Cheese Ranch Deli — Restaurant in Golden

I was just dropping off a package at the UPS store. A mundane Tuesday errand, the kind that usually evaporates from memory before the receipt finishes printing. But as I stepped outside, it hit me. Not a car. Not a raindrop. A smell.

A glorious, hypnotic plume of smoked meat curled into my nostrils like a beckoning finger. It was the kind of smell that bypasses logic entirely and plugs directly into your childhood. I swear I heard a saxophone playing softly in the distance.

Without realizing it, my feet turned of their own accord, classic cartoon logic. You know, when the scent becomes visible and actually picks you up by the nose? That kind. I floated across the parking lot and through the door of a deli I hadn’t even known existed. Right next to the UPS store. Had it always been there?

Inside, time bent.

A sandwich was $12. Natural, local sodas (six flavors, maybe more) were stacked in a glowing fridge like relics from a better dimension. $2.50 each. Was this 2018? Had I stumbled into some kind of time-preserved meat dimension?

“We smoke our own pastrami” said the cashier.

Pastrami, that smoky, peppered paradox of tenderness and strength. My mom used to make pastrami sandwiches on cheese rolls when I was a kid… nothing fancy, but sacred all the same. The kind of sandwich that made you believe everything would probably turn out okay. And here it was again, humming with heat and memory.

I don’t even remember paying. I just remember sitting at the window, unwrapping the sandwich like it was a gift from a forgotten friend, and taking the first bite.

Something shifted in...

UPDATED

The food was delicious and beautifully arranged. The personal delivery was very appreciated and gave the day a special flair.

My special someone lives in Golden and I live in another state, but wanted to do something really nice for their birthday. A certain charcuterie company is currently blasting social media with advertisements. When I checked out their website, I gagged at their prices! Out of my budget, I thought my idea wouldn't work. Then I thought, hmm, maybe I can find a cheese shop in Golden that could do a local delivery. I am all about shopping small and local and lo and behold, the Cheese Ranch appeared in my search! Looking at their beautiful menu I decided they were getting my money if they could or would be able to deliver to my special someone. I easily inquired through their website form and had a response email very early the next morning. Yes, they would do a delivery for my special person. I was delighted. We managed business right over the phone the same day. Rich, thanks for your great customer service. You are thoughtful and had great suggestions. Quick, efficient, and open to an unusual request; 5 stars.

This post will get updated next week with a food review. I am sure my someone is going to...

You don’t know what you’re missing untill you come here. Rich, the owner, AKA “Head Cheese” is top tier. He’s an expert who knows it all. You need cheese pairings for your girls’ wine night? Got it. Meats for your guys’ beer night? Got it. A fantastic near downtown venue for either of those with all of such supplied? Duh, got it.

The cold sandwiches or toasted paninis are literally next to no other. Highly, highly recommended the Yeehaw (extra jalapeños if you’re cool). Get the Bay of Pigs for the double meat (life hack, get double meat for like $2 more for essentially quadrupole meats… just sayin)

Don’t forget to get your side of fried cheese curds! Jalapeño is the best. You know its the real dill since it comes unbreaded. Curds ship directly from Wisconsin. Freshest and squeakiest curds you’ll find literally anywhere within Colorado.

You’re only doing a disservice to yourself (and your family) if you don’t go! Trust me you won’t...