The Fish Inn, Ringwood — Restaurant in New Forest

So tonight, bereft of grand fortune by way of my own fiscal exposure to reality, I was granted enough surprising fondness of belief in my methods to afford my favourite food. But it would have to be cooked fresh, and not by me. So I wouldn't die. Because food is VERY, VERY IMPORTANT. And a million parsecs better than that nonsense crack cocaine. Which is not served here at all. No Sir. Nothing but love, excellent people, and wholesome good value for a much needed meal and the welcome friendliness of decent chaps and ladies.

And that's what I really noticed on my mission to get food to survive. Food I love. Steak au poivre. V and G's are my favourite steak in town, but they were full tonight, and it was true, they were.

So I dared in my complete machismo to venture beyond the humped back bridge of beauty to the welcome to the eye tavern that lingers just shy of the awesome road to Bournemouth, and the mega petrol station.

I was served by a young lad who most certainly impressed me with his awesomeness. I was in folly enough of ignorance not to get his name, but he was simply wonderful. We shall call him Brad. I am in love with Brad.

I desired a steak au poivre (as previously stated), and it came with good speed, and piping hot beauty.

I was more excited than the time I went to see Return of the Jedi as a boy with my chums.

Brad was like a demi God of customer care and welcome affections.

He'd be happily hailed a hero on mount Olympus, I'm sure.

The Fish Inn, being holy, due to its Christian connotations with fish is most beautifully thatched right now, with exterior lights that welcome in any roving punter.

The spirit is convivial, as you'd hope from a great British pub, and the ambience is one of 'everything is awesome', like that cool Lego song if you 'get the humour'.

'Trees, frogs, clogs they're awesome Rocks, clocks and socks they're awesome Figs and jigs and twigs that's awesome Everything you see or think or say is awesome'.

This is the song that comes to mind when you enter 'The Fish Inn'.

I imagine during the ancient times it was used as a glory house of hope for many a brazen believer.

I appreciated the inner spirit of love and chuckles. (Good spirits).

My ONLY whinge, if I may be so bold to direct complaint (which is a detail of personal imperfection not met by exterior forces from a position of self importance), is that I'm not a 'huge' fan of 'pub chips'. They're too cumbersome. Big, fat, ugly. You know what I mean. I like chips Julianne. The pretentious name taught by me the ex Vulcan navigator who later ran a pub with a hearty chuckle. (R.I.P.) for 'french fries'.

The pepper sauce WAS nice though, and the meat which was sadly only a rump (I'd like to see fillet and ribeye served everywhere, including Chessington World of Adventures), was tenderly cooked, much to my happiness.

I never eat the green vegetation that comes with steak dishes.

It defeats to me the point of 'ambrosia'. (Which is not a sweet creamy yoghurt purely, but the ancient term for 'Food of the Gods').

For a quasi omniscient schizophrenic, I felt very at ease in this place. And I would like to share further love for the blessed old dear who seems to run the show. What a blessed and sweet character she was.

The toilets were smart, interesting with non graffiti art to read while micturating, and the overall legacy of the establishment is one of 'mystical charming love properties'.

I've never had a bad experience at...

We went to The Fish as we had not been there for some time because of the roadworks which have now been cleared. We thought we would pop in for a drink and to have a look at the menu with a view to returning the following week for a meal. We walked in and spotted an empty table. I checked that the table did not have a reserved sign on it and sat down. 5 minutes later one of the staff came over and said that the table had already been “booked out”, I apologised and pointed out that I had sat there because it did not appear to be reserved. The member of staff directed me to a table round the corner that she said was vacant. I was about to sit down when I realised that there was someone’s personal effects on the table and the people on the next table told me that there was already someone occupying it who had popped out for a cigarette. I looked round and found a small table tucked away in the corner, but 5 minutes later another member of staff told me that that table was reserved too (again no reserved sign)! My partner asked what time the table was reserved from as we could move when it was needed, but no, we were told that we had to move straight away. Luckily another couple vacated a close by table and we were told we could sit there. Needless to say we drank up and left, so in the half hour that we were there we had sat at 4 different tables. We will not be returning to The Fish. Basically, if you don’t want to eat there they do not want your custom. So much for a place that advertises itself as a rural pub!! Incidentally, when we left we noticed that both tables that we had been told were “reserved” were...

FISH INN - OUT We visit the Dorset area twice a year and always look forward to stopping by the Fish Inn. On this occasion it was my husband’s 70th birthday and this was noted on the reservation. I also arranged for the Festive special. No reservation could be found when we arrived although later we were told there was one but not for the Festive Special. We therefore proceeded to order from the menu and both decided on the Pie of the day. They said there was only one left. A little surprising as this was around 5.30 on a Saturday evening. We decided to share and to add an appetizer – the fish cakes. The pie was excellent but the fish cakes were more like potato cakes with a taste of fish. Also the menu showed that they came with a garlic mayonnaise dressing. We were told that they were out of this and would we accept regular mayonnaise instead. This was a little surprising as I am sure the kitchen could adapt the mayonnaise with a little garlic. (It was not busy at this time). Finally we were ready to order dessert, as the sticky toffee pudding is very good. The server, however, was ready to present us with the bill with no mention of desserts or beverages. Overall a very disappointing meal particularly since the food and the staff in the past have both...