran by the service/staff, they're always looking to do what they can to help and chat with everyone as they come in with friends or family. Rest assured, there is no lack of presence from the ownership here. Callie in particular cannot be credited enough for her ability to tend to every need as it arises from serving drinks to attending customers with a pleasant conversation. You can really tell she cares about each and every one of her regulars with a great depth and familiarity you can only find among oh so many places. And I promise if you go to the Keg, you're going to see that same exact energy reflected across everyone there.
An absolute must and Jacksonville staple. Check out...
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