I had the misfortune of 'eating' (or not) in the bar area of Kew Gardens Hotel on January 25th this year. Now, I accept it was Burns Night, and we were indeed regaled by the lyrical sound of the bagpipes played by a delightful chap in his full kilted-extravagance - being a Scot with similar wardrobe idiosyncrasies this was an interesting backdrop to an intended catch-up with a great friend. All would have been well were it not for an appalling plate of food that was presented to me - totally inedible. Given the on-going event we were informed the menu was limited, and it was indeed so. I chose fish and chips, if only because it seemed an easy option. What appeared was a disgrace - the fish batter was a great deal closer to grey than golden brown, as well as being soft and not a little slimy. The fish within was undercooked and rather 'smelly'. The odd chip (and I've never been server a smaller helping) was merely hard and lukewarm. When our plates were collected I told the server that the uneaten food was terrible only to be informed that she would 'tell the chef' - I was stunned. Of course we had paid for the meal in advance - so I could pride myself on having paid a premium price for quite the worst plate of food I've been served anywhere in the world for many a year. Lesson? If an event in any hostelry may quite understandably reduce the accepted quality of normal service, tell the customer and/or reduce the price. Or of course, advise them to find an alternative venue. I accept this might not the normal experience of a meal at this establishment, but that does not make either the quality of food served to me or the reaction to my obvious distaste any less galling.