La Patrona — Restaurant in New Orleans

The guac was WET--freshly made with very unripe avocados. Only seasoning or spice was salt. This was the first, and a literal offense. Then came the "white cheese dip" ("queso" as the gringos call it). It was WET—runnier than cheese soup. No, literally. And I don't mean the Millennial definition of "literally," (def: figuratively), I mean "literally," literally. Then came the very mediocre entrees. I had 2 enchiladas of different kinds--both were meh. The beans that came with it were also WET. The bowl they were in was clearly necessary, as they were literally DROWNING in their own liquid (the thin, clear kind). The beans in fact sat below the WATER line. You can call these Katrina beans. At the end of the meal, I commented on the queso-soaked-then-microwaved rice that came standard with the entrees, and my mother gave me a look and said "that was my favorite part." I said "Me, too..." and after an awkward pause, I verbalized her thoughts. "And that unfortunately says something about the rest of it." We all cracked up.

Then there was the server. Pretty certain he's the owner, which makes all of this worse. We were his one and only customer and he was rude... Then he served us that trash quac like we wouldn't notice, and the rest is history. Hell no dude. Never again.

Overall the flavors were not horrendous, but they were the epitome of basic. (But still, that WETness tho... See a theme?)

WHY DID I PAY FOR THIS? SHOW ME SOMETHING SPECIAL (or at least decent)! People don't want to pay their hard earned money for basic. WE WANT SOMETHING WE CANNOT DO BETTER OURSELVES!

No clue how this place has an avg 4+...

Horchata here is bomb af. The tacos were admittedly pretty mid, the but enchiladas and rice they have are super good. Salsa that they serve with chips tastes like a roasted salsa molcajeteada, not spicy, super garlicky and super flavorful. Honestly impressive but I would have preferred it spicer.

Their mexican rice reads more like the type of rice made for red beans and rice with cumin and consomé which surprisingly works. It's textured firm like an Indian basmati but fully cooked and flavored perfectly. Surprisingly good even if it didn't seem fried and then cooked in tomato sauce with broth like a traditional Mexican rice.

I would highly recommend getting enchiladas suizas and horchata if you want a good authentic Mexican meal. The beans that it came with just needed a little salt but apart from that they were inoffensive.

Oh also this place is not expensive at all. Way better than what you can find for 1.5x the price in other parts of the city.

Tortillas seem handmade and were good quality, but the pastor as a meat option was meh which is usually my go to.

Nothing here tasted spicy, like at all. Im sure that caters to some people, but for how good the things I said I liked are, you honestly...

I equate this place to going to my Mexican friend’s house and their mom cooks me tacos. That’s pretty much what it was for me, the father took my order, the mother cooked, the daughter got me water, while a Mexican tv channel was running. More cozy than the other nearby Mexican places, feels like you’re at a family’s house.

Very standard Mexican street tacos served. These are the only traditional street-style tacos on Carrollton Avenue. One small corn tortilla, meat, cilantro and white onions. The other places double up on tortillas or fill tacos to the brim + add extras.

The meat did seem to lack a bit of flavor, and the texture wasn’t perfect. Also, the taco tortillas are not cooked crispy, just heated. I prefer them cooked in butter, but who’s to say without butter is traditional.

Holy cow the green sauce and the Valentina hot sauce are friggin hot. I shed tears as my mouth turned into a volcano. I think the asada steak has some hot spices too. Fair warning.

Least expensive tacos in Carrollton, especially on taco Tuesday. For the price, can’t beat it. Though, takes more tacos to fill up here than the...