Simply Indian — Restaurant in London

SIMPLY 'GONE MAD' INDIAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Its hard to know where to start in regard to our experience at Simply Indian last night, My friend has dined here and ordered takeaways over the past 11 years with no complaint.... well... until last night. I shall try to condense a very long 40 minutes in this establishment which turned into a dining NIGHTMARE!! Walked in at 10.40pm to grab a bite to eat on recommendation, Waiter was happy to seat us even though they were closing at 11pm, We ordered a couple dishes, rice nan etc and order came quite promptly, We were shocked that the dishes were extremely watery (Like we were served up the dregs) I Must say the Peshwari Nan was the Nuts, very nice indeed, anyways whilst we are eating another member of staff was grabbing tablecloths and napkins up in what appeared to be a strop, moving tables around with such force, that we quickly understood that he was trying to make a point, that he wanted us to hurry up and eat up as he wanted to go home, he clearly had the hump, no mistaking... We chatted briefly with him about our unhappiness at 2 of the dishes, and when asked where the Aubergine was in the potato and aubergine dish, he poked my friends fork into it, and shouted 'there's your aubergine' and continued to engage with my friend in an aggressive manner.. I quote 'What would you F**king know!! The aubergine is in there!!' We were totally shocked at his customer service! After clearing up the bill having the 2 dishes removed, the manager/owner started creating, screaming obscenities and saying the most ridiculous things, for instance 'why do I hate Asians?' (for the record I am Asian myself) at this point I asked my friend to record this little man on his tirade, because it was quite unbelievable, because he was not able to control himself with his verbal abuse.. Including calling me the C word! At one point during this fracas he pointed his finger right in my face (He is lucky I didn't bite it off) instead i acted instinctively and grabbed his gland points on his neck) to stop him in his tracks, he then said he was calling the police for assault, I told him to go ahead as I was happy to face the Police with all the video evidence/cctv available. when walking towards the door to wait for the police and have a smoke outside, he raced to the door and locked it behind my friend and the waiter. leaving me inside with him still screaming his head off and ranting and raving with personal insults, (It was so ridiculous it was funny) things changed when he decided to point a Spoon Fork and Knife in my direction, which I took of him in an instant, because now he was acting crazed! And I weren't having that! He opened the door immediately and the police arrived, No arrests were made after seeing our video footage, and even though I didn't feel threatened by this little Angry Man, they could see how I was provoked to grab him round his neck, To shut him up if anything! They also saw the way he pointed the cutlery towards me, so he had no grounds at all to complain about me. What a PLONKER!!! I actually have EMPATHY for this sad individual, he is obviously overworked, underpaid, has to deal I'm sure with many drunk customers and clearly has some SERIOUS issues. Clearly I would never dine here again or recommend this place to anyone, purely for the customer service, or lack of.... Definitely shouldn't be running a business in my opinion, has no people skills whatsoever, if you dare to question him on the contents of a dish! Be prepared, if you catch him on a bad day... watch your back! I felt sorry for the other waiter, who was pleasant and sweet natured who told us many times, 'Please leave, he is always like this, please go, I just want to go home, The poor man was scared shi*less!! And after reading reviews, it seems I am not alone. I would advise him to go to Anger Management, and remove the chip on his shoulder. And perhaps consider a change of career because his attitude and food left a lot to be desired and...

Had a narrow escape from having to dine at this restaurant by choosing to leave because there were BIG RED Flags at every moment. Never in all my life have we experienced such outright uncouth, intimidating conduct, & toxic energy towards guests from someone in the hospitality business anywhere in the world! It was unbelievable. My wife & I saw this place while staying nearby on our visit to London. She has already eaten a fast food meal but decided to give me company as I decided to dine here. Only one other couple was already dining (non-Indian). And only 1 other worker apart from the owner himself. 1st Redflag- Badly edited & presented, unclear menu, with items/prices crossed out etc. 2nd Redflag- Owner bluntly informed us that each person would HAVE TO order a separate main dish to sit there! This was not our need but his warped reasoning defied every logic. Plus his subtle hostile energy felt enough to to start making us feel uncomfortable. 3rd Redflag- We told him that we would be happy to order a take away instead, to which he actually tried to deter us by that they give smaller proportions for the same item in take away than for dine-in! By now, we knew all was not right here & experiencing extremely negative vibe, we decided to nevertheless order take away just to get away quickly from this thuggery & manipulation. We didn’t want to leave without ordering anything because we’d already eaten the bit of free poppadum they’d served us the moment we’d come in & sat down. 4th Redflag- As soon as we ordered, they presented us with an inflated bill which btw also included charges for the assumedly free poppadum! It was not about the couple of extra pounds for it but the whole obvious thuggery going on in the name of an Indian restaurant! 5th & Final Redflag which is Enough in itself To Stay Far away from this place even if the previous reasons have not yet unfazed your courage- The owner is racist, abusive, & threatening! As soon as we questioned this bill & also why they served us something without asking if it wasn’t on the house, this owner literally became mad with anger & aggression & simply started attacking us verbally; shouting, foul mouthing & abusing us as Indians saying things like, “You Indians are always like this!”, & “Work here first! & so on!! No kidding or exaggeration!! Btw, this also proves this restaurant boldly using the word ‘Indian’ in its name & giving such a bad rep. to genuinely good Indian restaurants, is not actually been run by an Indian or someone with genuine love for India, or even for Indian people or cuisine! We were dumbstruck! My wife was especially horrified. Needless to say, at this point, extreme concern for our physical & personal safety put it out of question that we could continue sitting in this madhouse. My wife & I literally dashed out of there without looking back while this man followed us to the entrance & continued shouting expletives down the street & we felt safe only when we were near our accommodation. We still are mind boggled at to how this place is even being allowed to continue. Had this been in the U.S, they would’ve shut down by now by the no. of formal...

The enticing descriptions of the meals on the menu, and the convenience of takeaway delivery, made Simply Indian a simple choice for last night's culinary requirements.

We embraced the speedy delivery only for our early concerns to be confirmed; that we should be duly suspicious at an Indian meal being prepped, cooked and delivered within 25 minutes. The result of us emptying the bag containing the 4 meals (that we'd carefully chosen), was one of uncontrollable laughter.

The pilau rice was basically boiled rice with a sprinkle of frozen peas and what was supposed to resemble caramelised onions but was more like an after thought at best.

The zeera aloo could have been rustled up by a 2-year old. Barely cooked slices of unpeeled new-potatoes, in a sauce that was like a watered down version of tomato ketchup with a sprinkle of chill powder. Hilarious.

The tarka daal, well, sorry for this but it resembled the consistency and colour of what reappeared this morning, much to my disdain.

The fish tikka hara - our final dish and anything but the pièce de résistance. 'Hara', this dish will not fill you up... Reason 1 : it barely filled a 1/4 of the tub it was 'presented' in. Reason 2 : it's disgusting. A slither of Tilapia fish smothered with what in most restaurants is the yogurty dip you get with your poppadoms to start the meal.

Fortunately, my friend and I saw the hilarity in this meal, without doubt, the worst Indian meal either of us has ever had the displeasure of experiencing.

Simply Indian? I'd contest this is simply nothing...