D's Diner — Restaurant in Sebastopol

“Where the coffee’s strong, the waitstaff’s stranger, and reality takes a smoke break.”

Roll up to D’s Diner and you’ll think you’ve stumbled into a David Lynch episode directed by Les Claypool himself, with Guy Fieri moonwalking in the background.

The place is a psychedelic portal with red vinyl booths, a jukebox that only plays Primus B-sides, and a menu that dares you to question what a “Sasquatch Slam” really is. (Spoiler: It’s eggs, bacon, pancakes, and something unidentifiable but oddly delicious.)

I ordered the “Chicken-Fried Ferret” just to see if it was real (thankfully it wasn’t), and the gravy? Thicker than a Sebastopol fog in November. The waitress—who may or may not be an interdimensional being named Carol—called me “honeybuns” and offered unsolicited life advice involving raccoons and moon phases.

Les wasn’t lying, D’s Diner is the kind of place where the walls hum, the syrup flows like lava, and existential truths are revealed between bites of hash browns. I left with a full belly, a slightly melted sense of time, and a craving to buy a bass guitar.

Would I come back? Absolutely. But next time, I’m bringing a notepad, a tape recorder, and maybe an ...

I waited outside at the picnic bench in a parking lot, which normally wouldn't seem pleasant, but it felt like an alcove. It was just breezy enough with great sun/shade ratio. I didn't have one to wait until my bf came out and proceeded to detail his uplifting conversation with a couple headed out. He was barely finishing his tale about the lady tasting her shake and loving it, as the diner employee appeared with 2 shakes in her hand. She didn't use an intercom, or yell and leave them sitting until we picked them up. She walked across the parking lot to deliver the shakes and let us know our lunch would be ready soon. True to her word, barely settled after tasting the delicious shakes, she appeared again with our food, offering up any additions, wishing us a great day, thanking us for our business. The parking lot was packed, full, but we were tucked and unaffected. Lunch was delicious, bacon cheeseburgers, fries, onion rings, vanilla & chocolate shakes and ranch and blue cheese dipping cups. I didn't ask how much it was, so I don't know about cost.. Great...

I was working around the corner from here one day and decided to stop in check it out for lunch. Walked in around noon to be immediately greeted by the owner who instantly took my order and rapidly got to cooking. There wasn’t anyone there at the time so my service was extremely speedy.

I went with my all time go-to burger of choice, the mushroom burger and a side of onion rings. The burger was cooked medium and executed with perfection! And I’m not sure if the owner grilled the bun but the bun was a little crispy on the inside which was very new to me but also very delicious and mouthwatering! The onion rings were also a grand slam out of the ballpark. They weren’t too heavily battered like some places do. The batter was perfectly light and crispy with a side of blue cheese dipping sauce.

Everything was super good. My overall experience here at D’s Diner was 5-star. If you happen to be close by in the vicinity, I would highly recommend this joint if you’re craving an all-around great burger. The owner will take great...