Tsuki - Asian food & Sushi & Poke & Cafe Viet Nam — Restaurant in Bratislava

There is a moment of cognitive dissonance that strikes when you walk into a Cafe that purports to serve sushi, Vietnamese cuisine, and poke bowls on the exterior facade. It’s a tell, a subtle warning that a kitchen might be a jack-of-all-trades and master of none. But the promise of a hearty bowl of pho from a place with strong online reviews and a Vietnamese owner is a siren song difficult to resist. The reality, however, begins not in the kitchen, but at the front door. We were immediately presented with a job—the retrieval of our own menus, grimy with the history of countless hands, from a pile and to take them to a table of our choosing. Sure, happy to do that for you.

The table, once chosen, came with its own ecosystem: a cloud of fruit flies that had laid claim to the window, a silent testament to a lack of sanitation. We began to dispatch them one by one with our napkins, a small act of violence that left no trace on a window already so layered with grime that it could be considered additive to the geological record. The accoutrements of the table—the lamp, the salt and pepper shakers—were equally neglected, each stained with the ghost of meals past. The surface of our table was slick, not from polish, but from the simple, inadequate wiping of a wet rag.

We came for the food, however, and in the pho and bún bò Huế we found a narrative. After more than 100 bowls of Vietnamese noodle soup around the globe, we have a benchmark, a baseline expectation. This bowl of pho was never going to be the one to rule them all, but it was close to being the bowl at the bottom of the list. The two broths, save for a few stray herbs and a splash of chili oil, were almost identical. The bún bò Huế had a respectable noodle, but the pho noodles were a tragic overcooked mess. The broth, which is the heart and soul of any Vietnamese noodle soup, was both exceedingly salty and bore the flat, chemical finish of MSG and processed bouillon. There was a conspicuous absence of lemongrass, oxtail, or pork knuckles. The bún bò Huế had plenty of pig's blood curd, but this felt less like an intentional ingredient and more like a desperate attempt to add substance. There was no fresh onion or lime, just a slice of lemon that we dared not touch in the case of retribution for our recent massacre.

This is a restaurant with ambition but a fundamental disregard for the basics. The food was hot and filling, and there was an attempt, however flawed. We acknowledge the difficulty of running an authentic Vietnamese restaurant in Bratislava, and the waitress was far more efficient and gracious than the gentleman at the door. But a good meal is not just about the food. It's about the entire experience, from the moment you are greeted to the moment you leave. The bones of a great space are here: a large, industrially chic interior in a prime location. A deep clean, a trimmed-down menu focused on what they can do well, a more thoughtful atmosphere, and a renewed focus on hospitality could elevate this place from a passable cafe to an exceptional restaurant. As it stands, it’s a bowl of soup in a...

Yesterday morning, we were passing through Bratislava and visited your restaurant — there were five of us. The next day, we all developed symptoms of food poisoning. We are currently on the road and feeling very unwell. We kindly ask you to address the quality of your food and sanitary conditions.

We understand your concerns, but we must clarify that after visiting your restaurant, we didn’t eat anywhere else except for McDonald’s, and we are confident that McDonald’s was not the cause. Compared to your restaurant, we trust their food safety standards much more.

The timing and symptoms of our food poisoning clearly point to the meal we had at your place. It’s unfortunate, but we believe it’s important to raise this issue so that it doesn’t happen to other guests...

First of all, the food was good, fresh and tasty. But unfortunately, everything else was just awful. When we entered the restaurant and greeted the staff, we received no response. We sat down, but no one brought us a menu, so I had to get one myself. We waited a long time for someone to take our order, and in the end, I had to go to the front desk to order. The two dishes didn’t arrive together — my girlfriend’s dish came first, and mine followed almost 15 minutes later. Overall, the experience was so disappointing that I absolutely cannot recommend this place. The staff simply didn’t seem to...