The Boring burger — Restaurant in Guildford

Came here with my sister in Saturday afternoon. They open for service at 12, but we got there about 11:50. We noticed they had seating outside set up, and some people were sat on it in advance if them opening. Having worked in the pub/restaurant business before, I thought it best to check if it was okay to use the seating, rather than assume it's fine, only to find out that they have a set method of getting everyone seated and I'd be screwing that up inadvertantly.

I pop my head through the door and make eye contact with the only front-of-house staff member that day, and attempt to say "Sorry, I know you're not serving yet, but is it a problem to already use your seating and wait?" I got halfway through the word "sorry" before the staff member shouted at me "No no no no we open at 12, we are closed, we open at 12."

I wasn't trying to order a burger, I know they open at 12. This staff member assumed I was trying to cut the queue, and instead I was only trying to make their job easier by asking a question to confirm I'm not actively making things difficult for them. I could have been asking to use their loo, I could have been asking for some napkins to put on a fresh wound, I could have been letting them know some of their furniture has just been damaged. All of these are in the realms of possibility, but no, it was easier for this staff member to assume I was only communicating with them to be an annoyance, incapable of rational thought or reading the signs. Charming. The icing on the cake is that when I took my head out the door I heard him talking to the cooks "Why can't people read a clock." Completely unprofessional. As I sat down with my sister, the table next to us said that they were treated exactly the same way for asking the exact same thing I was attempting to.

Then once service started it became clear why they were so rude - they must have been insanely stressed, the problem is they take it out on the customers as though it's their fault. People asking where their food was after delays longer than advertised are often met with silence while that same staff member walks back in to sort the issues out, as though he's annoyed he's got another thing to deal with.

The issue is, there are no sensible processes in place and it's making their service suffer, and then that is incorrectly directed at the customer. Using names on orders instead of unique numbers would help (two sets of "James" were receiving orders at the same time when I visited). Telling people whether food would be brought to them, or making it clear if they'd have to come in to collect (which is typical for fast food, but this one brings it out, so probably should mention this to customers). Indicating on the order that you're seated outside so the cooks can use the service hatch for front-of-house to serve customers without having to carry meals through the bottleneck of the door that is permanently filled with customers waiting to order. The whole thing just feels like they had good food, then got a bit of publicity, and now they spend all their time trying to match demand and seem stressed because of it, rather than taking time during out-of-service hours to think about how they need to adapt their processes for the scale they're now at. If they can't do this, they'll continue to struggle.

Onto the food though, it was quite good. Went for the Boring Burger, and the cheese and sauce paired very well. The chips were also fantastic, although other reviews have hinted that they get soggy if ordered as takeaway.

I also ordered a milkshake with our meals, but when our meals came I politely (aware of how agitated the staff member was) asked if I need to pop in for the milkshake, and was then asked "oh you want that now?" The only way this is a reasonable expectation is if the milkshake is treated as a dessert, and that this were a restaurant setting. As this is fast food, it's fair to expect that everything is given to the customer when it's ready, not held back.

Extensive review because I want to be...

Strolled in this place whimsically on a rather torrid day, I for sure didn’t anticipate that I’d discover the best burger I’ve had in Britain and for years, on such a random occasion.

I ordered a double ‘boring’ burger & and American fries, along with a refillable soda. When the food was ready, I was pleasantly surprised by the generous portion of it: I’ve seen restaurants in London-which is just 40 mins away by train-charging the same price, if not higher, for burgers half the size. As for the fries, aside from being incredible crispy, they came in literally in a truckload, showered in house-made sauce and covered by a think layer of flavourful and umami-packed toppings. I am not a believer of taking snapshot of dishes before tasting them- in an age redolent of delicate social media posts, one came to know that what might be photogenic, is rarely as delicious. Thus, I always take a bite of my food first, before I take a photo-if at all, as most of the time the dishes would taste too forgetful and uninteresting to worth the trouble. I don’t have a photo this time- it’s certainly not because the food tasted inadequate in any way, but because I simply didn’t have the chance to do so. Yes, it’s that good.

The patties were flavourful, juicy, and well-seasoned, but in my opinion, an ideal burger should be assembled like an orchestra- which is to say, whilst the beef is of course the star and key to a good burger, its quality can still be massively augmented if it is complemented well by the rest of the components. In this case, I have to say what I tasted was exactly that, a concert of flavour, texture, and fragrance, designed and performed flawlessly. The ‘boring’ burger I tasted was classical in its components- an all-American combo. However, every detail was worked to a high standard, from the acidic refreshment of pickles to the nicely- rendered bacon, and the American cheese- which in my view, melts and tastes better than any fancy cheeses in a burger, especially a smashed one.

However, it was the bread that was the most surprising, and the fundamental drive for me to decide on the endeavour to write such a long review. It was simply magical. The bun was flavourful and nicely-toasted, yet not greasy or overly sweet, and despite the drippings from the patties, the bun held itself well structurally, and did not turn soggy at all- which made me suspect that it was a pretzel bun. But when I bit into it, the bun was so soft and airy in texture, that I felt it almost vaporised in my mouth- definitely not a typical trait of pretzel buns. I had little chance to investigate it further, as the entire burger disappeared, before I could even pull mu focus back from the gastronomic surprise I experienced.

In fact, I was in such a pleasant shock, that I almost felt obliged to pay my compliments to the chef. I didn’t regret this choice, as the great myth regarding this amazing bread readily solved itself, when I talked to the chef, Jamie. Apart from being incredibly genuine and hospitable, the knowledge, dedication, and passion Jamie has for his craft is simply inspirational. Even just on the seemingly simple topic of burger buns, he is incredibly knowledgeable and meticulous about every aspect of it, from the choice, place of origin, and fineness of the flour, to the hydration, proofing, and butter content of the dough. It was then that I learned they even made their mayo in house. No wonder the burger they served was so good, when it was made by a literal artisan.

I will of course be coming back, and next time I shall try the other items on the menu, that all sounds highly innovative and interesting according to their descriptions. Until then, I shall await that moment cheerfully, with a very high...

So after all the hype that was going viral on most social media platforms, it was hard to ignore and a random trip to Guildford little came on the cards. Nice sunny Saturday, we ventured into town and easily found the burger bar. Just need to find the queue and there it is!

Seriously, this place was busy with the queue going down the street and a few disappointed hungry burger hunters not wanting to wait moved on. Not us! We came to Guildford especially for the burgers and we weren’t leaving without one. We queued for probably about half hour before getting inside, it’s packed and you can imagine the seating is already packed, people watching tables outside for a spot to come free. You can order at the till but there is an electronic kiosk on the wall but management did stress that it would be a 45minute wait for the food. I say stressed because the heat was on! It’s super busy with demand high. These guys were working their buns off to get orders out ASAP.

It’s sadly probably a negative impact having all this attention. We were there just after lunch and they had already ran out of the buttermilk chicken tenders disappointingly so. But we came here for the Boring Burgers right? We had the pleasure of watching the team graft endlessly from the window whilst queuing outside, see where all the smashing was happening. Everything is fresh!

I myself went for the signature Boring Burger - a 114g smashed patty with dirty sauce, applewood smoked streaky bacon and American cheese minus the dill pickle and iceberg. (You can customise your order at the kiosk). The burger was good, juicy and tasty, but not the best, but I don’t think it’s trying to be. It’s a good burger! And being super busy and under pressure probably doesn’t help.

The best thing for me were the fries! Anything but boring. You can have their Boring Fries which still look good; just cooked with rosemary and garlic oil. There’s the Katsu Fries too which are covered in Katsu sauce, slaw, coriander and crispy onions. I had the American Fries which were smothered with cheese sauce, crispy bacon bits, decent amount of jalapeños and some crispy onion. These were amazing!

It’s a worthy visit if you’re in the area or a short trip away. Whilst gimmicky with the boring branding, it’s anything but. The menu is simple, not huge but there’s chef specials, a brisket option, sliders and some Korean flavoured mac and cheese with a long list of homemade sauces. There’s items for kids and meal deals for groups but is limited for your veggie and vegan friends.

At the time, the venue was super busy, so if you don’t mind the wait and lack of seating (indoor and out - however it looked like they were expanding into next door but one which might be open by now) we got a takeaway and sat on the green around the corner as it was a beautiful day. Decent portions, packaging was really good and great staff even under the heat in the kitchen. A must for good burger and...