The Carpenter's Arms — Restaurant in London

This was the single worst pub meal I have ever had. So many things went wrong I will just use bullet points.

Arrived, no eye contact, had to wait until staff finished their conversation. Paid for 2 drinks until waiting for friends, then it reappeared on our bill at the end. They specifically asked if we want a tab, we chose to pay, regardless they tried charging us twice.. Petty. Waiter fresh out of school, zero knowledge about menu, no manners either, just didn't care. Cheap service, high prices. Table setup incomplete. Had to ask for everything at least twice.. Food overpriced big time. 3 quid for 2 slices of cheap Lidl-like bread as starter. What a joke. 26 quid for a ribeye steak that was so burnt and bitter I wanted to throw up. CLEAN YOUR GRILLS!... It's disgusting. Unevenly cut, unevenly cooked. Served with a half a handful of chips. Disappointing.. Wine mega-overpriced off a very small mediocre menu. Staff clearly has no idea about them at all. You should learn more about your most expensive items, just a thought... Laughable portions of 8 quid desserts, chocolate cake slice size of my finger. I thought it was an April fools joke but I didn't laugh.. When we asked for the bill (twice) we received another table's much higher bill. Then finally received our own bill with the initially already paid two drinks on... Those were finally removed but they still tried to charge us for service charge. The management clearly knows nothing about customer service in London. If you are this expensive you should do better!.. When you make so many mistakes at such an expensive place, you should offer some of the following to compensate: remove service charge, remove desserts, remove drinks, apply discount, be friendly and apologetic and show some sympathy instead of your meaningless explanation why your waiter is so bad at their job. Just amazing how little this place cares.

If you want to be a pub you should have more beer and not just 4 taps. If you want to be a restaurant you should have better food and service. If you want to be a gastropub, you should nail both!!!

My final conclusion (from someone who worked in hospitality industry in London for years): You need a new manager who cares, can create a good atmosphere, and can improve the entire team: kitchen, bar and front of house. The menu is too pricey for the quality of food and the size of portions, make them cheaper or make them better. Improve your selection of drinks or charge less. Kitchen staff needs educating about the very basics, so they can deliver quality food and your customers will happily pay high prices and will return. Not that complicated. Same goes for your front of house staff, friendliness and care pays off. As for the facility itself, it has a very old feel but not in the good way. New decoration is much needed, it's like a teenager's bedroom with all the coasters on the walls, so boring.. The uncovered rusty tables and chairs from the garden must go too before one of your customers eds up in hospital in need of a tetanus injection..

Overall I would give my experience a 0 out of 10, it didn't even hit the bar to get 1. Seriously, this is embarrassing for the owners. It feels like they can't keep up with the prices and simply went broke but too stubborn to admit it. Fish stinks...

Slow service, forgotten orders, an uncooked fish and a whopping bill with extras we never had - the delusional pub wanting to be a restaurant.

If you venture down to the Carpenters Arms soon, steady your patience as it will test you like a newborn. We are immediately barked at upon entering. “Do you have a reservation?!” in a tone that makes us feel we’ve committed a home invasion, of course we do have a reservation for this fairly empty place. Still a welcoming “Hi” akin to most other pubs wouldn’t hurt.

My eyes dart between the waiting staff like a desperate dog, begging, wishing for eye contact so that we might order drinks. After 20 minutes of subtly I’m eventually attempting semaphore - which works.

Drinks eventually clatter down on the table, spilling and I think about how we all used to go the bar to get drinks and how easy and wonderful that was.

Scanning the menu it’s clear that the prices are from the future, or the airport, or that week’s lottery numbers. I’ve wined, dined, sipped and sucked at many pubs and restaurants in London over my 20 years in the city and these prices are pure comedy. You have to laugh at them, else you’ll cry.

A lone ‘buratta’ arrives, breadless. We suspect it’s a mozzarella with similar delusions to the pub. We’re nailed £3.50 for four bread fingers to accompany it. My tears providing extra seasoning. The olives don’t show.

Now, the bream. This thing was like an anatomy class. Gill organs had been left in the head creating that not so welcome waft. Any chef worth his pink Himalayan salt (has to be doesn’t it?) knows that these are removed before cooking. The bream is pink raw inside, so much so the flesh does not come away from the bone. It is at this point we simply have to say something.

“Chef wants to know whether you’d like us to cook the rest of it?”. The stunned, curious and perplexed angry face of my wife is like the one she had when I told her i had broken my ribs skateboarding at the age of 32.

No new fish offered, our fish had obviously had an attempted de-boning performed on it by us before finding it as aspiring sushi and so I would’ve loved to see them try to reassemble and grill that poor thing some more.

We are asked if we’d like deserts after the kitchen closes. The bill arrives, fish removed mercifully but with drinks we never had suspiciously close the same value as the fish - probably co-incidence as this place is not that organised.

Nice...

🚇 Stamford Brook 🍺 £7.10 Rothaus Pils

This pub is located on a quiet street near St Peter’s Square, at the edge of Hammersmith in West London. The nearest Tube is Stamford Brook.

The Carpenter’s Arms first opened its doors as a pub in 1871, owned by the Thomas Salt & Co Brewery. The pub’s name originates from Thomas Ayling, a carpenter-turned beer-shop keeper residing at 7 St Peter’s Place.

The current owners, @wrenpubs_, took over the pub in 2024. It is the sister pub to The Surprise in Chelsea and The Walmer Castle in Notting Hill.

This is a stylishly decorated, one-bar pub that has a rustic charm. The servery is located at the front left and features a stainless-steel counter with industrial pendant lights above. The bar area is one long room with plenty of seating around sturdy tables. The decor consists of a boarded floor, white walls adorned with framed black-and-white photos and colourful prints, a deep red ceiling, and a marble fireplace. At the rear of the pub is a good-sized beer garden with an abundance of greenery.

The beer line-up is all keg, with a diverse selection of premium and independently brewed beers. I decided on a Rothaus Pils, which is a rare find on the taps in London these days. My pint was excellent, and the price point was as expected. The food menu offers seasonal, elevated pub classics. Fish and chips cost £21.50, and roasts are available on Sundays.

I arrived just before 2 p.m. on a humid, overcast Saturday afternoon in June. The pub was quiet inside, as all punters were out in the beer garden enjoying the weather. The atmosphere was relaxed and convivial, with a welcoming local-pub feel. The service was superb — I was served by an upbeat and friendly team member who was chatty and a great ambassador for the pub.

Sometimes visiting a gastropub for a pint can be an awkward experience, but not here. It was great to see that the tables were free of cutlery. I really enjoyed my visit — the staff were amazing, the surroundings easy to settle into, the beer garden a big plus, and my pint was top-notch.

Follow @thecarpentersarmsw6 for updates.

📅 21st June 2025

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