Flancer's Incredible Sandwiches & Pizza — Restaurant in Gilbert

I was curious about this place because it's kind of nearby, and rated 4.6/5, so I figured what could go wrong.

Everything went wrong. I ordered stroganoff, two pizzas, two baguettes, and the chipotle pasta. When I arrived they informed me they didn't know what to do because they don't have filet mignon for the stroganoff. How are they confused about what to do when my phone number is on the order form? So I asked if there is any steak of any kind, they said no they ran out, and asked if I wanted chicken. No, that's weird in stroganoff, so I asked her to just refund that item. I mistakenly thought it was a one off mistake, and took my remaining pasta, which had small bags of bread with it, and my two pizzas and left.

As I was driving I kept thinking "just look at the pizza to make sure". So at the stoplight I looked, and shockingly, it wasn't the pizza I ordered. So I turned around and came back to the store. The same lady was holding two loaves of bread and asked if they forgot something. No, you gave me the wrong pizza. A lady who doesn't speak English assured us it was the right pizza. It wasn't. The other lady told her it's an issue with the online order system. So I asked for another refund of another item. She let me know that bread she was holding is my bread, that she originally forgot to give me, and said sorry about that too (apparently the small bread is not the baguette, the small bread is other bread that normally comes with the pasta anyways). It's almost comical, except that it happened to me, which makes it a tragedy.

She started working on the refund and after a while gave me a receipt showing the exact same total she had already given me after the first refund. So I pointed out there is no refund, this is the exact same as before, nothing changed. She said it's just an issue with the system and it'll definitely be refunded. Sure, because everything else is going so well? So I told her I want to just give back all of the food and get a full refund. She called someone, said there's an issue, they talked, the end result is that nothing happened. She asked for my name, I told her and she said 'oh yeah, it's on the order, and is that phone number the right number?'. Yes. I asked her if that's the number she tried calling when she was confused about the steak for my stroganoff, she said "no, the phone numbers usually don't work". Yeah, if you don't even bother trying of course it won't work, is this even real life?

Save yourself the time, save yourself the chargeback on your credit card, just go somewhere else. Anywhere else.

Oh. Not that it matters, but the chipotle pasta isn't chipotle at all, it's red sauce without any pepper of any sort, especially not chipotle pepper. So that was also wrong. The only good thing is that my cat enjoyed the pizza crust, but Jesus Christ just set your money on fire and you'll be better off. This place cannot do one single thing correctly, and that isn't an...

I have loved coming to Flancer’s since they opened. Their bread is incredible, the food is great, but tonight will be my last visit.

The problems started when I ordered the soup of the day and they were out. No big deal I get it, they run out. The problem is that my server, (and somehow assistant manager) Connie S, did not let me know and she just had them substitute it for another option and didn’t even tell me. They just tried to pass it off. What if I had a food allergy? I don’t but this type of service lends itself to the kind of lawsuit that can shut down a small business.

Still not a one star review worthy mistake. Certainly not something I’d put on the internet. I’m no troll.

Then after dinner we order what has become a staple, the half baked cookie with ice cream on top.

However at this restaurant they prepare it a little differently. Most places serve it in an aluminum cake pan or a pizza dish, but Flancer’s for some reason does it in a boat shaped stoneware dish. First problem with this, but still not bad review worthy, is that it is significantly hotter for longer than say an aluminum pan. Since it comes right out of the oven to the table it is way too hot to touch. This means the ice cream melts completely before you can even begin to eat it. Annoying sure but not worth spending this much time on. But it is so hot that it will burn you, like touching a stove burn, if you touch it. Connie did warn us that it was hot. But I have a seven year old and it was ice cream and a cookie. He brushed his hand against the dish and burned himself. He began crying immediately.

Even still, all of this combined, I still would have returned. What really got me was that afterwards I went to talk to Connie and make the recommendation that they consider switching containers for the cookie. Her response, “Well I told you it was hot”.

Let me just let that sink in. Not, “that’s a good idea I’ll talk to the owner”. Not, I’m sorry that happened, I will be sure to talk to the owner about it.

Nope she was defensive and rude. Unless this is one of those themed restaurants where the servers are supposed to be rude, then I am shocked she has a job here.

Very disappointed in...

When traveling to hostile lands on secret missions and when hunger becomes a matter of life or death, one looks for something simple yet dignified, something pure, but still a pinnacle of the extraordinary. That is, I dare say the BLT. Better yet, a BLT with avocado. The BLT is the face of the American diner. Ever Diner’s got one, just like everyone’s got a face and yet they are all subtly different. You would think after a hundred years of American sandwiches that they would all have this thing nailed down pat, but that simply isn’t true. Some places do it right with style and grace and some places, fall flat on their faces. Unfortunately more places get it wrong than get it right. If a place can pull this one thing off, you know they’ve got a masterful cook if they can’t, then they’re not worth their salt or your time.

And that brings us to Flancers. Honestly, I didn’t have high hopes. As far as I’m concerned it’s in the middle of a wasteland. Everything out here looks the same. It’s hot as hell and the architecture is all new and uninteresting. Nothing speaks to me of the unique or history. It’s all strip mall and flat, flat, flat.

But let us address the damn BLTA, which was, Wonderful! The bacon was perfect, crunchy and thick but not tough. The avocado was mashed up just enough to ensure a good amount in every bite. There was a good bit of spice somewhere in the sandwich, maybe the bacon that was a great surprise! Like finding a pearl in an oyster or a piece of gold in a fresh running stream! It was mysterious and exciting.

The fries were great, but that sandwich captured the show like a cancan dancer at a school recital!

Ok, my faith in Phoenix is restored. I do have secret missions planned for the future and so I know at least one place I know I will be safe. One place where the food is good and where they the know the deep secrets of culinary arts. If they can do a BLTA like that, they can...