Zambrero Elizabeth — Restaurant in Adelaide

My partner and I went in for our dinner this evening and decided to splurge and get two vegetarian power burritos and treat ourselves.. how wrong we were.

Firstly during this whole experience there was a partially made burrito just sitting out In the open on the bench. This should have been our first warning of a bad experience.

I'd also like to preface with an anxiety disorder, eating out is a rare treat.

The girl asked us twice what meat we wanted, we said very clearly Vegetarian, one burrito got 2 scoops of rice, the second got barely 1 and a half.

Then when it came to the " extras" we got sour cream, cheese and our " free" guac for having a vegetarian meal, the first burrito got a nice portion of guac, the second one was half a tea spoons worth. She then started piling the salads on without asking us first what we wanted, when it came to the sauces, she pushed the Chipotle sauce on us and upon further inspection it happened to be the one that was most full.

Remember that open burrito from before? Still sitting there.

She then asked if we wanted anything else today to which we answered one brownie please, to which we had to reach over and grab ourselves for her to remember..

She charged us $4 extra for the guac and $4 extra for the sour cream and cheese. Making our total $42!!!

She then only stamped our loyalty card once, and left our food so far over the counter I had to stretch to reach it because she had completely walked away. I was not offered a receipt, and had no chance to get one.. something I always ask for.

The burritos were wrapped so poorly I needed to lay it out flat and eat it piece by piece because it fell apart. The sauce was all down one end... and not to mention the size comparison was completely off. There was not 50% more fillings, it was the size of their small burritos.

Seriously disappointed. This place hasn't been this bad ever, but tonight was...

I visited this fine Mexican establishment sometime during the winter of '22.

What a Winter it had been, one for the annals that be true, anyway, it was on that day, a Wednesday I believe, that I pushed open the doors of said establishment in hopes to seek shelter from the relentless downpour of skymilk and at the same time indulge in some pinto bean paste and lettuce slivers. As I approached the counter to make my scanty food request it dawned on me, "oh my" I remarked internally, "how inconsiderate of me to enter such a dry and inviting restaurant in my current state", being that, I was soaking wet. I suddenly had an idea, this surprised me as I don't usually experience ideas of my own, usually any type of idea or creative thoughts were cast down at me by my poor uncle or frail aunt in a small plastic bucket, or at very least I would overhear them through the small cracks in the walls. Needless to say I seised my newly thought up idea and ran with it. In a fit of nervous excitmenti rushed the counter, startling the Zambrero employee. The man child was not of Mexican decent which scared me but I persevered and shot forth my idea directly at him. "Sir" said I, "may I please trouble you for some towels or napkin for my wetness" The non mexican man boy looked at me for a second and smiled. "Well" said he "we have no towels and are fresh out of napkins but you can buy some tortillas and use them to dry your handsome face and stylish hands and feet"

I feel to my knees I gratitude never had I been so happy. I clutched at his Zambrero brand tshirt and and pulled him in for a bro embrace. This undoubtedly made him nervous and he asked calmly but firmly to release him. "Can you release me" he said "Mexican i?" I replied "Mexican? I repeated "Mexican?".... "no, I most...

Although the children working the troughs and pots were sickly and riddled with confusion, they managed to construct an excellent food product. The cylinder I was presented with was of exceptional craftsmanship. I immediately telephoned 'the boy' and had him shoot one of the white peacocks to mark the event. I would have had him ring its neck but he hasn't the stomachache for it. I digress. As the chittering staff crawled up the walls I yelled to them that I would preserve this one in my 'News Room' and that it would not be converted into browns. However, as it were that I was in the advanced stages of starvation, I decided upon ordering another and gambled that this would be as masterful as the first. I was not disappointed. The screaming children who built these things set to work with an unmatchable fervour. Their elongated spider limbs scrambling in a shambles to create what I willed to be. I shook physically and was wracked with shuddering sobs as I was handed my tube of greedy feedings. I quickly paid and hurried into the dark of the car park. I squatted down beside someone's car and engaged in a belligerent masticatory dementia. I was truly the antithesis of an angel in those bestial moments. I was an arch demon of hell itself. When it was finally done I yowled at the moon and scampered away, never to return...