Nando's Peterborough — Restaurant in England

I had limited time for a meal with my littlest child whilst my eldest was out with her club. But we thought an hour and a half was sufficient for a cheeky Nandos.

We were seated, but the ordering process was not explained, so we sat for about 10 minutes before realised that we needed to order food ourselves. I got up, ordered and sat back down. My daughter doesn't like fizzy drinks or cordials so I asked if we could replace the cordial with water, the server looked confused and told me that as cordial was part of the children's meal, we had to have it and handed me a glass.. Which I promptly filled with water and left the cordial!!

35 minutes passed and our food still wasn't out and we noticed other diners had received their orders. Another 5 minutes and I asked where our food was, to be told that it would be another 15 minutes! This would have made me late to collect my other daughter so I asked for a refund. The manager didn't even apologise, just went to the till, started tapping, I asked if she needed my card and she handed me the cash for the value of the meals. It seemed I'd annoyed her by explaining that if I'd been told there was such a lengthy wait, I wouldn't have stayed!

This is the second time I've had such an experience, you'd have thought I'd have learned the first time round. Result = not going to...

I feel like I've achieved most of my life goals. I never write them down, even though successful people like pop stars say that's what you should do - but that doesn't seem to have affected me much.

I think, though, that when I am old and decrepit, lying in a hospital bed, staring at the ceiling tiles praying for the sweet, sweet embrace of death, I will wish that I had done enough in my youth to get a Black Card.

If I had a Black Card I wouldn't just eat a chicken butterfly, hot, with piri-piri chips, corn and a refillable drink. Oh no... I would also make other people enjoy the same thing, initially at no cost at all.

I would be like a drug pusher, providing sweet little tidbits of Nando's chicken to vulnerable people, encouraging them to go for more and more until they became addicted, like crazed, wild-eyed beasts shuddering and shaking, waiting for their next hit of salty, fiery-hot pleasure. Some of them might even pick extra hot, so hardcore would their addiction be.

But, alas, I have no Black Card. So I just go here and forlornly stare at the tiny bits of ice in my empty glass, dreaming about what could be as old-age races inexorably towards me like stampede of demented, death-bringing buffalo. I...

I mean...Nando's is Nando's, you always know what to expect. But this particular branch needs some serious renovation. The booth seating is such a state - ripped leather and fabric upholstery, drawings on the walls. Every time we are seated in the booths I have to wipe the seats myself as it's always filthy - greasy stains and food crumbs that will definitely stain your clothing. If the areas visible to customers are presented in such a state, I wonder what's going on in the kitchen...

The toilets are unkept and smelly. There are broken handles, never any toilet paper available - just generally dirty and unpleasant.

Update: visited our local branch recently and was happy to see that they updated the booths - looks so much better. There's soft ice cream on tap - our little one was very happy!

Unfortunately the seats are still greasy and there are crumbs on them. The toilets are still run...