Kohler Waters Spa in Kohler, Wisconsin — Attraction in Kohler

I have been going to Kohler water spa's botox event with illume cosmetics (every 3 months) for the past 6 years. You have to email the water spa's contact (the Kohler water spa manager) to reserve a spot much in advance. Dr. Blake and his nurses are only there one day for apts, so it fills up quick as they are based out of Glendale and other Milwaukee offices.

The contact almost always changes every 3 months that I've had to schedule, due to turnover. There have been countless times where the Kohler water spa's contact has not properly set up the apt, not answered emails prior to the event in order to change a time for the apt, hasn't passed on proper information that was communicated with them to the illume staff, or hasn't even put me on the schedule all together. Illume is given the names and apt schedule in advance by the water spa's staff, and is unable to adjust it on their end with their staff. The nurses and Dr Blake are also bringing our charts from their office as they aren't kept at the Kohler water spa. Due to the massive disconnect between the Kohler water spa manager communicating proper information I have not had my chart with Dr. Blake or Connie countless times, causing me to sit and wait while they have to call over to their office and have files located in order to properly dose me, or not being able to be seen- even though I have had confirmation from water spa staff with my apt.

Because I love Dr. Blake and Connie I've always pushed through the issues with the Kohler water spa's contact and kept the email trail due to constant issues. However, Cait Horzen has been their contact for the last 4 times I've scheduled- and she has not accurately given info I have given her to the illume staff/ causing them to not have my proper file and results in me having to deal with major inconveniences. This happened when I was married earlier in the year and I advised Cait of my new name but added my old name as that's what my medical file would be located under to forward to staff- she never forwarded this information and I ended up sitting for over a half hour while they tried to locate my file from a Milwaukee office and send it to Dr. Blake's staff.

Most recently, I booked an apt for August 13th's botox event on July 23rd. Cait confirmed and then when I was emailing my illume botox injector on August 6th, she advised she had the list for apts for Kohler and my name was not on there. I attempted to contact Cait by email August 6,7th and again on 12th. I called her cell phone, and called the reservations line twice. Once waited for over 11 minutes with no live person, the second time I waited for 18 minutes with no live person to speak with. For Kohler water spa being a luxury spa, their customer service is absolute trash. There is no reason that there is such significant disconnect between the Kohler water spa manager booking the spa event and a provider, especially given the importance of the records. The fact that you can't reach a live person, emails and phone calls aren't being responded to and this is the manager... that is unacceptable. I will never go to Kohler water spa for...

Experience does not match the hype.

Stayed at the American Club: Concierge at check-in and checkout were lovely. Very good customer service.

We made plans to eat at Horse and Plow before our evening massage. We explained to the staff that we were going to a massage and needed to place an order right away. When others were served before us, we questioned, and they told us it was a computer glitch and that our meal hadn't been prepared yet. We did not eat before massage due to this problem.

Although they state the American Club is connected to the spa, that is not entirely true. Unless you stay in the American Club carriage houses, you do have to walk across the parking lot in order to get to the spa. Not ideal being that this is Wisconsin, and it’s cold most of the year. I didn’t need to do the cold plunge, because I did it on my walk back to my room.

S.p.A.: Luckily, a lovely attendant at the spa "Allie " heard that we hadn't eaten due to this issue and offered us protein shakes, so that we had something before we went into our massage. This was exceptional! I've never had someone in service think outside of the box like this. Please make sure she knows this and to be honest she really needs a raise or promotion.

My husband and I had a couples massage. My husband's massage was good. Mine was the worst massage I've ever had. I've been to many upscale spas, including Kohler in Burr Ridge many times and definitely felt that this massage was completely under par. Although the masseuse understood my pressure needs, it was as if he had no idea what he was doing. It was not relaxing at all. There was really no massaging included. Just pressure points being pushed. He also was making very quick movements and squeezed the bottle of lotion/oil very loudly throughout the entire time creating an anxious environment. I'm honestly very VERY upset about this experience as it didn't even come close to what a massage at a high-end spa should be. If my husband had not been in the room getting a couples massage at the same time, I would have gotten up and stopped the massage 20 min in.

Room: (276) Pleasant. No real complaint here. Although this was a low end room (chosen as we were just trying out Kohler for the first time) I was shocked to see that the fixtures in the bathroom were something my family had installed in their home in 1991. Very dated and didn't really showcase Kholer excellence. Despite being old, it was comfortable.

Water around 9 AM was cold and the shower needed to run about 10 minutes before hot water arrived.

The Wisconsin Room: Breakfast at the Wisconsin Room left much to be desired. Food quality seemed OK but left out for long periods of time. It did not appear fresh or as enticing as it should. Scrambled eggs were egg beaters and...

The glowing star of our experience here was Jacob, who was at the front desk of the Carriage house all 3 afternoons/evenings of our stay. He facilitated a last minute change in dinner plans, an add-on spa service, etc

The food at The immigrant, River Wildlife, and Blackwood Run was phenomenal. The dining did not disappoint.

The most noteworthy disappointment was the co-ed area of the spa. The main subterranean level was woefully inadequate, with too few lounge chairs for the number of booked clients. My husband and I were lucky enough to be early birds, securing a pair of adjacent lounge chairs. But many other guests weren’t so lucky, and especially during the day on Saturday there was an endless circulation of guests looking for lounge chairs. The woman next to us had to aggressively defend her husband’s lounge chair, which was effectively reserved with his book placed on the center, while he was away for 2 hours in the spa or hot tub. On Sunday, having observed the Saturday frenzy, we made sure to get up and get there efficiently - a. Feeling of urgency that we did not appreciate during our obscenely expensive getaway from the stresses of real life. It shouldn’t be a source of stress to find and maintain your place on a lounge chair in a spa this expensive.

The 4th floor lounge wasn’t much of a solution to this, also with very limited seating and in full daylight, rendering it more similar to a holiday in indoor pool than a luxury retreat away.

The spa is a tech free zone, except for the handful of people who snuck in their iPhones and the one woman I observed on a FaceTime call in the ladies locker room (astonishingly inappropriate to use a video call in a place where other women are in a state of undress). I, however, was slightly scolded when being told by an attendant to put away my kindle. I’m not sure I fully buy into a kindle constituting tech, especially in a place where iPhones were among us, but I suspect this was just bad luck that an attendant happened to circulate when I had my contraband kindle out and there was an absence of any of the illicit iPhones.

If you stay at the Carriage House, be aware that the included breakfast is perfectly adequate but is identical to that which you Would find at a Holiday Inn - bagels straight from the plastic sleeve, etc. It works, but it’s not the treat I thought it would be when it was mentioned at the time of booking. The area where you may sit to eat breakfast consists of pleather couches, leaving something to be desired in the ambiance.

Overall, this wasn’t the immersive luxurious experience I had expected...