UM Beach House Portals — Restaurant in Calvià

RIP OFF: Wish I went to the beach club this bootleg was based on! My overall feeling is that I wouldn't come back and I definitely would not recommend to anyone. The food and drinks were pretty average and the views were...OK. Its right next to a waterpark so you can see kids are screaming and yelling on the top of waterslides. The service was not the best, below average. I don't feel like the prices were unreasonable but, this place is a genuine rip off. The prices indicate that the level of service, hospitality, food & drinks, and experience would be more exceptional than it really is. If you do end up here, MAKE SURE YOU HAVE A WAY OUT! We waited on a taxi for 45 minutes. Because we were on a cruise ship, we were pressed for time to get back to the cruise port. When I asked one of the workers (for the first time after waiting 20 minutes) how long the taxi would take he literally yelled in my face! The aggression and hostility from that Mallorcan man was wild and unprovoked. He must have seen my fiance and I waiting for some time and anticipated our question for him because before I opened my mouth he screamed in my face that they basically have no way to tell when the taxis will arrive and we just have to wait. After that terrible experience I was hesitant to ask again, but after 10 more minutes of waiting and attempting to hail a taxi on the road, I had no other choice because I was NOT missing that cruise ship. I went to the hostess stand and literally begged and bribed a new lady to ask any of the workers/managers to drive us (15 minutes) to the port. Ultimately, I ended up paying the beach club €200 for a ride to the cruise port (we did make it in time). MIND YOU, I just paid a €300 bill. So ya know I...a ripped off. ALSO! That bathroom was foul, dirty, and disgusting there was piss all over the floor and there were barely any doors/privacy. This was unfortunately my real experience here, and while this review may seem harsh (and kind of comical) it's all true. May the odds be ever in your favor if you...

We decided to chose to come to this Beach club as a special treat. We were greeted and sat at a lovely table with great views. That unfortunately is the only positive thing that I can say about our visit.

Our waitress, made numerous mistakes and failed to bring us the correct food and drinks which we were then expected to pay for (which cost considerably more than what we had actually ordered) When we asked to speak to the manager, he wasn’t interested and didn’t want to get involved. The waitress then said that if we didn’t take the food she’d be made to pay for it out of her wages… we felt sorry for her and said if she could speak to the manager we would take the food but at a discounted rate. We were told that the manager agreed. We were not happy though as we were paying for food that we didn’t actually want for a lot more money than we wanted to spend.

When the bill came additional drinks (that we hadn’t consumed) had been added to our bill and the agreed amount of discount had not been taken off. We then had to go and find the manager as he wouldn’t come and see us to try to resolve the problem. After extensive discussions he took some drinks from the bill but we did not get the agreed discount. Our meal was ruined by this situation.

Our initial plan had been to spend the whole day there have lunch, hire beds by the pool and relax. We just wanted to leave by the time the meal was sorted out. The food we did get was mostly well presented but tasted bland and was also disappointing.

Altogether we were utterly disgusted with the manager for leaving his young waitress to deal with what was essentially a mistake on her part (we understand that everyone makes mistakes) and refusing to resolve the situation or even have a conversation. There are so many lovely restaurants Palma. I would recommend you go...

Walked in….. walked out.

Myself and my wife reserved the £150 day bed with the £300 min spend for our anniversary. Where we were put didn’t exactly match the description on the website. While we knew we didn’t get the more expensive XXL beds around the pool we at least thought we would have a nice space to relax and listen to the music for the day. Unfortunately we were put on a raised deck that faced neither the pool or the see and instead the kids water park / slide next door. It’s one of three beds that face this but we had the worst one crammed into the corner with said view plus a big wooden pole. Not exactly what I was expecting for my £450 spent to sit around a cool beach bar vibe. We are in a no kids hotel so I wasn’t expecting to hear them over the music in my day away at a nice beach club. I’ve been here before and enjoyed it but I just wasn’t prepared to stay in that spot for the day so I enquired about an upgrade but this went up to a £750 total and a £450 min spend that we just were not going to get too. I get that the price is the price but there was just no budging from the manager who was incredibly rude, frustrating and dismissive to talk too despite me showing her the advert Vs what we were given. Beyond frustrated at the conversation we had we walked out and left our £150 already paid deposit. Overpriced, minimal vibe, pretty empty, rude manager, minimal pool space. That was my second visit and my last. If you’re with a group or a partner you will get better value and likely have more...