GABI IS MY LORD AND SAVIOR (and probably Canada’s national treasure)
I walked into Jack Astor’s to grab a bite. I left questioning the very fabric of reality because I had just experienced something so otherworldly, so divinely delicious, so GABI-FIED, that I may never be the same.
First off—Gabi doesn’t just work at Jack Astor’s. Jack Astor’s works for HER. She doesn’t carry a tray; she carries the weight of the entire restaurant industry on her back—and does it in style.
When Gabi showed up at our table, time STOPPED. Birds outside stopped chirping. A baby at the next table said its first words: “That’s Gabi.” My friend cried into their spinach dip and whispered, “I feel safe here.”
She looked us dead in the eyes and asked, “How we doin’ tonight?” And I don’t know what was in her voice—pixie dust? healing crystals? Timbit magic??—but suddenly my student debt didn’t matter anymore. My ex texted me an apology. My posture improved.
She brought out the food so fast I’m convinced she either has superpowers or a wormhole in the kitchen. My burger? Juicier than the latest season of Love Island. My drink? So cold and refreshing it probably made Elsa shiver. Gabi knew I wanted extra ranch before I did. She is clairvoyant. A psychic in sneakers.
But wait—she didn’t just serve food. SHE SERVED PRESENCE. Her vibe? Immaculate. Her energy? Like a triple-shot espresso wrapped in a warm hug. Her jokes? Funnier than most stand-up comedians. She’s the human version of when your favorite song comes on at the perfect moment.
At one point I asked for ketchup, and Gabi sprinted like she was competing in the Olympic condiment relay. I tried to thank her, but all that came out was a single tear and a quiet “I love you.”
Long story short: If Gabi ran the country, there would be free garlic bread for everyone, no taxes, and world peace by Thursday.
Thank you, Gabi. I don’t know what’s in the water you’re drinking, but bottle it and sell it immediately. I would chug it. Then tip you $1,000.
I want to marry her and name our kid Jack❤️
I will never go to another restaurant again. Just Jack Astor’s. Just Gabi....
Read moreElegant, devine, succulent, indulgent. These are but a few words to describe Jack Astor's...
By 68bc Julius Caesar had achieved so much at the age of 32, understanding his place in history acknowledging his amazing feats to finally make proud and live up to his hero Alexander the Great. That's how I feel about Astor's, and it's servers...being up there as one of the greatest restaurants in history; and to speak of servers, my dear Abi. Her chivalry was off the charts, her uniform, properly pressed and ironed, her shoes, cleaner then the marble of Leonardo's David, her hair, perfectly fixed to a proper and courtly manor she was unbelievably polite, carefully placing our meals down in a gallant manor, coming by our table to make sure our meal was up to standard, asking questions to hopefully improve and grow not just as a server...but as a human being.
Atmosphere, texture, culture, ambiance; all top notch, a building of devine presence beating all the competition under our stratosphere and with no remorse whatsoever. To hell with the British I say TO HELL WITH THEM! But I digress...
I ordered the Mushroom Truffle Cheeseburger w/ bacon and MUST I SAY! I have never had the ability NAE...the privilege, to allow all 10,000 of my taste buds to accumulate the taste of such devine heaven before. Like drinking from a golden chalice I feel as if I have embraced a new identity and took on a new position as one of God's disciples. But alas, I can not continue to put my gracious feelings onto this review, as I will be here till the end of the eden, so I will continue to buy from this place of great devine and I don't care if it's the golden apple, for I must be Eve because although my bank continues to tell me I shant spend another dollar on this establishment as I have taken out 2 mortgages and much of my savings from my children's college fund...I will be there the next morning at PRECISELY 11:45am when they open the next of mornings... because like Julius Caesar, I am just living up to the support of my heros...
𝓙𝓪𝓶𝓮𝓼 𝓟....
Read moreWith a warm and welcoming environment, this Jack Astor's branch certainly does not disappoint. A review of 4.5 stars would be most accurate but due to the limits I unfortunately have to round down.
Me and a couple of friends had a wonderful dining experience here just a while ago. We were greeted very warmly, by I assume a manager, and after walking through the restaurant, we were lead to the patio. Menu options were plenty and I loved the variety of food and drinks. As you can see in the pictures, the variety is clearly visible.
The waiter taking our orders was the kindest soul. She constantly checked on our table to make sure everything was up to standard or if we needed anything. A detail I wanted to mention was the "last call" they had. Our group went there a bit late so while ordering, our waiter informed us about the restaurant's "last call" and what time it'd be. After, towards the end of our meal, the waiter came to us asking "would you like anything before last call?". This act clearly showcased their care and attention to the customers which I truly appreciate,
Similiar to the top notch service, food quality was nothing short of amazing. The attention and time put into the food was visible from the well done presentation and delicious taste. Portions were adequate and prices were acceptable compared to quality.
Only reason I deducted a 0.5 (had to round to a 1 star deduction unfortunately) is that the wait time to be seated was disappointing compared to expectations. We were waiting at the front door for around 10 minutes because there was no one...
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