Vardo Chelsea Restaurant — Restaurant in London

A mediocre experience overall.

We went to Vardo after a trip to the Tutenkamun Exhibition, looking forward to a late lunch. We sat down and 1 minute later a waitress asked us for our food order. Too soon we said, give us a few minutes. We looked at the menu and it seems to come from 3 or 4 different restaurants; a brief a la carte section, a greens and grains section and a random pizza section all on the same page. It was as though the owners had Googled "example menus" and chose whole sections at random to include on their own.

Once the confusion subsided we made our choices and then searched for a waiter. The restaurant was not busy (open tables all around and 3 in our immediate area) it took 10 minutes before we had to wave our hands, drowning victim style, to get attention. Orders placed. 4 pizzas and 2 grain bowls.

Food arrived. 2 of the 4 pizzas were lukewarm/cold, despite being warned about the apparently volcanically hot plates. One grain bowl was so spicy it could have stripped paint but other was reported to be quite good. We then had to wait for a knife/fork to be brought to the table. No complaint was made as this was mixed company and we did not want to make a scene - perhaps someone should have as we all reported the same thing later. One person finished quickly and her plate was whipped away fast and furiously. Now, this just might be me, but I hate that. Leave all plates until all have finished; clearing quickly makes the others feel rushed, as though they are holding up the group and the restaurant.

While the dessert menu did look good, we decided to order 5 hot chocolates and a coffee as "dessert". The coffee drinker reported that her coffee was hot and strong - excellent. The hot chocolates were thin and milky. Not worth the money or the calories.

Bad Points: Menu lacks a coherent theme and feels pasted together Service was very intermittent and seemed poorly trained Missing cutlery slow to be replaced Lukewarm pizzas served (a hot plate does not make up for a cold pizza) Hot chocolate was decidedly below average (think: half a spoon out of a tin, added to too much milk; like a miserly old uncle makes)

Good points: Food was served in an acceptable amount of time. Table water refilled often One grains-based meal was tasty Coffee was really strong and hot - good!

Overall: For a £108 for 6 this was a cheap London meal. Even so, I felt this was very poor value for money. Too much focus has been spent on the restaurant itself - decor and location - and not enough on a coherent menu theme and staff training.

UPDATE: Following the restaurant's reply, I reached out on the email provided but got no reply. Looks like it is only lip...

Visited during lunch hour on 4th May with my bestie, Rami.

We only had two drinks on this visit; a mocha and a matcha with oat milk.

The mocha tasted like any other mocha anywhere else. If you appreciate consistency, you’d be content. But if you’re looking for something special, na ah. Rami said the mocha was delicious, but he’s a doctor, not a barista, and the General Medical Council doesn’t test for coffee expertise.

As for the matcha with oat milk, well, it was busy, so I understand if they were aiming for efficiency. The matcha looked rushed and definitely not whisked properly, but I’ll let it slide, since I was in a rush too. And as we all know, haste makes weird, lumpy matcha.

Rami had a sip and said it tasted like raw salmon. But let’s be clear, he’s a full-time doctor and a lifelong matcha hater. Honestly, there should be a law against matcha slander. We’ll dismiss his commentary. The matcha was fine, not Uji matcha, but nothing to write to Kyoto about.

A service charge was included in the bill, but today’s visit felt more like charity because we paid for almost nothing, or rather, a cold one. I appreciate they were busy and we were in a rush, but given the location, they’re meant to be busy. A busy restaurant calls for better service, not less, so it’s just a shame they missed that.

To be fair, it could’ve been a nice place to hang out with your best friend. But it was the service, and the servers, that turned me off and made me feel like we needed to leave asap.

But to the man with the gorgeous blonde beard who brought us drinking water and a spoon, you’re amazing. Thanks for trying. Your energy was right. Probably the manager, but definitely a good man.

Vardo, maybe it’s Sunday, maybe it’s you. Maybe it’s just because I’m brown. But I don’t think I’ll...

I booked a table in advance notifying restaurant dinner would be a birthday celebration but only because they asked the question . We were a group of 8 . I remember going to Vardo when it first opened and being very impressed and happy for such a space bang in the middle of my favourite location . However , all the subsequent visits have been so so disappointing. Last night they gave us the worse possible table right by the steps going downstairs where our view was either the steps or the end of the bar together with all the racket emanating from it plus the mele of people surrounding it. The food was beyond awful . The bread came burnt . The pizzas were mostly all burnt on the crust . They got one of the orders wrong . The fries were definitely frozen . I don’t know what the leaf salad was supposed to be . The service was abysmal whereby the server kept forgetting things , spilled the wine , had the food touching his sweatshirt and on and on and on . Trying to get anyone’s attention was impossible . And most importantly the manager on duty was absolutely miserable . He literally growled when anyone asked for something . He was shockingly rude . It’s a travesty when establishments stoop to such levels and quite frankly I am not surprised with the current manager and inadequate staff . We will be crossing Vardo off our list going forward . And finally , have a word with your manager 🙄. He was the single most ill mannered person I have ever encountered in a restaurant . Perhaps he is more suited to the kitchen , doing the washing up 😐. Ps. Next time don’t ask about occasion for the reservation if you are not going to do anything...