Villaggio Porto - Restaurante Pizzaria — Restaurant in Porto

The glowing reviews here must be part of some kind of scam or weird social science experiment or conceptual art project. This was quite possibly one of the worst sit-down restaurant experiences I’ve ever had in 37 years on God’s Green Earth.

We were ambushed with cheap and stale plastic-wrapped crostini and olives which once opened were included on the bill for several euros. These tasted like expired airplane or prepackaged vending machine food. The house white wine was from a box and rancid, the large caprese and pepperoni pizzas were so awful my friend and I had to stop eating, pay and leave immediately to get alternative wine and pizza at another restaurant nearby we’d been to before which we knew was good. The arugula and tomatoes on my pizza were stale and tasteless and terrible in quality, the tomatoes were sliced leaving the inedible top parts of the tomato on more than one portion. Each piece of tomato was cut in a different haphazard way as if by a drunk frat boy with no culinary experience anxious to get whatever ingredients he could onto the dough as quickly as possible. Every part of the pizza felt cheap and hastily, inexpertly executed - nothing was fresh or Italian or had any flavour. Just staggeringly bad. It was food that tasted like it was made by people who didn’t know how to cook or who were going out of their way to prank customers. The location and interior and high reviews are deceptive. I can’t work it out but something is not right here. This is the first Google restaurant review I’ve ever written but I feel compelled. Don’t go here. We paid 40 for psychedelically awful food....

Awful experience, since the bad welcoming of the person behind the counter, to the food itself. If I could give 0 stars, I would. After leaving my things in the places we reserved, I kindly asked for the way to the bathroom, which I had no response to in words but simply a gesture to keep going front, and no, the person speaks perfectly and understood my question. After I ordered a steak with the nice waitress, we received a moldy cheese as entry, which the waitress changed after I pointed it out and apologized for. The steak then arrived and it was uncooked from the inside, the texture was like a chewing gum, full of nerves, really bad quality and very salty. The French fries served were mostly burned small bits of potatoes. The rice was dry. And the so called tiramissu was almost just mascarpone with only one small biscuit. So after loosing my appetite to all this, I asked for a doggy bag to avoid waste and so I could bring the meat to street animals. To my surprise, they charged me for it, even though they could have given it away as a courtesy. I expressed my discontent about the food and the bad experience to the cashier, well, he simply didn’t care. Oh and the small thin 3-4 bread sticks you find at the table, well, don’t get fooled, you pay for them in the end. Anyway, a total disaster, and the meal was not cheap at all. I could have eating far better for less than half the price payed. I won’t ever return, that I...

Scam is the perfect word to describe this godforsaken restaurant. I knew I was in for a treat the moment I planted myself on their chairs.

To kick off this abysmal experience, they ambush you with unsolicited, overpriced starters (7 euros total) the second you sit down. No mention of them not being complimentary – but we caught on to their little scheme.

Then I order a glass of Ruby Porto wine (4.5 euros), and they have the audacity to serve me a pathetic 10 ml splash. Shocked, I questioned the waiter – other glasses were filled to the brim! He had the nerve to claim it's normal because it's "expensive" wine. Newsflash: a bottle costs a measly 7-8 euros.

I explicitly asked for tap water twice, and the clueless waiter still brought a (paid) water bottle. I swallowed my anger and hoped the food would redeem them. Spoiler alert: it didn't.

Their so-called Italian food is a disgrace. The Pasta Arrabbiata was nothing more than store-bought pasta slathered in tomato paste.

Do yourself a favor and steer clear of this disaster. The stars on this restaurant are either fake, or the place has gone to hell in a handbasket, because there's nothing Italian about the...