Monotony is the death of passion. There are few things in life I care about. Liberty. Cats. The music of Ritchie Blackmore. Onion rings. Just like nonstop Deep Purple can make me tire of the sonorous sounds of the Man in Black, eating too many onion rings can make me lose passion for the grand endeavor.

I was eager for a change. A fresh take, or a new presentation. I think I may have found that in the onion rings from Stella's Lounge. Thank you once again to Sola Cepa super-fan Patrick Oetting for accompanying me. Read on.

Presentation and Appearance: 3.5/5

Ordinarily, I don't like the trendy restaurant style of odd or "unique" plating for the sake of being different. That said, in light of my new found hope for a change-of-pace in the otherwise stagnant realm of onion rings, I was pleased with the slight twist on presentation. Rather than a plastic (or wicker) basket, these were plated in what resembled a pie tin! What fun.

But really, the presentation was about the same as usual. I did ding it a tad because, as you can see in the picture, my onion rings arrived with one resting atop the pool of "angry mayo" dipping sauce. It speaks to a basic lack of care, or unneeded haste, in plating.

The onion rings themselves were two shades darker than the standard golden brown, perhaps "earth-brown." The dark brown was surprisingly unique, and inviting (though I may have been fooled by the dimly lit interior of Stella's Lounge.) A handful were cracked, another minus. A pair of rings were oddly fried together, with one onion ring stuck INSIDE another. The irregularity of the onion ring breading strangely suited them, perhaps in line with my new hunger for something to break up the monotony of the mundane.

Taste: 4/5

In another in a run of pleasant surprises, these onion rings had terrific seasoning in the batter. Though I couldn't taste out the specific flavors, the seasoning blended together into a strong and cohesive whole. The onion, unfortunately, had a fairly weak taste. It was slight, but certainly pleasant. The strong breading flavor made up for it.

Despite the weak onion taste, the rings were pleasantly plump and juicy. The taste, overall, was smooth and subtle. The accompanying "angry mayo" dipping sauce was appropriately spicy and creamy, and was a good complement to the onion rings themselves.

Texture: 4.5/5

The onion rings bordered dangerously on the line of becoming hollow, with puffs of air standing in for substance between a thin breading and a thinner onion. This was not the case at all. I throw around the word "crunch" a whole lot when I review onion rings, so I find myself forced to concoct a new turn of phrase to describe the delightful texture of these rings. I'll go with "The Triple C," Crisp, Crunchy, and Clean.

Nearly every bite of these onion rings had "The Triple C" (or alternatively, "The C Factor.") My companion, Patrick, described them as "a crunch worthy of a Pringle's commercial." Indeed, the crunch was almost like a potato chip. It was thin and easily collapsed in the face of a bite, but somehow, the onion ring still maintained its shape.

The onion itself had a lightly sweated, somewhat soft texture, but it thankfully avoided becoming overly mushy. The texture of these onion rings was wholly unique, and in many ways, a strange enigma I will never unravel as long as I live.

I docked half a point for one outlying onion ring: the double ring mentioned above. The entire thing collapsed under the weight of its own hubris, leaving me with a handful of breading and a heap of onion resting haphazardly in the basket.

Value: 4/5

Though the price was a moderate (for the trendy, urban atmosphere I found myself in) price at $5.50, the quality was well-above average in all respects.

These onion rings were truly unlike any other I've ever had, and that's a good thing. They have rejuvenated me to continue on my never-ending quest to test the Onion Ring Standard, this time, with a little bit more wisdom than before.

Total: 16/20

Sola Cepa.