Ernie's Boondock — Restaurant in Des Moines

If you ever want to meet the human embodiment of a red flag, his name is Joe and he bartends at Ernie's Boondock.

My friend and I came in for something simple -- a High Noon Peach and a Mango White Claw. That's it. Joe decides to play "fun bartender" and slides us a shot with a smile, saying nothing except the unspoken implication every customer knows: this is on the house. Spoiler alert -- it wasn't.

The "gift"? Jeppson's Malört. If you've never had it, imagine drinking grapefruit rind steeped in regret and battery acid. Neither of us asked for it, neither of us wanted it, but in good faith, we drank it. Big mistake. Huge.

Then Joe pulls the shadiest move in the book: "Hey, it's shift change, can you close out?" And what do we find on the tab? Yep -- the disgusting shots HE decided to give us, added to the bill like we'd ordered them. Before we could even argue, Joe bolted like a little coward, leaving his mess behind.

Thank God for Elijah, the next bartender, who had decent hair, basic manners, and didn't try to scam us. Props to him for proving this bar can employ normal humans.

Moral of the story: if Joe offers you a shot, don't walk -- RUN. The only thing free about it is the secondhand...

The east side of the river really isn’t dirty anymore. It’s been gentrified with your typical cookie cutter businesses and people. I enjoyed my Saturday afternoon visit. The prices are typical with the area. The bartender was on point and it wasn’t to sticky. For me the ambience wasn’t what I expected. Numerous bachelorette parties and those people that ride that drinking wagon thing came and went. A privileged frat boy sorority girl feel but maybe it was just the day. Without the patio I don’t think I’d bother with the place and I wonder what happens in the winter 3/4s of their seating disappears. I’ll swing in again to enjoy a nice patio evening but maybe on a...

Been here before and it was always great. Who ever was the bartender tonight lied straight out of his teeth. I asked him what the specials were and he said all bombs were the same price and $1 off - I ordered a corona and a Yeager bomb - on the wall it says corona is $4 and bombs are $6 so with the special should be $5 meaning my total should have been $9. He charged me $12 I didn’t say anything. I ordered Yeager bomb again and asked him how much ? And this time instead of $6 it went up to $7. Just cause I’m not a regular don’t mean you can just try to cheat me. I paid my bill and left. Hopefully he needed the extra money...