Le Caméo — Restaurant in Grasse

If you are reading this, I pray that you haven’t yet decided to eat at this restaurant.

If you’re already sitting down, order onion rings, put your phone down, and don’t read any further. Unless you haven’t ordered yet, then get out.

In my twenty-something years on this Earth, this is, without question, the most lamentable dining experience I have had the distinct displeasure of having. I downloaded a new iPhone app and installed a new digital keyboard on my phone to leave this, the first (and probably only) restaurant review of my entire life.

Let’s talk food, if I can call it that. Veggie pasta. If by “veggie”, you mean freezer-burned and microwaved green beans sloshing in a stew of half-rotten julienned eggplant, it’s right on the money. If by “pasta”, you mean industrialized, overcooked, underloved je-ne-sais-quoi, sign me up. If this utterly understated—and truly, quite generous— review sounds like a great way to toss € 40 to the wind, they most certainly have plenty of tables to spare.

Let’s talk service. In all fairness, lots of tables, lots of orders, lots going on. The service was certainly not memorable, but it was nothing too utterly terrible. Except for our specific server, whose behavior was unabashedly shameless and utterly shameful.

Next to our table sat a pair of visitors to Antibes, whose French was not proficient, but they tried. This poor, unknowing couple was strong-armed by their server when it came time to pay the bill into leaving a tip. She seemed to try to confuse them by switching into her native Italian until they wearily agreed to leave €4 for her. She did the same for us, but my boyfriend and I wanted so badly to leave that we simply agreed to tip her and leave as soon as possible to avoid the same kind of aggressive confrontation. Alas, when she pressed us, we quickly agreed to leave a tip.

The food was horrible, sure, but I’ve eaten bad food in all sorts of places. The food in conjunction with the nightmarish service is something I sincerely hope to never experience ever again.

Thankfully, we made reservations for tomorrow night at the restaurant just next door. This is not a mistake I will ever make, ever again. Please learn...

A symphony of disappointment orchestrated by an ensemble of ineptitude and mediocrity.

Ladies and gentlemen, let us discuss the matter at hand—the service. A ballet of rudeness performed with the grace of a bull in a china shop. The snail-paced procession of waitstaff could've been mistaken for a parade in reverse. One might muse that they were practicing the art of time dilation, making each second stretch into an eternity.

And now, let us delve into the pièce de résistance—the culinary creations that graced the palate with their inglorious presence. A burger, oh what a majestic creation it was, with a taste that transported the senses to a realm of perplexity. A veritable lesson in the delicate balance between despair and displeasure. And the tartare, dear reader, can only be described as a gastronomical rollercoaster, designed to test the limits of human fortitude.

In the annals of culinary history, our dear reviewer finds themselves in the illustrious position of having partaken in the worst iterations of burger and tartare known to humankind. A badge of honor, perhaps, for enduring such feats of gustatory punishment.

My esteemed audience, if the prospect of transforming a perfectly fine day into an experiment in torment appeals to you, by all means, pay this establishment a visit. However, if the preservation of your culinary sensibilities and overall well-being holds any value, consider seeking refuge elsewhere—somewhere that promises a semblance of enjoyment, rather than a descent into culinary abyss.

Bon appétit, should you choose to venture forth into this harrowing...

I am so shocked to see the low reviews for this place. We were welcomed in by a waiter who I would say is a PERFECT host, young short lad with a peeky blinders haircut. A cheeky chappie who was really owning the floor and making everyone feel like a welcome friend. I'm not sure if he is part of the family business but if not he was an awesome employee and had the best waiting skills I have seen in a long time. I had mussels, my friend had pizza, both were delicious and delivered piping hot to the table within about 15 mins of ordering. We ate in the beautiful picturesque Square under large umbrella's to shade us from the sun. I normally stay away from places bang in the tourist area's, often you find less quality and high prices. This place has changed my mind, I frequently check reviews before going to eat but didn't on this occasion, I'm SO glad I didn't because if I had seen the low score I would have avoided it. In a heartbeat I would visit there again and would recommend you aren't swayed and go and enjoy it. I'm not dismissive of other people's bad experiences but most will only review if it's bad, we saw a whole restaurant full of people really enjoying their meals. We left a tip, happily and without being...